Birthday ideas needed for 16 year old *Update had his bday*

WilsomomWilsomom
edited March 2013 in Parenting
I really don't know what to do for him. He's on gps house arrest so no visitors are allowed over, he's completely bummed that he can't get his license, his dad bailed on a promise to give him money for his first car by his birthday (which is in 2 days - & he DID give money to his 2 older siblings for their 16th birthdays). We don't have any extra money right now for anything fancy either, not to mention he's failing most of his school classes & doesn't clean his room or do anything else helpful. I'd like to cut him a break for his birthday but not sure what to do?

Comments

  • FrantasticFrantastic
    Honestly I wouldn't do too much for him because he doesn't deserve it. Maybe just pizza and cake with immediate family and a small gift if you really want to get him something. I know this has to be hard for you but he needs to learn.
  • MorgDeeBeeMorgDeeBee
    Dinner and a cake.
  • perlyperly
    I agree with @Frantastic. I would get some pizza and a cake, maybe a movie he may want to watch and that's it. Not trying to be mean, but you shouldn't have to cut him some slack. If he wants privileges, freedom and privacy he needs to behave so he doesn't get those things taken away from him. Don't feel bad hunn. He put himself in that predicament.
  • angie87angie87
    Agree with the ladies above
  • ChelsChels
    From reading most of your posts I'd punish him ON his birthday. He doesn't deserve anything special at all! You should spend his birthday money on yourself!
  • ExcitedForOctoberExcitedForOctober
    If you feel the need to get him a "gift" I think a cake is sufficient and should be considered his gift.
  • stephforever89stephforever89
    edited March 2013
    Don't forget birthday card. Maybe something that sentimental from childhood or even birth or even something really cool and old. It not about the gift the thought behind it that matters
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    I was kind of thinking the same thing, but wasn't sure if I was being too mean since it's the big 16. Thanks @frantastic @perly @morgdeebee @angie87 @chels @ExcitedForOctober @stephforever89
  • FrantasticFrantastic
    Be strong, yes this is an important birthday but he isn't doing anything to deserve an elaborate party. Just something small to show you care. Do not feel bad you are not being mean.
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    @frantastic Thank you :X
  • julesjules
    I would.defiantly do a card that way he has something to encourage him to do better.
  • captivatedcaptivated
    He most definitely has not earned the responsibility to get his license anytime soon!!
  • MorgDeeBeeMorgDeeBee
    Yes its a big birthday but he hasnt realy done much recently to earn the perks thats come long with it. Maybe in a few months if he
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    edited March 2013
    @captivated I'm so glad the courts told him no driving school because he has to take it to get his license. He might even lose his temps if found guilty.
  • captivatedcaptivated
    Driving is a privilege! Not a right. He has not portrayed the responsibility that is required to have the freedom of driving.
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    ^^ you're dang right lol @captivated
  • MáthairMáthair
    I agree with everyone. Cake, card, and a small gift. Someone mentioned renting a movie, I like that idea as well, as long as he has been well behaved. So maybe rent a movie, and do popcorn.
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    We did a pizza that he really likes, a movie & a card..which I wrote quite a long note in. I must admit, it felt weird to not give him any presents. He's the first child in 20 years of child rearing that I've never given a present to. I hope he understands one day.
  • perlyperly
    @wilsomom he will. And if for whatever reason he doesn't, don't feel bad. Always know in your heart that although you're not perfect, you always did what you thought was right to keep your children safe :)
    You are a wonderful person and i just know that all your kids will be able to see it. Its just phases of life that kids go through.
  • FrantasticFrantastic
    Good job @wilsomom and you know maybe, if he gets his act together and starts behaving, you can do something big for his birthday next year.
  • ExcitedForOctoberExcitedForOctober
    Don't worry, he is quite old enough to understand why he didn't get a gift.
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    Thanks guys. @perly @frantastic @excitedforoctober
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    @perly I had to come here & read your last comment again, it gives me strength & hope to go on, thank you. It really wears me down when they call me names, tell me how horrible I am & that they're going to kill me in my sleep.
  • perlyperly
    When things like those happen, don't give in to it. Call the cops right away. Say they are getting violent. I know its easier said than done, but its your house and your rules. If you were this big bad monster like they say you are, you would've given up on them a long time ago. The door is big and open and they can get the hell out of your house if they have a problem with your rules. You are a wondeful person and they are being ungrateful little jerks right now. They wouldn't last long out in the street with you.
  • WilsomomWilsomom
    edited March 2013
    @perly you are right, thank you. It's so weird being verbally & emotionally abused by your own children. I'm CONSTANTLY questioning myself wondering why this happened for them to turn out this way. What did I do wrong, ya know? I know I'm not perfect, but dang, I never treated them like they do me. I just don't get it. Thanks for your kind words though, it helps so much & I hope your hubby feels better! :)
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