welfare mamas?

edited April 2011 in Pregnant
So I am now on state medical, WIC, and food stamps since finding out I'm pregnant. My dad's wife gave me this huge long talk about how being on welfare is dirty and makes me look like a bad mom... it's not that I'm a bad mom, I just don't have all the money to spend like I used to since my BD lost his job... anyone else's family or friends look down on you for being on welfare....?

Comments

  • u know in australia u cant get assistance whrn pregnant we get assistance cause.my husband low income n I wouldnt say I'm a bad mum at all everyone needs help at some stage
  • we got 2 kids
  • I'm on everything that you are. I don't get looked down on at all and I get excited when my stamps get refilled. Lol :) you aren't a bad mom. You got what you needed to make sure your baby is ok. So I'd say you're a good one. Congrats. :)
  • Can I ask what are food stamps I live in Australia and we don't have em.
  • THey aren't actually stamps anymore but a debit card that gets reloaded monthly. Only can be used to buy groceries.
    @alyssa
    Screw what they think! You take whatever assistance you need to better your family @ the moment. I bet if u asked your stepmom to cover your expenses instead, she wld say no go to welfare.
  • Oh ok cool, in Australia we get money from the government once the baby is born but also depends on parents income. I get money from them, I work but don't earn much. And my hubby is on a disability payment due te sever back injury. Don't let other ppl put u down for excepting help.
  • edited April 2011
    My Grandma does but never says anything g. I wish she would. LOL me n Grandma would have words. No one pays my bills but me so unless they want to pick up the tab I say f off.
  • I would looove to have food stamps Medicaid and Wic. Happy you can get it!!! And as long as Yall are paying taxes your paying for it anyway. Better having help than being too pridefull and not having what you need to support the health of your child.
  • im not living with my bd yet but both his dad and my parents are one on welfare . and we both get looked down upon . I come to school and some one looked at me the one day and said o look shes going to have a welfare baby or you really should give that baby up theres no way you can support it . you dont even have a job and your boyfriend is no good who thinks he makes money but doeant really . I feel so sorry for that baby and the whole they were saying this I was like oh wow . my boyfriend / bd just got a job at macdonalds . I know its nothing fantastic but its something . its so hard to hear all this stuff .
  • You never know what a person is going through in their lives at any given moment. Judgements are not for anyone to pass out. If you have what you need and your baby is healthy and you are doing as your Dr says. Being as healthy as you can be for your baby, then don't listen to them.

    My only suggestion is don't add fuel to the fires. Don't be a part of the stereotype. Live your life in such a way that no one can say a bad thing about you or your child.

    I wish you much luck. Keep taking care of yourself and that precious baby.
  • You are not a bad mom for getting the help you need. Screw your stepmom! She doesn't know your bills and unless she is going to pay your bills she needs to keep her mouth shut.
  • I have everything u have except my kids have private insurance thanks to my parents. No one really knows BC I make sure I'm not the American image of welfare. I'm educated yet unemployed, so I speak adequately, my children are clean and involved in activities, my home is clean, I go to church, and I keep my appearance up. I do not beg ask or imply that I'm suffering or need help I just know EVERY month God is going to make a Way for my family. I di very little if anything outside of my means
  • Thanks for all the support guys! And I agree with what you're all saying, just because we get state assistance doesn't mean we are dirty trashy people! I think the next time she says anything I'm going to make her read this :] you ladies are amazing! Thank you!
  • My family sees it as at least someone they know isn't strung out is who is benefiting from their taxes. My family all pay a ton in and get nothing back at tax time, so they just pretend that I'm the one getting it, lol!! Being on welfare isn't dirty, being content with being on welfare for the rest of ur life ( with out a legitimate disability) is.
  • Sorry buy ur dads wife is wrong....when I was preggers with my first I was on all the assistance that's there was you as a mom is doing what u need to it doesn't mean that ur goin to be on it the rest of ur life I had medicad foodstamps wic all through school now I'm a nurse and ppl told me it was horrible that I would even think of getting assistance bit I new what I had to do and ur doing what u need to do don't let anyone bring u down
  • edited April 2011
    I am going threw a divorce and on food stamps....it help so much...I have been a SAHM since I grad highschool and had a baby and got married well 9 yrs later the marriage is over...(I wanst allowed to work he is very controlling)...I applied for TANAF last week for a lil extra money since he's a dead beat dad and not paying child support for his 2 sons...the judge did order him to keep me on his insurance and he has so far...I am also in the process of looking for the sperm doner for my youngest and looking like my bf will be able to adopt him since he is no where to be found so excited about that :)....I don't look down on anyone needing help...its when you abuse it and not try to get off and make a life for your self...I am so glad all this is here to help if not idk what id do...and for my parents help too they bought me and my boys a house...live them dearly...I hope I can be great parents to my boys like they are to me and my bro and sis....sorry kinda off subject :)
  • Look I really dislike wen ppl act that way. U need to worry only on the health of u n the baby who cares wat ppl r saying. U need to take care of ur family n if u need the state help go for it. Times r hard right now the extra help helps good luck. N congratulations
  • Im on medicaid and ill have wic tomorrow. Im cutting it late with wic lol im 35 weeks pregnant. But we were denied food stamps.my family is understanding about it tho me and my DF live on our own and its not dirty its help we all can use for our family. we all pay in taxes anyways. Congrats and good luck. :)
  • I've been denied every time I've applied for fs but after reading this I'm going to try again. I lost my part time job because I'm pregnant and my fiancee doesn't make enough to support the 3 of us. One question I have though is that he has a warrant from when he was in high school for running a stop sign that we def can't take care of right now. Would that prevent us from qualifying and would they send the cops over to arrest him?
  • I have only been on state aid for 4yr off and on and in that 4 yrs i didn't work work for maybe 1yr. I'm 27 and i have been working since I was 15 so I feel that i you have worked for years paying for everyone else that is on it. Its like unemployment you put in your years of labor at a job. You deserve some sort of benefit. I do work, But the type of job I have doesn't pay me great and the only assistant i get is food medi and wic. So no you not a bad mom. You are awesome in my opinion.
  • i didnt work when i got pregnant.. and i still dont work.. i get food stamps, cash assistance AND wic.. i live with my baby's father & he works under the table & gets food stamps too.. & it suure does help alot :)
  • My hubby works to much for us to get F's or I think even Med but we r able to get wic & it helps so much my little girl (9 mo) is a pig when it comes to baby food we go through even more then they give us & I get more cause I bf. I think it is ok to get assistance as long as u r HONEST about how u get it &really need the help. I feel bad for some people out there who really need it & can't get it bc they say there hubby works to much. But if he quits they could get all kinds of help.
  • @charlotteb my family is the same way....I have always worked and paid I feel like I'm not abusing the system as I have put in more yrs of paying in taxes than I have time getting assistance
  • @megrod88 no sweetheart. U r fine. Good luck.

    I wish I did get cash benefits, I do not qualify and even though I live literally survive on $1000 a month i lost $65 away way from my fs
  • We get medical and wic we were denied food stamps. We also get finacial aid for school and I work partime and my husband full. At first I felt bad about all the help we need and then I relized we are both finshing our education both have jobs we also volinteer so we are productive members of soicity. So what if we need help right now. It is not perminate.
  • @megrod88 no they don't look up criminal history. My fiancée is a convicted felon and it has no affect on our benifits. My friends BD also has multiple warrants and they have no idea! You will be fine.

    And to everyone else, thanks for all the support! You ladies are wonderful! And congrats to you all on your babies and babies to be :]
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