URGENT!! NEED SERIOUS ADVICE!!

MayMommyMayMommy
edited February 2011 in Pregnant
Iam a 20 year old mother of a 3 yr. Old son and also currently 6 months pregnant with my daughter. Never thought I would ever consider giving my baby up for adoption but that is what I'm considering and I'm scared. I've been with my fiance for over 4 years now . My son is his and also my daughter. Lately it feels like we have fallin out of love with eachother and I also feel like he's being unfaithful. I don't know what to do. I cry myself to self at night and I feel like I'm at a stand still because he pays all the bills mean while I had to quit my job due to my pregnancy. So now I have a 3 year old on my hip and waiting for another one. Reality has hit me and I just can't do this. Let alone I feel like I dnt want to be with my fiance anymore. This is an overwhelming feeling and I know without him my life will be hell with two kids dnt know if I can go through with adoption but seriously considering it now. Don't get me wrong I want my child but everything with my relationship is f**ked up. Why bring a child into this situation. Please ladies I need some advice!!

Comments

  • MáthairMáthair
    This is serious, you don't want to make any rash desisions. Is there a close family member you can talk to?
  • MiracleM2BMiracleM2B
    Awe Mamaz. Maybe the birth of your daughter will bring you guys closer. You need to talk to him. Remember family and friends will even be there. Heck, even complete strangers (: I promise you'll be okay. God never gives us weight we can't hold on our shoulders or obsticles that we can't over come. Keep your head high, your babies need you.
  • makeup_artist_mommymakeup_artist_mommy
    Mymy friend went through the same thin although she not living with him no more she left him in vegas and she's here in cali with her fam with her son and 11 month old daughter and she is doing just fine without him of course he give her money every month I don't think u should go with adoption if my friend could do it I'm sure u can as well were woman and were all strong...don't give up and keep ur head up mama...god bless u
  • angieangie
    Don't consider giving your baby up for adoption on him. If its the money you are worried about adoption won't be a good decision I'm sure you will make it with the support of family members. Maybe you guys need to talk about your relationship the bond with your baby girl is so strong it will be hard to let go of her but if you're seriously considering it look into the best family for her good luck with your decision
  • rootzmamarootzmama
    I think u should try to find a better solution before deciding adoption is ur only option. Obviously u want this child so dont give up just yet, maybe there is a family member or close friend or even one of ur fiances relatives that would be willin to let u stay with them until u have the baby and get on ur feet. That is if yall break up. Also maybe u should talk to him about how u are feeling. Communication is the only way to even start to resolve a problem. Otherwise u keep it inside, maybe even adding to your own fears :( be strong for your familys sake and fyi family doesnt always mean mama a.d daddy together. It was just me and my mama most of my life n I really admire her for being strong for the both of us. I am so sorry u are having these feelings it must be terrible just remember that u are a woman and so much stronger that even u know. If u decide on adoption make sure that is what u want and not what u feel forced to do. There is absolutely nothing wrong with adoption im sure ur baby will be loved whole heartedly whomever they are with. Good luck babe and try to smile it makes me said that u feel stuck in the position ur in. ive been there before its no fun, im here to talk and listen if u need anything <3
  • tiff87124atiff87124a
    You have a very difficult decision to make. You don't have to stay in an unhappy relationship. Hopefully you have family nearby that can help you get back on your feet and be there for support. If you do make the decision that adoption is best for your baby, you have lots of options. You can do an open adoption so that you can get updates on the baby and keep in touch with the family. No matter what you do just make sure you do it with a clear head. Best of luck to you as you make this choice.
  • nharmonygrlnharmonygrl
    If U truly decide 2 kids will be to hard for u to take care of on ur own...I think that is a really unselfffish thig to do and I really respect u for even considering adoption....there r plenty of women out there that wuld b great mamas and they can't conceive. I have 3 womwen in my family including my sis that r not able to get prego and have adopted...they r sooo thankful for their birthmothers and think of them as a true blessing ..without them they never wuld of been ale to live their dream of being a mommy. And if u want there's even open adoption so u will always b able to stay in contact with ur daughter....its all at ur discretion...so don't for once think adoption makes u a bad mommy...ur still their mommy and r just giving ur child a life u may not b able to provide them with.....just make sure its wat u reallly wanna do...but I have a great respect for women that r strong enough to choose adoption for their....just consider all ur optionss
  • cslivi86cslivi86
    Don't make your decision based on how you two are doing in your relationship. That holds absolutely nooo weight in a decision to keep your child. Talk to someone who truly cares about you. Remember whatever decision you make its a life long one that you have to live with.
  • MayMommyMayMommy
    Thank you ladies for the advice and your support. For the sake of my son and my unborn daughter I will do good with or with out him. so I have ultimatly decided that im going to keep my baby because I know god is blessing me. Iam a strong women and I know I will be fine! Just know you all had a major part of my decision so thank you again I feel so much better!
  • makeup_artist_mommymakeup_artist_mommy
    Awww I'm glad I can help u made the best choice....good luck mama
  • MiracleM2BMiracleM2B
    Yayyyyy (:
    God is with you!
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