advice on boyfriend's ex/1st babysmom

412mommy412mommy
edited February 2011 in Pregnant
Her boyfriend recently broke up with her (because she's a nut!). Now she is turning to my boyfriend (her ex) as a friend to get over him. I don't have an issue with that, but I come to find that she's now persuading their son to be distant from me. At 3yrs old, its wrong for her or anyone else to make things confusing for him. The boy is very excited for the new baby to be here in about 3 weeks. But recently he's been mentioning "mommy says that's not my sister/brother". (We don't know what were having & he changes his mind on what to call it daily lol.) Also this broad is calling my boyfriends phone as early as 630am while were sleeping! I don't find this cute or necessary. How do I get her to back off & make some damn friends!? I don't need this stress at this point in my pregnancy, advice please!

Comments

  • kenzie0713kenzie0713
    Sounds to me like u need to set the boundary line with him...tell him what will and won't fly and stick to it...u don't need that crap right now!!
  • 2girls1boy2girls1boy
    I would say you answer the phone and politely set the tone and boundaries.
  • katlillykatlilly
    Yeah, that some serious mind f*ing she's doing to that little boy and he needs to make it stop. Tell your man to man up and speak to this woman. Its def not ok!
  • 412mommy412mommy
    That's the problem! He gives her short answers & knows better than to answer the phone. I don't think you should be "friends", you only need to talk when it concerns the child. I especially hate that she's doing this to their son! We have a strong bond, but I know MY boundaries & wouldn't try to replace her. She's even gone to the extent of saying she doesn't want him at the hospital to visit the baby when he/she is born.
  • MáthairMáthair
    Tell your stepson that he is right that the baby will only be his half sibling, then explain that is because they will have different mommy's. This will prevent the older one from being confused and also not give the ex more ammo against you. Explaine that the new baby will call you Mommy or mom, but he will still call you whatever he calls you because the ex is his mom and always will be. Chances are she is just jealous of you and the fact that her baby daddy moved on and she is scared that the son will move on too. I wouldn't be surprised if she slips in little comments like "I wasn't that big when I was xyz far along." Let's face it us women can be petty and rude. Just smile and do your best to ignore her.

    But you really should set the boundaries between your boyfriend and his ex but try to do it calmly, he may just assume you are understanding and okay with what is going on. The sooner you do this the better you will feel.
  • 412mommy412mommy
    He understands its my baby & not his mothers. He used to call it his baby until his mom started telling him its not his its his dads & mine. I appreciate the feedback! I just don't understand how people can be so cruel when I've been nothing but understanding with the circumstances & baggage my boyfriend came with.
  • Rissalee7Rissalee7
    I have to deal with it to im lucky though my bf knows his, ex is a b word we want to give him an us photo but he said shell just throw it away
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