when do u know your marriage is at the end....pretty long

pinkie4pinkie4
edited May 2011 in Pregnant
I'm pregnant with our 5th child and everyday I just want to cry! I've been married for 8 years. I'm 27 and he's 38....we didn't know their was such an age gap till after the do was done. Any who at 18 I knew I could take on Tue world and what I was looking for in a man well as I aged I matured and fear that I made the wring choice. Communication is the key to every relationship and lord knows we can't figure it out. He isnt physically abusive but mentally I'm tired of the silent treatment he's always right if I say something he over talks me life is too short to be so unhappy but I don't know if he can be man of the house I want to feel secure and every 2-3 years he losses his job and were back at point a.....ugh I don't know what to do

Comments

  • lae3lae3
    dam girl im sorry.. if your feeling that way its probably getting close.
  • PEsMommYPEsMommY
    I'm young and the only thing I can go off of is what I seen my family members go thru. My mom was with my stepdad for 16 yrs and is so relieved that she finally left him. He didnt abuse her, but they had an "empty shell marriage" and he lost his job every so many yrs, they couldnt communicate and she left everything to move to another state. My dad and step mom split after 14 yrs and the failures of his marriage was too much for him that he went into a self destructive phase.
    With my relationship im newly married and 22, I talked bout what I expected in marriage and wanted in life. I say life is too short to be unhappy.

    Sorry I'm prolly not much help
  • vette_devilvette_devil
    I'm sorry hon. Do you think he would be open to any kind of couples counseling? If so, I would try that before you call it quits... I think every marriage -except abusive ones- deserve every chance of being fixed, especially when there are children involved; everyone screws up. If it doesn't work, at least you will know you tried everything. Good luck <3
  • pinkie4pinkie4
    Thanks ladies for the support....the funny thing is I was thinking of picking up and living to a new state or just moving I fear failure I worry that maybe I'm just being spoiled or emotional. I didn't have a dad in my home and I don't want to take that away from my kids but I'm tired of being in a room with so many emotions and crying....I just don't know what to do....I hate feeling lonely and on edge in my own home
  • pinkie4pinkie4
    @vette_devil we've tried counseling which didn't get us to far. I would ask him why did his last relationships end he said because the women said I became mean but they were just spoiled...its funny cause whenever I try to talk to him he says I'm spoiled....wow I wanted to get out my moms house so bad I thought he was the perfect one now that I'm a woman I can see why the other women didn't stay..not saying he's a bad man but were not going the same way in life I don't think....
  • vette_devilvette_devil
    I got to the breaking point with my husband after just a few years of marriage. Our daughter was around 1 & he was awful to me & we were so distant. One day we took a long walk while she napped in the stroller & I laid it all out for him that I was basically "done" and why... he said he had no idea & started crying & we talked for a long time & figured a lot out. We've been married for 5 years now & are expecting baby #2 in 2 months. I am not going to lie & say every day is perfect; but I'm glad I stayed & forever greatful that I opened up...
  • pinkie4pinkie4
    @vette_devil congrats on your 2nd bundle of joy and on working it out with your hubby!! Since this is my first real relationship I try my best but when we talk its tic for tac I say well I don't like the tone you speak to me in he will say well u do it. It seem like we were getting so close and then I realized I was becoming someone I didn't like....I fear leaving with 5 kids but I'm great in the mommy dept
  • billysgirlybillysgirly
    @pinkie4 I'm sorry to hear everything your going through...I kind of had a similar situation minus the kids... we rushed into getting married cause he was being deployed and we were really in love... well 3 years later he got out of military and he wanted to move back home (out of state) so we moved cross country away from my friends and family I figured we were young why not... and things were already starting to go south then too... two years here were the absolute worst! We became roommates rather than a marriage.. I worked full time he went to school and played video games... he lost his license so I felt like his mom driving him around and cooking and cleaning and I was never appreciated... he never physically abused me but his words hurt more.. I often thought he liked to disagree with me just cause... I would say the sky is blue and he would argue it wasn't... there were a lot of little (and not so little) things that just finally made me think enough is enough... You just know... I just knew I didn't want to be old and miserable, unhappy and feel unloved.... I wanted to be happy... that's it.. and I ended up meeting a great MAN who is my best friend and will be a great father... and I am so happy.... you will just know. Sorry this is soooo long!
Sign In or Register to comment.

© Vanilla Keystone Theme 2024