leaving your baby...

edited June 2011 in Pregnant
Hey ladies, just wondering when you think its ok to let your newborn on its own with sumone! I have an interfering mother in law whos already demanding this day and dat to have baby for the day and as soon as we come home from hospital!! Grrr! Im only 17 weeks pregnant with my first but i already knw i dont want to leave my baby alone for a cpl months i intend on breastfeeding and wont be working so have no need for anyone else to be minding my child. Whats yer opinion on this?

Comments

  • My mil and mother r the same way. I'm 26wks with my first and I've already hurt both of their feelings unintentionally. I told them the only way id be leaving my child with them is if its an emergency or at the very least after 4 or 5 months...
    Maybe3...maybe. I know that not all moms feel the same but I just couldn't imagine myself leaving her with anyone that early.
  • I stick with the rule your baby your decision. But I agree for the first few months especially with breastfeeding you don't want to give baby bottles too often. Just explain that you don't want the baby to get to dependent on bottles and not want to take the breast. Which does happen so is a perfectly valid excise.
  • @rckprincess2 im the exact same and have hurt mil feelings as well. But i hate being made feel bad over tings lik dis! :( when i say interfering i mean it lol shes driving me crazy!!
    @krazymomofadrian thanks ur dead rite ur baby ur decision thanks for the advise! :)
  • I think its really important to have "alone" time with your husband so I would suggest when you start recognizing her sleep and feeding schedule, let mil watch her for an hour or two so you and hubby can grab a meal or go to a movie. You can time it (best as you can) so baby is already fed and probably sleep/sleeping. As long as you're comfortable of course :)
  • I have told everyone that he may stay with them for a few hours but not over night for a while.. My son is 6 weeks old and the longest I've left him is 4hrs.. It killed me! I have let them know also that he is me and my fiances baby and WE will decide when we are ready.. My parents respect that.. I'm not sure if his mom does but she can get over it if not.. Don't do anything your not comfortable with don't worry about hurting other ppls feelings.
  • No problem, but do make sure you take some time just to yourself and/or your special person of choice. Whether it be your hubby, bd, or purple spotted.alien from the store. Lol
  • Im on about hours and hours at a time but Totally agree with u very important to have alone time with bd! But even at dat hard to even think of leavin baby for a cpl hrs for first few weeks lol i knw i prob sound stupid!! :0
  • And nope I can't stand even walking away from Dri and she is 2 months.
  • I think a couple hours is ok any more than that and u will go crazy lol my son is 18 monthd old and I still can only leave him for a couple hours at a time ive never left him all night yet and dont intend to til im in labor and I have to lol gl.momma the mil will get better mine was so bad she bought a bassinet bc she was gunna make me let him sleepover newborn!!! Haha yah right and she has never even babysat without me there once so im sure ur mil will back off a bit!
  • @lauren0204robert my parents are a 100% understanding as well i dont knw why mil cant get it into her head or understand why im like dis! Long way to go yet so hopefully she w calm down and back off a little! Thanks everyone for advise good to know that its not just me being odd and other pp feel the same!
  • @landynplus1momma omg dats hilarious my mil has bought a travel cot as well!!! Im only 17 weeks and we havent bought a thing ourselfs yet! But hopeully ur rite and she wil back off lol!
  • My MIL kept telling me she is off next weekend and I meed to pump so she can take the baby... um woman are you nuts??? My daughter isn't even a month old first off, and second I don't pump nor do I owm a pump. Her and I don't get along and before DJ deployed he kept saying please let my mom see her. I have no problem taking my daughter over there but she needs to respect me and my feelings on leaving my baby. Needless to say she is gonna make drama out of the situation
  • @Navybabyonway god help u lol! Dont know how im going to cope with any situatuon like that. I can imagine mine doing the same!!!
  • Im due june 22 and my husbands sister is comeing to vist in september for labor day and shes already planning to give us a break and what not. Im stressing a bit over that but I bet when the time comes ill be soo ready for a break!
  • Stand your ground & do what is comfortable for you! Our daughter was over 4 months old before we let her out of our sight, and then she was with my mil for only about 2 hours & I cried the whole time... and she has never spent the night with anyone else. It's YOUR baby; she cannot MAKE you give it to her at her every whim & fancy. And breastfeeding needs at least 6 weeks to get going smoothly, so I wouldn't even consider it before then, period. Good luck. :)
  • mine was about 3 1/2 months and it was only for a couple hours i nursed only so couldnt leave him long
  • My mil has to come to my house to see baby period.
  • If your not comfortable don't do it! It is your baby and your decision! The only reason my mom has a crib is because Im over a lot and my sister is too. Her hubby is a marine so she stays w our parents when he leaves.
    Don't let crazy ladies bully you. I don't. I don't even want a lot of help from my mil or my mom. Maybe shower time? But they will be at my house.
  • I feel the same. I'm very picky about who I want watching my newborn for any amount of time. I really only trust my Mom and my bf (of course). Although even he has some things to learn. The only problem is that I travel once a month for 3 days for work. I'm taking an extended maternity leave so shell be about 4 mos before my first trip. To be honest I would feel much more comfortable leaving her with my Mom, but I know my bf will take offense to that. After all it is his baby too. I just don't want him dropping her off at his parents or his sisters and I think that's what he would probably end up doing. I already know some feelings are going to get hurt before its all said and done.
  • edited June 2011
    My son is 1 week now n my mom is buggin me to been him ova I told her when his at least 3 months with my first son I did the same thing
  • My MIL and I had a huge arguement about this after my daughter was born. She thought she could take the baby every weekend! When I told her no, she said I needed to "cut the cord". And this was coming from a woman who gave her 20 year old son a 10 pm curfew. Ugh! We didn't let her stay the night there until she was almost two because there was just no reason for it. My MIL got over it.
  • I can not stand my MIL and I was so over protective with my first born, I wouldn't let him out of my sight. BUT do not turn her down! One day you're going to need a break or have to run errands or doctor, etc. But as a newborn, I understand if you don't wanna let the baby out of your sight, but maybe just invite her along to outings with you. Grandmas are always a big help, I rather leave my child with a grandma that love my baby even though I can't stand her, then a friend or baby sitter when I need to do things.
  • Well i have a 3 year old an a 1 year old an they have nevr been wit anyone else not once for any amount of time an prolly never will lol .
  • I'm 21 weeks with my second and due Oct. 18. The Steelers and Bengals game is Nov. 17... we live in Dayton by cincinatti, and hubby is a huge Steelers fan. If I'm feeling up to it were going g tl go to the game and let grandpa of the kids watch our baby boy and little girl. But hey with my first I wouldn't leave her alone with anyone before she was 6 months old.
  • Thanks everyone for advice huge help! :) x
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