Second my decision on this second pregnancy :(

Zbutt_MomZbutt_Mom
edited February 2011 in Second pregnancy
I'm getting really scared about going thigh with this pregnancy I mean I know I'm not gonna do an AB but I'm worried about if I'll be able to actually care for this child by myself my daughter and myself already fully depended in my father the bd basically a dead beat(same father for this to come) my daddy us carrying the house on his own and his own things like truck note phone bill etc and I feel like a burden to him and I get down so often now to the point ion know what to do with myself I feel so alone at times and I'm just scared to raise two on my own and they aren't even that far in age my daughter won't even be a year old when this one gets here that seems like its gonna be so stressful and I'm afraid to do an adoption and I know my family will highly disapprove of one I just don't know what to do or how to feel and I know the bd isn't gonna change his ways anytime soon wish I could have his help this he doesn't even check on my daughter really or me while in going through this pregnancy I understand he has a GF but I mean I am carrying his child at the moment

Comments

  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
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  • Zbutt_MomZbutt_Mom
    Like I try look further in the future to the point where they are playing together and I'll have ish against together if not all together and the three of us are okay and fine but I just get really down sometimes I don't wanna leave the house I just wanna stay in my room with my daughter my dad always checks on me but I lie and say I'm okay cuz I feel I can't explain myself to him
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
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  • Zbutt_MomZbutt_Mom
    I thinking about doing that cuz sometimes I won't wanna eat cuz of how I feel and I've lost nine lbs between one appt to another appt
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
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  • Zbutt_MomZbutt_Mom
    I get an ultrasound this Wednesday early morning and I somethings get endured about the baby but mainly I get down I wish I wasn't preggo a lot and when ppl smile and say congrats I really look like yeah thx
  • MzKamiMzKami
    Hi I can say I know where you are coming from being in a very similar situation my self. My daughter is one and I will be having another baby in july. I have many reasons why I don't want another child just yet. Yes they will have the same father but he is a deadbeat he doesn't support my daughter in any way. I'm a full time college student, don't have my own place, don't have reliable daycare, don't have a job, I want one but having daycare issues and being pregnant makes it hard to find one, I thank god for my mom and sister but I don't want to have to depend on them to take care of me and my kids so yea I though about abortion but that changed quickly because I think of how I was the kid everyone felt my mom should of had one with being my sister was only months old when she got pregnant again. I have days where all I can do is cry and I wonder what god has in store what's his plan, because I'm like I can barely afford one so I can only imagine two. I was asked are you depressed? YES because of the situation I don't know what the future hold. I was also asked are you exicited or happy ? Of course not , not a day goes by that I don't get down about it. Sometimes people just don't understand first thing out of their mouth is oh you"ll be ok easy for them to say any way my reason for telling you this is even if we don't want to hear it at that particular point and time god did it for a reason and its true he will take care of it although it may not be just as we want. I also wanted to let you know believe me you aren't alone
  • Zbutt_MomZbutt_Mom
    You just told my life story were in the exact same position I was going to an AB even went to the already appt but not the second cuz I got scared
  • MzKamiMzKami
    Believe me I feel you I tried to justify within the first few weeks if I just take the ab pill its not the same as the regulaer abortion bc if they can't s uction being you are too far they break the baby apart I still could but I'm almost five months so I definietly wouldn't now I'm not happy some seem to think I'm wrong I say I will learn to love it , hell truth be told yes I'm worried and scared some days I just want to say f everything but when I look at my little girl that changes because she is my reason for striving and to continue to try so I guess all I can do is pray and hope for the best but one thing I can say I don't plan on having anymore I've evn thought about getting my tubes cut tied and burnt
  • MzKamiMzKami
    Btw its crazy our lives are similar in a lot of ways my 2nd one due jul26 and my b day is feb 14
  • Zbutt_MomZbutt_Mom
    Ha omg I'm a carbon copy of you our lives are so dang on similar
    D-Day 07/24
    My b-day is 02/11 :)
  • amberamber
    Check out itsaboutlove.org :)
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