Girl me too lol but we gotta do what we gotta do...if u don't stay away just make sure its the right thing for u and baby...maybe see how things go until the baby gets here...see if he's changed... demand password to everything.... But make sure that u can find it in u to trust him again before y'all do get back together because a relationship without trust will drive u crazy...believe me lol
@newmomma13 I told him all of the things I want him to do to prove he really wants to change and said he has until the baby gets here, but I'm really not thinking he can..
Hun, I'm so sorry you are going through this right now. Know it probably doesn't feel like it but you seem like such a strong lady, your baby will be so lucky being raised by such an independent, strong and sensible mummy. Good luck x
I know lots of people who stay together very unhappily for their kids. Not questioning their decision as I think its personal, but I would be the same as you. Like I said it probably doesn't feel like it but its a hard decision you have made to walk away and you should take strength from your decision. It will take time but you will get there, take care (*)
@mrsg I do.. but I also feel like I'm selfish and I'll do anything to make the hole in my chest go away quicker.. I'm already thinking about seeing him and just having him hold me.. I know it'll make the pain go away..
I understand how you feel. I had a neighbor who I didn't like well but my boyfriend worked with her so I became her friend. Well we ended up having an awesome friendship if that's what its was called. She knew things about my boyfriend I had told her as a friend and someone to help me. She was my daughters first baby sitter.
Well 4 after baby was born and I had gotten married to him. I found emails to a girl I didn't know it was her she had made another account I guess. Not even surd they had sex just looked weird I couldbt confront my husband though he was training. But right before he graduated she told me they had. She wrote it on paper every last detail. I still haven't forgave him. Honestly. We are just now getting to start our life together since the army has basically had him for the past year for training. & I ended up pregnant again before we really could even deal with it. I was weak and wanted to be with him and didn't think twice about another pregnacy because he was my husband and I hd my first night out with girls came home a little drunk and just wanted him.
With all that said. He is not forgive. I think about it often and it kills me. He apologizes all the time still and is always telling me how wonderful I am and I am a great wife.( I know I am wonderful and a great wife nit many women would be able to forgive a man) I do love him and we usually have no problems. Unless I bring it up. I don't if we will make it. But I am giving it all I got. I can't exactly walk away from a.marriage as easy as a just a relationship with no legal bond. So I am trying.
For you, you only have one child with him. Not married. When you feel weak talk to him about it don't cave. Talk about it when ever it bothers you. Don't let him think his kind words and helping you is enough. Because it might not be enough a year from now when you think about it. You can message me on here or looked me up on facebook. Brittni Bradford. If you ever need to talk.
@mrsg there's seriously something wrong with me.. my head is telling me to let him go.. but my heart is burning with pain screaming to let him make it stop.. he'll still be my best friend, no matter what, but I don't know how long I can stay just friends, every part of me is so drawn to him I can't stand being away for too long, he's always found time in every day for kind words of how much he loves me and how he can't live without me.. when he messes up his feelings come out like a flood and it crushes me to see him hurt even when he's done something so wrong to me..
@bradford2 how are you able to be with him without forgivness? Did it get easier? Do you ever wish you could walk away? Does he get frustrated that no matter what he can't make it stop hurting? I've told him how much he's hurt me and he's been talking me through this whole thing, there's no one else I want to talk to about it.. I want him to know how he's hurt me and maybe feel a fracftion of what I'm feeling. I won't let him forget how much pain I'm in until it gets easier, not for a second
@pawgio it has gotten easier. Somedays its harder than others. I do want to walk away but its more like i want to walk away and hurt them same way. I couldnt though and wouldnt. It wouldnt solve the problem. I am also pregnant and can get a little over emotional some days because he did cheat when I was pregnant. He doesn't get frustrated it bothers me or I bring it up, he says he understands and will talk to me about it if I need and when I need to. We also live a very differentlife style. He is military and we have seen many couples split up with in the first year, so we don't want to be the typical young married couple that splits when things get hard. I am very much angry he did it when I was pregnant and said some hateful things to the other girl about me. But he did it before marriage and he did plan on telling me he had letters from basic training I read. It was killing him he didn't tell me and it killed him that when he finally told the girl he was telling me she decided to tell. Although he should of told me from the start, he at least wanted to tell me. Its a long story the girl is also very crazy you can say and kind of scared him when he wanted to me as soon as he realized what he had done. I read the texts and emails and some crazy letters she had wrote threating him, I would leave him . Which he believed because he knew I had become friends with her. But she was taking tha things I had said I would do, and used them to play both of us.
So its difficult to forgive and forget because he shouldn't of cheated period and easy to not let it bother me sometime because the girl was crazy and knew alot about him and I to get her way too.
We take it one step at a time though. I guess know how you feel but can't completely relate. Either way its hard.
Thank you, @pawgio and everyone else for sharing your stories. Knowing that we have all gone through similar situations helps When I was about 3-4 months pregnant my bf started talking inappropriately to other girls, talking to ex girlfriends, and just being shady. I caught him a few times but he assured me it was nothing and even tried to deny it!
Well, at the beginning of July we signed a lease on an apartment and I found out not even a week later that he cheated on me in April (although he denies it, the other party knows way too many details for it not to be true). The girl's bf messaged my bf and I on Facebook and told me everything. I'm now 33 weeks pregnant and think of leaving him every day. Yeah, he's trying to be a good bf now for the most part, but some how I just can't put all of the things he's done and said to me behind me. I think about it all day. He's treated me horribly throughout this entire pregnancy. This should be the happiest time of a mom-to-be's life! It has been my worst... When I try to talk to him about everything he just gets angry and says I need to stop bringing it up. But then he gets mad when I don't tell him how I'm feeling... At least your bf had the guts to admit to you what he had done. It hurts but I know we have to keep being strong for our babies >:D<
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@oregonmama love you too mamma!
Well 4 after baby was born and I had gotten married to him. I found emails to a girl I didn't know it was her she had made another account I guess. Not even surd they had sex just looked weird I couldbt confront my husband though he was training. But right before he graduated she told me they had. She wrote it on paper every last detail. I still haven't forgave him. Honestly. We are just now getting to start our life together since the army has basically had him for the past year for training. & I ended up pregnant again before we really could even deal with it. I was weak and wanted to be with him and didn't think twice about another pregnacy because he was my husband and I hd my first night out with girls came home a little drunk and just wanted him.
With all that said. He is not forgive. I think about it often and it kills me. He apologizes all the time still and is always telling me how wonderful I am and I am a great wife.( I know I am wonderful and a great wife nit many women would be able to forgive a man)
I do love him and we usually have no problems. Unless I bring it up. I don't if we will make it. But I am giving it all I got.
I can't exactly walk away from a.marriage as easy as a just a relationship with no legal bond. So I am trying.
For you, you only have one child with him. Not married. When you feel weak talk to him about it don't cave. Talk about it when ever it bothers you. Don't let him think his kind words and helping you is enough. Because it might not be enough a year from now when you think about it.
You can message me on here or looked me up on facebook. Brittni Bradford.
If you ever need to talk.
@bradford2 how are you able to be with him without forgivness? Did it get easier? Do you ever wish you could walk away? Does he get frustrated that no matter what he can't make it stop hurting? I've told him how much he's hurt me and he's been talking me through this whole thing, there's no one else I want to talk to about it.. I want him to know how he's hurt me and maybe feel a fracftion of what I'm feeling. I won't let him forget how much pain I'm in until it gets easier, not for a second
So its difficult to forgive and forget because he shouldn't of cheated period and easy to not let it bother me sometime because the girl was crazy and knew alot about him and I to get her way too.
We take it one step at a time though.
I guess know how you feel but can't completely relate. Either way its hard.
When I was about 3-4 months pregnant my bf started talking inappropriately to other girls, talking to ex girlfriends, and just being shady. I caught him a few times but he assured me it was nothing and even tried to deny it!
Well, at the beginning of July we signed a lease on an apartment and I found out not even a week later that he cheated on me in April (although he denies it, the other party knows way too many details for it not to be true). The girl's bf messaged my bf and I on Facebook and told me everything. I'm now 33 weeks pregnant and think of leaving him every day. Yeah, he's trying to be a good bf now for the most part, but some how I just can't put all of the things he's done and said to me behind me. I think about it all day. He's treated me horribly throughout this entire pregnancy. This should be the happiest time of a mom-to-be's life! It has been my worst...
When I try to talk to him about everything he just gets angry and says I need to stop bringing it up. But then he gets mad when I don't tell him how I'm feeling...
At least your bf had the guts to admit to you what he had done. It hurts but I know we have to keep being strong for our babies >:D<