I'M BEGGING FOR HELP

edited November 2011 in Pregnant
I POSTED THROUGH OUT MY WIFE'S PREGNANCY ABOUT HER SEX DRIVE WE ARE FOUR WEEKS PP AND STILL NOTHING AND SHE SAYS SHE HAS NO PHYSICALL DESIRE FOR ME OR ANYONE ELSE.....I AM LOSING MY MIND..........I AM REACHING OUT FOR HELP..AND DON'T SAY TALK TO HER CAUSE I HAVE TALKED TO I AM BLUE IN TEH FACE...DOES NO GOOD

Comments

  • Shes ONLY 4 wks PP! The body takes up to a year or more to recover from pregnancy.

    Relax!

    I know little spermies want to come out, with your wifes help, but I'm with her.. I do not care for sex. We tried, that shit hurt!
  • Give it time. Hormones are a funny thing. Shes probably tired out. I'm sure it'll come back. Also women don't feel sexy after birth so try and make her feel safe and sexy. Good luck x
  • Well first of all I wouldn't take it to heart I'm sure shes just tired and has a lot going on. Women are not the same as men when we have a lot going on we feel like we dint even have time to think about that stuff. Just continue being helpful and try to be understanding and whatever you do make sure she feels beautiful :) because I'm sure one she needs more time to recover and two she feels a little different about her body then b4 she was pregnant.
  • SHE WON'T EVEN KISS ME OR NOTHING......IF I NEVER TOLD HER I LOVED HER OR KISSED HER FIRST IT WOULD NOT HAPPEN
  • definitely do not cheat on her. that would be a slap in the face. honest to god i had really no sex drive when i was pregnant. my area down there was always irritated and i was always too tired. turns out bf cheated on me and gave me chlamydia. its just hard being pregnant. you feel disgusting and fat and sick all the time. just give her time. im still with my boyfriend and he loves his sex life. im 3 months post partum and just now started feeling like myself. maybe she should go to the doctor and see about antidepressants if shes not breastfeeding. post partum depression can cause you to feel like that. trust me i went through it. just do not give up on her, trust me if you support her right now she will appreciate it in the long run
  • oh and as for initiating everything such as i love yous and kisses and all. just keep it up. shes just not her self right now. dont get down on yourself. pregnancy is just hard.
  • I'M PAST DOWN ON MYSELF AND I AM IN TEARS RIGHT NOW @FWEE....I WOULD NEVER CHEAT ON HER I LOVE HER WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL WE WERE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER IT'S JUST WE HAVE LOST EVERYTHING
  • nothing is lost. hold on to it. please, it will be worth it. trust me youll find out. i lost myself when i was pregnant. just be supportive. her mind is just elsewhere
  • I AM TRYING TO BE @FWEE...I HONESTLY AM......BUT WHEN SHE LOOKS YOU IN THE FACE AND SAYS I DONT' WANT YOU PHYSICALLY AND HAVE NO FEELINGS BUT YET I WANT OUR FAMILY TOGETHER..THAT CUTS DEEP IN A MAN'S HEASRT
  • I'm sure she loves you she just feels weird have you asked her to talk to her ob she may have pp depression or maybe even marriage counciling?
  • @momof22be..........i have recently mentioned conciling she didn't really have a comment.......i just dont' think anything would help she says it's just gone
  • I really don't think anyone can ever just stop loving someone ever so try to mention it again and maybe try to talk to her and try to remember why u both fell in love in the first place
  • i have talked to i'm blue in the face...i sat her down tonight and she knew somethign was beothering me and she said what is it ...when i began to explain my feelings she jupmed up and said i'm not having this convo again
  • dont give up. if you love her just try to understand. think outside the box when trying to get her attention or show her that youre her soul mate. trust me if you just be there for her while shes going through this shitty time im sure she will remember it.
  • It sounds like ppd. Keep trying to get her to consider counseling. As far as being physical my daughter is almost 6 months and I'm just now getting any desire to be physical with my husband. Hopefully she'll come around soon. I'm sorry you are going through this.
  • I pushed my husband away during my entire pregnancy. I think I kissed him myself like 3 times and none on the lips. I'm 6 weeks pp and I just now told him I was IN love with him again and finally the walls I put up during my pregnancy have started to crumble! Pregnancy hormones are shitty!!!! Trust in God that she'll get past her hormones and that you were ment to be as one in marriage and together.
  • Give it time I know its hard. She went though a lot being prego and hormones it will happen just give it time %%-
  • idk guys i just dont' know..i'm not very hopeful
  • And sex 4 weeks pp would hurt like he'll. I know it hurt so much at 6 weeks pp that I don't know when ill want it again. Don't bring up sex again. Wait for her to tell you she is ready and focus on helping her take care of that baby. She's probably so exhausted that sex is the last thing on her mind. Its time to figure out what your relationship has when you take sex out of the equation. If you truly love her you will respect her wishes and wait.
  • edited November 2011
    Personally, I had no sex drive for months. I felt the same way she is telling you she feels. For me, it was just being overwhelmed, exhausted, insecure with my body, and I guess you could call it being in "mommy mode"...the child takes priority over everything right now. I guess I just felt like sex was the last thing on my mind. Some of the way I was feeling toward my hubby was b/c he wasn't very helpful with the baby and that angered me and made me see him in a different way. My suggestion would be to try helping her more, give her some time to nap/rest/time for herself...she will feel refreshed. Also, try boosting her confidence both in her physical appearance and as mother. Lastly, just give it time...the last thing we want is pressure to have sex when you feel like crap, you think you look like crap, and all you want is a long shower and a nap. Good luck!
  • Give ur wife time. It might take a lot of time!!! I coukd swear it was my husband writing this. Ur wifes body it still dealing with sooooo much. Once baby starts sleeping thru the night and ur wife can get some goid sleep im sure she will come around. Shes probably suffering from a little ppd. Just b there for sure and wait it out. My husband had to wait like 6 months with our last one before i would let him touch me. Had nothing to do with him it was all me and how i felt.
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  • I think it's hormones. Give it time and remember she loves you and is still attracted. She isn't in control of her body right now it's like the hormones have possessed her. Those same hormones made me hate my man. The smell of him made me sick. But I'm me now and I could never hate him. I love him with all my heart. So coming from someone that went through something like it, give her time and stay strong cause she doesn't even know who she is now. Later in once she's not sleep deprived her drive will come back but maybe it will take a nice date night to bring back why she is in love with you.I really don't want you to hurt. It's definitely not you she's just temporarily a different woman. You are still the same man.
  • I had crazy hormones that made me hate my bf until I was 3 months. Don't give up yet. There's a lot of adjusting on her end right now.
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