My son hates me lol

dadof2n1togodadof2n1togo
edited February 2012 in Babies
Not really a laughing matter I guess but he really does. Whenever I hold him he screams blue murder but pass him back to mummy and it stops instantly. So hate this feeling as I feel like I missed so much again like the other 2 kids when they were babies. My wife starts back to work in a week as I am currently on disability for another 6 weeks minimum but probably longer as wound isn't healing properly and probably requires further surgery.

When she starts back we can only get daycare monday and tuesday so I am quite worried about how will cope with him screaming all day and getting other 2 from school. On top of that I feel that I will have all the house work and cooking to do also but at moment I struggle to walk 100 metres without nearly collapsing. W are currently waiting to see if we have been approved for a nanny through a agency here called shining angels, which would help with school drops etc until I'm better.

Guess just needed to get this off my chest as it is causing huge arguments here at the moment with me getting the couch for company most nights lol. Thanx.

Comments

  • JoshnEviesmumJoshnEviesmum
    thats gotta be tough. im on disability and hubby works nights so i know what you mean about struggling to do it all. fingers crossed that hou get your approval for the nanny. also, maybe your son will be better when mommys not around. my lo is a real daddys girl and doesnt want me at all when hes there but when daddys not home shes a lot more responsive to me... itl work out, and the housework aint going anywhere ;-) dont sweat the small stuff, the house wont fall down and u need to make sure youre looking after you too.
  • dadof2n1togodadof2n1togo
    @JoshnEviesmum thanx. Yeah its killing me being at home as I have always worked and provided for the family up until now. I have been off work for nearly 6 weeks now and 4 weeks being at home after 2 in hospital. Am hoping to get signed off by my medical officer but its not looking likely as I had a collapsed lung which is being a bitch healing. I have a review on monday to see if I need more surgery to repair.

    My work mates have been great but not the same as being on the road lol.
  • sehra4177sehra4177
    He will def get used to you, we were in the same,situation. My son wasn't used to my fiance but hold him more even if he cries. Talk to him as much as possible. I hope all works out for you:)
  • momma_ericamomma_erica
    The first few days may be tuff but once your lo realizes u are his primary care giver he will warm up to u. Just try to make him feel loved & secure. Ask mom if she has any "tricks" she uses to sooth him so u can do the same. I'm sure everything will fall into place before u know it. Do what u can around the house to help Ur wife out but don't over do it & effect ur recovery. I'm sure she will appreciate an help u are able to give with house work even if its not that much. No one with kids/babies has a perfect home with everything in its place & spotless. At the end of the day your health is most important.
  • Janet_2011Janet_2011
    I'm so sorry that you are going through this, it must be tough since guys always want to be the one supporting the family financially. It is going to be tough at first but the more time you spend with him will get him more used to you. And you can't do everything in the house since you aren't completely healed.. do what you can, she should be able to appreciate it. Im a women and my house isn't always perfectly spotless, I have two kids and taking care of them is a hard job.. just remember that what matters is that you get better. I wish you the best. :)
  • preggointxpreggointx
    My son was like that at first now he and dad are best friends it will get better try to concentrate the play area so it's not much to clean I have a bottle warmer on side of my bed for when I just dont want to go all the way to the.kitchen...i mrs. a while set up lol try to bond with him during bottle feedings and state in his eyes so he.can develop a stronger attachment
  • DavidnAadynsMamaDavidnAadynsMama
    My son was the same way with my husband. Then, I went back to work (we both work but have different shifts so hes always home when im gone). He quickly attatched to my husband & now he cries more for me than him lol. I wouldnt worry too much hun. Btw, My husband lays him belly down on his chest & pats his butt when he screams. It almost always helps. Good luck! Update us on how it goes, but dont get too frustrated the first few days may be rough but WILL get better. Try to stay calm, bc babies can sense your frustration and will make them feel the same. Again, good luck!
  • Mom2McKennaMom2McKenna
    My daughter used to do that so I made my bf start doing things like feed her or put her to bed to bond better..she does get crabby with him when I'm around (SAHM) bc she would rather me hold her but when I'm not around she is fine (she is almost 9 months) she is getting better without me being around...I think just start feeding the baby and putting them to bed stuff like that to bond with the baby...but I think you will be just fine!
  • dadof2n1togodadof2n1togo
    @everyone.
    Thanx I have always felt fine with the other 2 when they were babies and they used to really scream lol. I think a lot with Zander is me being so up and down emotionally and not coping being stuck home all day everyday. I am still waiting for clearance to even drive as I suffered a punctured lung that hasn't fully healed even after nearly 6 weeks.
  • EiralynnesMommyEiralynnesMommy
    @dadof2n1togo We have the same problem with my daughter. She is sick or anything and she always wants me. She will scream and my husband gets upset so he gives her back to me. Its not that they hate you, they're just babies and need each parent for different things. I hope it gets better for you!
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