worried

sehra4177 · April 2012

My daughter has been going to the nurse almost everyday about headaches. I didn't know until the nurse called me that this was happening. So, after her going down again on Fri the nurse called again and said she was concerned bc it seems it may be something other than headaches. She asked if there were any other probs or probs at home. I know my daughter had prob in the past with some girls. The nurse said she would talk to a counselor bc I told her I keep asking if something else is wrong but my daughter won't tell me maybe a counselor can get it out of her. So Fri after school I asked again, nothing. So, I decided to share what I went thru in middle school, I had a girl who said she was my best friend...but when I didn't do what she wanted or she felt like I was talking to someone else and not her she would kick me or punch me in school. Alot went on, I'd lie to my mom and say I was sick to stay home from school.bc I was so scared of dealing with her. So finally my daughter told me what is going on I guess a girl and boy are bothering her, the boy called her a bitch. Mind you My daughter is the friendliest kid ever. The daycare she went to (I still take my son there) everyone knows her and always would tell me if they had a class full of kids like her they'd be in heaven...so she doesn't act like that calling names etc. So before her teacher said she took care of it. Now I find out its still happens. She says her teacher says to ignore them, I'm sorry but if someone is making noise or disturbing class, you can ignore that but in 2nd grade being called a bitch isn't something I feel should be ignored. I don't feel I'm overreacting at all...this is how kids end up committing suicide...a kid recently jumped off a bridge 2 streets from my home bc of bullying. I'm scared for her and am hoping when I go down to her school Mon that they fix this and quick!

myHEARTZx3 · April 2012

Omg that's crazy. So sorry for ur lil girl but that's bs something needs to be done. I volunteer at my kids school and that's just not tolerated. My son is in first grade and he constantly gets notes written to me for doing stuff like talking or playing with her friends while in the lunch line..or playing with water on bathroom break. Lol I mean his teacher tells me every little thing so I can imagine if anyone cussed a classmate out they'd be in big trouble. And 2nd grade and already using that language? Smh

jnlelrod · April 2012

Oh I agree!! I would be all up in that school!! I'm sorry your daughter is dealing with that. I have a 2nd grader and kindergartener too but I haven't had to deal with that yet. I can't believe they are doing nothing about it! Our school tells me anytime that one of my kids do something bad usually. You are not near overreacting tho. I would feel the same way. I'll be praying that whole mess gets better asap

sehra4177 · April 2012

@myHEARTZx3 and @jnlelrod thx:) I know in this school its a big thing not to be a tattle tale, so my daughter is afraid to say anything. Bc she did say awhile ago about one of the girls causing issues. I said tell the teacher when it happens and she said the teacher says she is being a tattle tale! But yet everyone is so big on this whole bullying thing. The teacher did tell me only one time about an incident, bc my daughter walked out of school crying. So I'm wondering if she wouldn't have said anything if my daughter wasn't crying. She told me about the girls disagreeing and told me she would take care of it. I thought it was taken care of until the nurse thought there was more going on other than Amaya having a headache. My fiancee is so upset he said we will go Mon to talk to the principal. My only concern is how will they handle it bc I don't want everyone making a big deal and then all the kids will know she told. I basically don't want to make it worse but I definitely want it taken care of.

starrxoxo9 · April 2012

This breaks my heart!!! She's still so little and shouldn't have to deal with this kinda stuff!!!

I hope you get a resolution.

sehra4177 · April 2012

@starrxoxo9 thx me too:)

jnlelrod · April 2012

Yep it is a tough situation for sure. I'm just so sorry she is having to go through that and you too

shouldnt be having to go thru that at all. By the way, I looove her name, Amaya

kayleigh27 · April 2012

Has the teacher contacted the boys parents on this issue? I would go up there and have a chat with her. Obviously your daughter cannot just "ignore it" and she is missing class time because of it.

sehra4177 · April 2012

@kayleigh27 I don't know if she has. I mean you can "ignore" the talkative kid in class and the class clown but to tell.a child to ignore a kid who is calling you names is different. Its specifically to her and that's not something you ignore. I am going down there Mon regardless of what her teacher did bc obviously it hasn't helped. She told me months ago she would take care of the first issue. My daughter says even in the morning when they wait to go into school these girls are shoving each other, boy my daughter but I guess its two sisters. That's why I drop her off right on time and boy before.

mommyof3girls · April 2012

Wtf is wrong w parents that they have a 2nd grader calling a little girl a bitch? That pisses me off so damn bad. Dont tolorate this for one second longer. Ur man is right, go in and talk to tge principle and demand it gets fixed now. I have a first grader and it really scares me how mean kids can be today. There r some really shitty parents out there. Imagine this boy is calling a girl a bitch in 2nd grade... Whats he gonna do to girls once he starts dating? Its 99% the parents fault tho. This poor little guy was taught these things. Kids learn by example.

sorry to ramble. Just breaks my heart. I hope things get better for ur baby girl.

jennalynne87 · April 2012

I cant believe a 2nd grader is calling somebody else a bitch! Makes you wonder how his parents talk to each other. I am sorry shes going through this!

Mallory27 · April 2012

Thats horrible id be doing the same thing! The teacher who said to ignore it should be fired! How many other kids is she dismissing that way. grr

starrxoxo9 · April 2012

@mommyof3girls you are so right!!

sehra4177 · April 2012

@ mommyof3girls @starrxoxo9 @ MattandMallory27 @ jennalynne87 thx all I'm hoping it gets better. This teacher has always irked me for some reason now I know why. I went thru it in middle school and I was crying all day yesterday bc I don't want her feeling the way I did. I'll let you know what happens Mon.

Granny2B · April 2012

I hope things work out. Do you know whether other teachers at the school are better? If not, is there another school? A magnet public school or a good private one. I would do whatever it takes to make sure my child had a good school situation. With my daughter, I would visit the classsroom often and would build a relationship with the teacher. I would talk with the teacher often about how things were going. Drive for field trips. Volunteer. Try to stay involved.

sehra4177 · April 2012

@Granny2B thx, I'm not sure about any of the teachers in this school. Last year her teacher was also big on the tattle tale thing too. We can't switch schools at all they dont allow it. My sister sent my nephew to a school closer to my moms and somehow they found out and gave her three days to move him to the correct school. They really don't do field trips, its weird. Last year they went on one which at the time my fiancee went along. It is hard to get in the classroom bc I have the baby and my two year old. My family is all drama so I don't like to watch the kids. We are trying to work on.moving bc it only gets worse in the middle and high schools around us. So I'm hoping this is her last year in this district.

momaynot · April 2012

I am a teacher and I can tell you we do love children and don't want them hurt. I would talk to her again and let her know if it isn't taken care of you will go to the principal. You can have the guidance consular there when you meet for suggestions for you and the teacher. I tell my kids that a tell is when you or someone else is being hurt or in danger of being hurt emotionally or physically and a tattle is just to get someone in trouble. For example telling me they are playing with a pencil when they should be listening would be a tattle because it isn't hurting anyone. Firing a teacher for a misunderstanding is a little overboard. She may not know she was called that name. You need to tell her and she needs to discipline the child. I know people will say she should know everything going on but I am here to tell you kids can be very sneaky and there are a lot times while you are trying to help struggling learners. Please let her know!!!! I can promise you if she knows she will help. We aren't in it for the money. We really do love children. We are human though and make mistakes. Hers was to not looking into this more. Continue to be the wonderful parent you are by being an advocate for your child in talking to that teacher, with the school consular, right away!!!!

momaynot · April 2012

sorry double post

sehra4177 · April 2012

@momaynot I never said anything about getting her fired. I'm not about that I'm kids concerned bc my daughter told her what this kid called her and she said to ignore him. I just want it to stop. Like you said above tattling is when your trying to get someone in trouble for something that isn't effecting you. But this is effecting her and her school day. My intention isn't to fire anyone its to make sure my daughter doesn't get hurt further. She is a very good student always getting citizenship awards and her grades are great. I don't want yer to hate going to school bc of one kid.

momaynot · April 2012

I agree with you. It was another poster that said she should be fired. You need to talk to the teacher. Ask her if your daughter said that to her. She may have or she may have told her some kids are picking on me. Either way she should have looked into it more! I was just showing two points of veiw. I am sure if you talk to her she will do something. What is happening with your daughter is wrong.

sehra4177 · April 2012

Well we already talked to her during conferences. My fiancee said something to her...this was after the first time when she came out of school crying. He told her and she said she took care of it. I would think if you have an incident like that, that you would keep a closer eye on those involved. Even just to make sure it doesn't happen again and also that the person telling you its happening is telling the truth. So bc this would be the third time we've talked we are going to the principal Mon to talk to her. I never was told about this kid calling her bitch and I feel if my daughter told the teacher this I should have at least been told about it. And on top of that she shouldn't be told to ignore something like that bc my daughter is 8 she then felt like it was no big deal and left it go. That means in the future she will get worse done to her and feel like she can't tell anyone. It shouldn't be tolerated at all. @ momaynot

momaynot · April 2012

I am AGREEING WITH you!!!!!!!!!!!!! All I am saying is she may not have known he called her the b word. I am happy you are talking to the principal, it needs to be resolved. You are misplacing your anger towards me! I may be a teacher but I am not her. I am just saying talk to her and the principal. She may have done something already and if not she will, I am sure. I always tell parents if you believe half of what your kids tell you about me I will believe half of what they say about you.

I would also explain the difference of a tattle and tell to that teacher. I am a mom too and you can bet your bottom dollar I would be at school talking to someone. School is a place your child should feel safe. I would also request that she is not in the same class with that child again next year.

sehra4177 · April 2012

@momaynot I'm sorry I didn't mean it to sound like that...just a whole lot going on. Not only this but ongoing family drama. It's just too much between crying over my daughter and now the family. Never ends:( sorry again...but thanks for your perspective:)

second_time_mommy7 · April 2012

When a child walks up to an adult that is against "tattle taling" and says "so and so said/did" thats usually about all the child can get out before the adult says "don't be a tattle tale". I personally think telling a child to not be a "tattle tale" is bs. If there is something that bothers a child enough to tell on someone, you shouldn't ignore it. Just because its not important to you or others doesn't mean its not important to the child.... That being said if your daughter did in fact finish her sentence before being told not to be a "tattle tale" and the teacher did in fact tell her to ignore it, not only does she need to be fired she needs her a$$ kicked. If she could not personally take care of it she should have taken it to someone that could. The shit teachers get away with these days is insane. I would not only demand that the teacher/principle resolve this but that the teacher/ principle contact the other child/children involved parents and have a meeting with you, the teacher, the principle and the other parents. The teacher/principle needs to make it seem as if they are bringing up the concern not you and your child. Good luck hun I hope things get better. I also went through the same things in middle school so I know exactly what you mean about making it worse.

sehra4177 · April 2012

Ok well I called the school this morning and the principal called back. We talked and she said she would handle the situation. I got a call about an hour later. The kids is suspended and its been taken care of. The teacher said she never heard my daughter tell her about him calling her a name. I'm not sure how true that is but my main concern is this kid is taken care of, I'm gonna give it time. If anything else happens I will take it to someone higher. The principal is def someone who will not tolerate this. Her teacher seems like more of a pushover. The principal also knew exactly who I was talking about when I told her the kid who was doing this. She said "oh I know him very well". Hopefully this is the last I'll hear his name.

starrxoxo9 · April 2012

Good for you! I hope she can go to school in peace

sehra4177 · April 2012

@starrxoxo9 thx me too, when it comes to my kids don't mess with them, lol. I'm so protective of them. I'm just glad they didn't make me have to take it up the chain bc I would've;)

starrxoxo9 · April 2012

Lol I know what you mean, and my baby is only 9 months old!! I'd go to hell and back for her!!

mommyof3girls · April 2012

Glad something got done. I hope things get better now for ur little girl.

sehra4177 · April 2012

@mommyof3girls thx so much

Mijita · April 2012

Happy you got results! I just hope the parents of that little boy are a diligent as you, otherwise it's a wasted suspension that will result in another.

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