I need some help here!! please :)
@captivated Im tagging you because you are so good at doing research 
Im trying to figure out what is and is not legal for child "punishment" (for my 7 year old)
I live in BC canada
heres what I found so far for spanking but it makes no sense to me right now... I didnt really get an answer from it http://www.parl.gc.ca/content/LOP/ResearchPublications/prb0510-e.pdf
im looking for things like, spanking, washing mouth with soap, locking bedroom door. Before anyone says something, I have only spanked a few times and he got soap once. locking bedroom is just being considered because time outs dont work he wont stay in a corner or in a chair or on a mat no matter how many times I take him back AND he gets physical like hitting & kicking if I try to pick him up or even take his arm and take him to his room. And he wont stay in he will just keep opening the door and slamming it or he will come out and stand just outside his door. Anyway, if anyone can help research I would REALLY appreciate it
Im trying to figure out what is and is not legal for child "punishment" (for my 7 year old)
I live in BC canada
heres what I found so far for spanking but it makes no sense to me right now... I didnt really get an answer from it http://www.parl.gc.ca/content/LOP/ResearchPublications/prb0510-e.pdf
im looking for things like, spanking, washing mouth with soap, locking bedroom door. Before anyone says something, I have only spanked a few times and he got soap once. locking bedroom is just being considered because time outs dont work he wont stay in a corner or in a chair or on a mat no matter how many times I take him back AND he gets physical like hitting & kicking if I try to pick him up or even take his arm and take him to his room. And he wont stay in he will just keep opening the door and slamming it or he will come out and stand just outside his door. Anyway, if anyone can help research I would REALLY appreciate it
Comments
I think I just found my answer though. No locking doors. so wont go there. well it says no locking in a room without adequate food, water or toilet. not that he would be in that long maybe 5-10 mins but either way we wont go there. it seems we cant do much of anything here in the way of punishment/discipline. looks like im back to square one. what do you do when a child is abusing the parent?? seriously when he hits and kicks me and leaves bruises wtf am I supposed to do?? sit there and take it???
I once made the suggestion to a friend to go on Judge Judy for a legal matter. She did and won.
Have you watched that show? I also believe she has a couple books on how to tame defiant behaviors.
A friend of mine has a very difficult 6yo, she took every single item out of his room other than clothes and bed and made him earn it all back... She had good results
I say turn him around and use the belt my mom would give us ten and an additional five if we squirmed or talked back
I know some won't agree hut hey it worked and I love my mom
Are persistent
Have lasted at least six months
Are clearly disruptive to the family and home or school environment
The following are behaviors associated with ODD:
Negativity
Defiance
Disobedience
Hostility directed toward authority figures
These behaviors might cause your child to regularly and consistently:
Have temper tantrums
Be argumentative with adults
Refuse to comply with adult requests or rules
Annoy other people deliberately
Blames others for mistakes or misbehavior
Acts touchy and is easily annoyed
Feel anger and resentment
Be spiteful or vindictive
Act aggressively toward peers
Have difficulty maintaining friendships
Have academic problems
Feel a lack of self-esteem
In addition, your child isn't likely to see his or her behavior as defiant. Instead, your child will probably believe that unreasonable demands are being placed on him or her.
I did some more research into the law code 43 for Canada's laws on discipline.
"The court found that the use of "reasonable" force to discipline children was constitutional. According to the federal Department of Justice, the test of reasonableness: "...involves an examination of a variety of factors including the age and character of the child, the nature of the child�s behaviour calling for correction, the degree and gravity of the punishment, and the circumstances under which the force was applied."
"2002-JAN-15: In its case #29113, the Ontario Court of Appeal upheld a lower court ruling which found that Section 43 of the Criminal Code of Canada is constitutional. The Government argued that allowing limited corporal punishment does not harm children, and that it "balances the societal interest in sustaining the family unit with the charter rights of the child."
REASONABLE FORCE in Canada is defined as
1. Reasons for the punishment: The parent must intend the punishment to be for "...educative or corrective purposes..." only.
2. Age limits for punishment:
The child must be capable of benefiting from the correction. Thus, corporal punishment of children under the age of two is not permitted. A parent who followed the advice of James Dobson -- child psychologist and founder of the fundamentalist organization Focus on the Family -- to use corporal punishment on an infant at the age of 18 months would be committing a criminal act.
"Corporal punishment of teenagers is harmful, because it can induce aggressive or antisocial behaviour."
3. Degree of punishment: It can result "...neither in harm nor in the prospect of bodily harm. This limits its operation to the mildest forms of assault."
4. Forbidden forms of punishment:
"Corporal punishment using objects, such as rulers or belts, is physically and emotionally harmful."
"Corporal punishment which involves slaps or blows to the head is harmful."
"Degrading, inhuman or harmful conduct is not protected."
According to Canadian law, what you described above as your use of discipline for your child is LEGAL. The door locking however, seems to be a safety concern to me. You know your child best, and while some may not "agree" with your choice of discipline, that is completely up to your discretion.
I really suggest getting some family counseling like I stated above. A child therapist can not only help your son immensely, but you as well. They can guide you into what your best course of action is with your son
I hope things get better for you. I KNOW how difficult this is. We went through the same things. Tried every punishment under the sun. What worked the best was positive reinforcement. The best discipline measure we found was having him sit or stand and hold his arms out in front of him for two to three minutes. Every time he would drop them, we would make him hold them back up. He thought it was fun in first 30 seconds! It was very effective. More so than corporal punishment.