my mother is piece of sh*t ( needs to vent )

firstmama

So I'm an only child who lives at home wit my mom in a two bedroom. I have my bf, she has hers. I use to smoke but since findin out I'm preggers I've had no cigs. Well her bf smokes but my mom doesn't. I said today not only does he have to start smokin in their room only, but also when my daughter comes he's going to have to stop smokin in the house period. She responds wit no, your grandparents smoked around u nd u came our fine. WTF!!!!! I wanted to smack dog sh*t outta her. She doesn't want him to be uncomfortable in his " house ". Smh I screamed that it sad that she cares more for his happines than her granddaughters health. Makes me sick. I'm so tempted to just move away n not let her be apart of our lives. Mind u this is her first grandchild.

4senough

Id be pissed, too. Maybe she just doesn't think there's any danger to baby. Get her some hard evidence, statistical reports, research by medical professionals, a letter from the dr, anything in writing that will show her the dangers of second hand smoke to a newborn. Keep your cool, take your feelings out of the situation as much as you can, and give it to her straight. If she doesn't change her mind, tell her the baby will NOT leave your room for any reason until the house is smoke free, and no one is allowed in your room with cigarettes. Good luck!

babynum2andproud

The smoke travels through the air ducts if she truly understood the danger she would stop even now because u shouldn't have to be exposed to that being preggers u could have a premie. Good luck and wish ya the best

adriens_mommy

my Mom won't quit smoking around me either it pisses me off I'm not smoking and it was hard for me to quit. at first i would want to smoke when i saw or smelled her smoke, then it started making me sick to smell it and she still won't quit around me! like when were in the car and i can't leave, ohhh it makes me mad!

naliibby2

Aghh I feel u.. Mii mom smokes allll uppp in the house! N doesn't care!!!!!! I've asked her many times!! Agh!!! So selfish.. Wish I could get out this house!! Grrr

firstmama

@naliibby2, @babyboyontheway @babynum2andproud @4senough
The sad part is its not her that smokes. Its her lowlife boyfriend. Ugh. I've given her the pamplets on smoking causing asthma, ear infections, emyphsema, and other issues. I've even gone so far as to go on google and print out pics of children with birth defects due to second hand smoking. She just doesn't listen. If she's goin to choose his happiness over her grandchild then I just won't let her be apart of our lives. Seriously.

ammasmama

I feel for you girls that have people smoking around you. Luckly when we found out we were pregnant my hubby started smoking outside and has since switched to the electronic cigarette that he only uses at work for stress.

But my monther in law doesn't listen. Its not that she smokes around my girls but we just found out that our 1 yr olds seizures are triggered by 3rd hand smoke. We ask that she doesn't smoke in the car on the way over and let herself airout, but she doesn't listen and then gets offended when we don't let her hug and kiss our daughter. And she still offers to watch the girls at her house which we have decided not to take the girls to anymore. I feel bad, cause I don't want to not let them see their grandchildren, but have respect when it comes to their health!

Nobosy understands how hard it is to keep our little girl away from 3rd hand smoke, I even have to ask that childcare at church is provided by nonsmokers or she can't go in. Its really hard.

FirstTimeDaddy

maybe u dont have to cut her outta ur life. but just move out sp ur baht won't b affected by second hand smoke

firstmama

@ammasmama I feel for u too. Wat gets me even madder is the fact that my grandma has been smokin for the over 40 yrs nd she's begun takin steps to quit so she can spend more time wit her great grand. It just hurts cuz my mom isn't even a smoker and I feel she should care more. My bf won't even smoke around me

firstmama

@firsttimedaddy I live in NYC. Where the price of a one bedroom even in a bad area is 1000. Don't hve that kind of cash. Were saving up to move out by dec but still as a grandmother she's disappointin me

ammasmama

That's awesome that your grandmother understands. I grew up around smoke, both my parents, they both quit after smoking for 40 years and now are both on oxygen. It kills me to know that they have taken years of their life away from me and my kids. They might see my oldest graduate, but I know they won't see my babies grow up! Its sad!

Maybe if you sat down with your mom and calmly talked about it. Let her know that you don't have any other place to go and would like it if he would at least smoke outside, its getting nice, so your not asking for too much for the health of her grandchild!

FirstTimeDaddy

yea I get u. I live w my gf n its not easy to raise a family financially. have u tom's her ur willing to take these, steps if she doesn't change