Go home or not...

Leggs2011

Ok this is a two part post..

First question: baby shower or welcome baby party?
We are stationed at Fort hood in TX. But we are both from the same town back in Northern IN..
I CAN'T decide to go home in the summer(june) for a baby shower or not. My cousin is having her baby girl late June. And if baby plays nice I should know the sex by then. So having the shower would be ok by then..

BUT my Brother plans to get married in Sept.(Not in IN) So then I will have to travel then too.. So money would be tight, though I do work.

Or should I just wait and have a welcome baby party after the baby arrives and after my husband deploys?(Could be between Nov to Jan) Baby is due in Nov..


Ok second question: Move home or stay here ALL alone?

I DO NOT get along with girls(Sorry I find most annoying, always have) So I have no friends here really. Just like 3 or so.

I really don't want to be alone the entire year he is deployed.. This is my first baby so I am really nervous being SO far away from home(18 hour straight drive).

I kind of want to go home, but I would have to get my mom or g-rents to sign my lease so that we don't loose any bah(for those who dont know, its our rent money)

I haven't talked to my husband about it b.c. he gets so frustrated about nothing.. And I don't want to bring it up just yet until I decide what I want to do.

I have NO capability to make up my mind.. I am really torn on what to do.. X_X

I asked on FB and some friends just want me to come home asap.. But thats just them wanting to see me.. So I figured I'd ask the ladies who it doesnt affect.. haha

Thanks!

paganmom

Well I can say this is a tough decision. I say if you need help w stuff for baby have a shower now...but money wise if you can swing it wait until after baby is born. And moving home hun I say family is sooo important. Being far away is tough and then your hubby being deployed and you alone!? If hubby agrees go home. And let the baby know your family get your help and enjoy your time. Then come back to base and be with your hubby.
Hope this helps....

salsabia

I only live an hour from my mom. Im about to move back to my home town and buy a house a couple blocks from my mom. She and I are not even that close but I can't imagine doing this alone.

Leggs2011

well I run a daycare so I do have some items.. And people can always have the gifts sent to me.


And I REALLY do want to move back home.. It just makes sense to me.. The only thing I hate to think about is paying for a uhaul, or paying the movers to take my stuff home, and then bring it back in a year..

I know I wouldnt want to drive back with the newborn. If Derek does deploy before I have the baby then I will def try to go home if tricare will let me.. But I heard that the army can be nice sometimes and let the husbands stay for some 'family time'.



Wow only an hour away from home??? I could DEF live that close/far from my mom.. My mom and I LOVE one another and we are bff's. But like many friends we fight if we spend to much time together.. haha.. So I def can't move in with her..

cetheridge

Imo stay where u are. We've been through 2 deployments and its easier to visit than live w family esp after ur so used.to running ur house ur way. We're from georgia and are in alaska hes deploying again this year and ill have our son (will be 6 and a newborn) and im staying put. The stress of moving, dealing with people,baby deployment and moving again all within the year outweighs baby and deployment stress. Again imo

Leggs2011

If I do move back home I def won't be living at anyones house. I will have my own home. Thats for sure.. It makes sense to stay since we just found a nice house to rent and we moved in last month.. But I know once I have the baby I will want to go home a lot and visit.. And with that said I would end up needing to stay at a family members house.. So tha their is more stressful to me.. Sleeping on the couch and worrying about my stuff.. And also worrying about people not getting their much needed sleep..

cetheridge

I rarely go home but thats just because people i went to school w still act like we're in highschool they live at bars and have their parents watching their kids. And expect me to be the same. The last 4 times i visited I didnt even tell anyone i was there. I'm a homebody and w my son being in school and myself being in college that kept me busy while he was gone.

MorgDeeBee

I'm moving back home during deployment which is supposed to happen about a month after I'm due. My husband and I had a long talk about it and decided for us its the best thing. But like I said that's what we thought was best for us. I don't know anyone out here and both of our families are back home. Most of his friends wives move during deployment

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MorgDeeBee

I know moving with a newborn and only being there for a little bit then moving again is gonna be a pain but in the end I think it'll be worth it. My mom has offered to help with the baby so I could go back to school.

Leggs2011

How did you bring it up to your husband?

I asked my sister in law to think about the possibility of her bf and the baby to move in with me if I move back. She lives with him in his parents house. They really want to move out but she has never had a job, she's 18 and I think he is too. So they really don't have much of an income. She said she would talk to him and tell me what they feel.

I also wouldnt mind living with my cousin who is about to have her baby in June. But I def would want her to leave the baby daddy(ONLY b.c. he is a pos and has been seeing her and his other baby mama at the same time for the past.. um. 4 years?) She just won't leave him.. So I couldnt deal with seeing her upset..