hes such a special person...vent

paganmom

Update on my bd. After threatening me he came to see me today out of the blue all bc I ignored his texts this morning. Now he wants to go back to checking in periodically which to him means every three months and told me that after the baby is born and is on a feeding schedule and knows her days and nights he will want to take her overnight. Also said he now wants to be in the delivery room. Mind you he lied to me about being married and has avoided me during this pregnancy at all costs. Even told me to stay away from his family...
Now I am a calm person but after four months of dating and a whoops pregnancy you eff me over so far my whole pregnancy. And now you want to tell me that after the baby is born we can work on our relationship and he will be very active w the baby. I told him I know three things about you. Everything else is unknown and my baby is going nowhere w u. You are a stranger. He responds by saying that our relationship will be so much better and it will work out just fine after the baby.
Mind you he is still living w his wife just bought a brand new suv and has given me zero money this whole time. I have had to support my household my seven yr old son w no child support and buy stuff for my child on one income! I don't care what he says. I want a lawyer to help me protect my baby. If he can lie to his wife right in front of me today about where he was this man can lie about anything. Can I keep him from seeing my baby and still have him pay support tricare and daycare? Or maybe have supervised visits at my house only? Please help.

gladiator007

Complicated. I don't think you can prevent him from having some shared custody w/o any merits like he's a danger to you or his lifestyle. You will get better idea once you see a lawyer about your rights. Best Luck!

paganmom

@gladiator007...I know..I am afraid of that. I have an appointment w a lawyer next week. Does a habitual liar give me merit?? Lol. Thanks for the reply. I am gonna need all the luck I can get.

momofSOONtobe7

Idk what state your in but I know here in ohio bd has rights as well. But the thing is they can't keep the baby until I think it's a year old. Don't quote me on that. I mean you could always not tell him when you have her and put no name on the birth very. But then again that's robbing the child from the bd. I would tell his wife she is entitled to know that her husband has a kid on the way and he needs to man it up and take care of his responsibility. In just a few states I know adultery is a crime so to speek. I wish ya luck.

paganmom

@momofSOONtobe7..I am in missouri and if I am right mother has major rights. A police officer told me I can withhold my child from him until courts make a decision bc we aren't married. I already told him he's not on birth cert. Or in delivery room. But the man keeps telling me he wants to be there. I also told his wife when I was four weeks along. He didn't have the balls to. But as far as I can tell they are still together. Which is whatever at this point just want him to stay away and pay like he should. I am six months plus along and he hasn't been here til now why start? Thanks for thw luck...lol. needed that before I got prego..lol

tbaby2011

Its something you have to talk to lawyer about cause I also live in Ohio and my hubby was told when trying to figure out stuff with his oldest that he has no rights unless they were married or he already went through courts for visitation!! And he still has to pay child support the system works certain ways for certain people but its different everywhere only a lawyer can help you with that. Wish you best of luck I have to get a lawyer to file for full custody of my daughter too cause my ex got married and his wife is "rough" with all kids and everytime my daughter would go stay with her dad she came back with new cuts or bruises so I stopped letting her go cause the last time she had a cut/ scab on back of her head the size of quarter! Just be careful and go through courts so he can't get around it. Good luck hun!!

momofSOONtobe7

Wow what a low life. Well in the hospital there is security so if you don't want him there they will keep him out. Id contact child support when the baby is born and im sure he will want a dna test done. And the only way he's going to be able to see the baby is if he goes to court and gets court ordered visitation. Once dna is established here is when dad has rights. But your right that mom has all say when your not married. Well sending ya wishes and luck!