Stuck...Need some serious advice! Long sorry!

BishopsMommy

So after this baby I hve 2 children a boy and a girl. To me this completes my family and I was SOOOSO determined to get my tubes tied.

My son is 3 years old and if from another relationship. My fiance loves Bishop, he treats Bishop like thats his son and does it proudly.

But he recently expressed to me that he DOES want a boy of his own. Him and his brother are the only 2 that can keep his family name, Hope, going. But he tells me this AFTER I convince my doctor to do the tying. As Im only 22 but I convonced him and the appointment has been made wven!
Please dont make my age the focus. I have serious reasons for doing so a baaad family history of cervical cancer early on is on of them.

I suddenly dont know what to do, I was so determined that I was done. And No attitude please but I dont wanttwo girls. I would LOVE 2 boys. But its only a 50-50 chance ahh.

I dont know what to do >.<

The pill and depo both failed for me and Ive heard SOOO many brutal stories about Mirina.

Help? :-\

lae3

well i think that its too perminant myself.. i dont ever want to get it done.. but im pretty sure this is my last.. lol #3.. and he/she came as a surprise.. but i know i wont regret it.. i never regret my babies.. they are my heart.. but if you want a b/c you dont have to worry about get the IUD para gaurd.. no hormones.. i had on for 5 years and it worked great.. i took it out cause i wanted a second.. but timing wasnt right for another 3 years and i got my sec boy.. i was going to get it after him but my clinic didnt proform so i waited got the pill instead .. till i could get an apt.. and ended up getting preg.. again.. lol.. but im getting it this time.. lol.. im prepared for the whole clinic issue so im already going to make the apt.. right after my babies born..

blissmarie23

I can see his point. Alot of guys want to carry on the family name. Plus 22 is really young to get ur tubes tied. Im surprised ur doc agreed.

mommyto1soontob2

Freeze some eggs and later have a baby. My friends mom did tht

MummyNumber3

I'm in the same kinda situation, me and my other half are about to have baby #3 and after this one we have decided to both be made infertile.. we only ever wanted 3.. now going to my app the doc was like your still young (also 22) you could end up changing your mind and regretting the decision and then not being able to go back on it so now its kinda got us both thinking. This will be my 3rd section and my body can't take much more especially as I'm having such a bad pregnancy this time round so now it makes ya think..

MummyNumber3

@mommyto1soontob2 can you get your tubes tied then later have the egg planted if you decide you want another?

BishopsMommy

@mummynumber3 yes you can

menemami

I'm in a similar situation. I have one boy and I'm now having my thrid child and know I have 2 girls and one boy. My hubby keeps hinting at one more to try for a boy of his "own". I think Tube tying is reversible if you change your mind. If you get them cut that's a different story. You should do what you want, but if you're reconsidering leave your options open and talk to your doc about other options in birth control maybe the nuva ring or something different then you have already tried.

BishopsMommy

@mummynumber3

Yea see my pregnancies BOTH put me on bedrest sick for 6 months even when medicated. I want to start my life I need school done I want to start my career.

I just feel bad I dont want my fiance to NOT have a boy but like I said what are tje chanes itll be a boy! Agh

BishopsMommy

@Menemami

Yup he wants his own boy not that he isnt happy with Bishop but I can see where he is coming from.

mommy_dr

Would your sons father let your man adopt him? If he would it would fix the last name part,

mommyto1soontob2

Yeah. Plenty of ppl get tied n have eggs froze and later get implanted and have kids. Personally my god mom, friends mom, one friend who needed one tube taken out they froze her eggs and used later when she needed to.

Carley

U can still start ur life. Just have the last kid down the road when things are in line with what u would like. I turned 32 yr and I'm just having my last. It wasn't planned but we did plan on trying this yr. I waited until I had a few more of my goals under my belt. Try BC something long term and get ur goals out the way. Make a goal to re evaluate in 5 yrs or so and see what happens. Good luck with ur decision.

BishopsMommy

@their_mommy

No theres NO chane in that and I would not allow it even as ex's we get along VERY well.

@carley

I thought of it, but a, I cant afford the cost of an IUD also, I had a friend who went through sooo any issues with her iud infections ect. So it scares me away. But I fuess it could be my only other option