anyone whos lost a child & expected another around their birth/deceased date?

momma_tiffay

I lost my first child to sids when he was just one day short of 7months old. 4months later I found out I was pregnant again, & my duedate was exactly 1yr from the day my son passed... it scared me! Luckily he wasn't born on that day but he was only 2weeks off. 3rd pregnancy, I was due 1month after my sons deceased date, but decided to come early landing 3days before that awful day 3yrs later. This year on October 22nd my baby would be turning 5yrs old if sids hadn't claimed him, & I am due with another little boy on October 18th. Maybe it's just coincidence, but sometimes it really scares me that I keep landing around those dates.

[Deleted User]

That is always nerve racking. This baby is due close to. Its brothers due date. Its hard not to think about it. I think though you maybe are just fertile in january for whatever reason.

tinka1326

Wow... I don't really know what to say as I havent experienced anything like this, but I think everything happens for a reason... maybe its just fates way of trying to make that terrible date in your life a happier one...

Jaime77

((hug)) I wouldn't like a new child born on my sons special days jan. 15_17th. But if it happens to u maybe it's a sign not to be sad on that day, momma

momma_tiffay

@ll10, how do you deal with it? Like I get such a nervous wreck towards the end of my pregnancies since it happens like this for me. & is it even possible to be more fertile at certain times of the year? Hmm, that would make me most fertile end of Jan & mid Aug - beg Sept. Two May babies, one October baby & another on the way.

@tinka1326, I like you're explanation for my stange coicidences. Sometimes I feel like my baby is watching over me making sure I don't forget him, but how could any mother ever forget their child? Ah, I'm a wreck.

momma_tiffay

@Jaime77, thanks. & I honestly would feel so awful if I had any of my babies on either of those days... maybe they're due so close to keep me strong & happy but it never fails that on those days I am completely miserable.

Jaime77

Me too hun.. Even after 9 years..

Jaime77

Me too hun.. Even after 9 years..

Jaime77

Me too hun.. Even after 9 years..

Jaime77

Ohh my lord, my cell sux! Lol sorry

[Deleted User]

I think women who have lost children will always be devistated on those days. I don't cope with it well I am a wreck on birthdays and due dates. I have nightmares about my water breaking constantly and sometimes I think I can smell that sweet smell of amniotic fluid when I go pee. Its scary but somehow we make it. My situation is much different than yours, but knowing that women who have lost children are out there makes me feel not so alone in my grief.

momma_tiffay

@Jaime77, I don't think anyone ever gets over it. How could we?

@ll10, if you don't mind me asking, what happened with your baby? Preterm labor/delivery? Knowing women who have lost children is definitely a plus when you need someone to talk to... we're really the only ones who can truely understand eachother.

@OregonMama, that's great that you can hopefully make it full term this time, good luck!

[Deleted User]

Yep I go into labor at 4.5 months. Its true. I don't think anyone realizes how many women deal with something like this until it happens to them.

LaFiiTz89

i had a m/c on sept 28 n im now due sept 29...freaked me out too

tinka1326

I truly feel for all the women who have lost their children. I had a mc back in December but was only a few weeks along so the devastation I felt was totally different to what is felt by women who have carried their children much longer or lost a child after the birth. I don't know how you women are so strong.

[Deleted User]

With my second pregnancy we were due decemer 6th. (With my first i was due january 6th) Went in for my routine 11 week scan....no heartbeat that was mothers day weekend, friday may 7, 2010. my first mothers day of being a mommy to our first daughter, I lost a baby. They were backed up in surgery so couldn't do my D&C until Monday, the day after mothers day. With my now 1 month old, I was due june 6th....just less than a month past that horrible day. I had her june 3rd but once that day hit, I was dead to the world. The pain never goes away or gets better. Its always hard when I think about it. I always say, why me? Why us? We aren't bad parents, so why?

5lilangels

I had miscarried on nov 27 07 thanksgiving day my due date with Leila os nov 4 th 2011 ahhhh

mummytuube

M/c 7th nov 08 due 9th nov 2011

alilboulding

I had a mc on Halloween in 2009. N now I'm due on Oct 30th. I think it's a blessing..n that it's kinda coming full circle.

momma_tiffay

@ll10, do the drs know why it happened? there's nothing to prove what causes sids, i constantly wonder if theres somthing i could have done differently... although i know that i did the best that i could.

@LaFiiTz89, how are you handling it? i start freaking out everytime those dates would get closer during my pregnancies.

@tinka1326, loss of a child is hard no matter when it happens. from the day you find out you're pregnant you begin a connection with your child. for me, i feel very lucky to atleast have met my child & had a few months with him. but losing him will always affect me, especially on the days i had & lost him.

@MommyOfTwoPrincesses, i'm sorry that your first mothers day was such an awful experience for you. i'm a little shocked all the stress didn't put you into labor, honestly i think that's what happened with my last pregnancy... it was too close to the day i lost my first, there was no medical evidence to suggest otherwise. i fond myself wondering the same things, at the end of the day you just have to know that you did all that you could.

@5lilangels, what an awful thanksgiving. luckily there was no way your baby would have stalled out birth until that day, but still close enough.

@mummytuube, as much as it freaks me out, i feel like when this happens to us, it's proof that it's our second chance.

@alilboulding, very trueGH!

LaFiiTz89

Its not bothering me actually..cuz im happy im having a healthy baby. It would be weird if i have him on the 28 but im pretty sure thats not gonna happen since hes big n im measuring 2 weeks ahead..also the 28 of every month is my weddi g anniversary so when i lost the baby it was very hard. I felt like we werent meant to be together cuz we lost the baby on that day

[Deleted User]

They think they know why But I am not sure they are right. I wonder the same thing all of the time there are so many thungs I could of done differently. Its hard to keep faith that we did all we could. but I know we did.

mamiRaquel

I'm very sorry for your loss....in 05 I thankfully had a healthy boy.....I got pregnant again in 2007 only to miscarriage November 11. I got pregnant again the next year and delivered November 11, 08 but he passed away from a heart defect....I am now prego again after waiting some time n my due date is November 7. It's kinda freaky but.....I know that the month of November will always for ever be a special month. Good luck to u n think positive

uh_Lyss_uhh

My son passed 3 days after his 4 month mark. I'm pregnant again now after waiting 2 years but no where near his date. But last month was his angel day & being pregnant I find it somewhere easier & closer to him through his little sister. Sorry for your loss & I do know your going through. Extremely hard. I'm here if you needa talk

kailiasmomma05

I have had 4 miscarriages but none of my.living children where due near their due dates or date of passing. My my son who is my husbands first child was born on july 31 which is the day hubbys lil bro died of sids so it was tough on the mother in law and we were very scared history may repeat itself but praise god it didnt

misskristin

Sorry for your loss hun. I had a m/c in Sept 10, although I was only 9 weeks, I had to have a d&c. I found out I was pregnant again in Jan and was due on the day I had the d&c. I ended up m/c again at 5 weeks. I was sad near the end of April as our 1st baby was due on the 28th. Hubby and I had decided that April would be our last ttc month for a while, guess God had plans as I am 12 weeks today and the baby has a strong heartbeat, but I'm still nervous sometimes that something will go wrong. This lil bean is due 3 days before my sons birthday, but I'm hoping he/she comes a little sooner.

brodysmamma

That's Kinda odd and I am sorry you had to go through that. My baby is due around my moms birthday my first edd was on my moms death anniversary (her bday and anniversary are just weeks apart.) so I Kinda understand how you feel but its my mom not my child. I have a feeling though my baby will be born on my moms birthday just a few days before my actual due date. I am going to try and make it a special day if he is born that day. If you need to talk im here. I know we are not close on pregly but feel free.

Tanners_Mommy

I'm due this time 28 days after my first son was due. He was a still born in may last year so he didn't make it till august like he was supposed to. If that counts.