Mother too overwhelming

heatherlynn

So I'm 25 and this is my first baby and my mothers 1st grandchild and she is being way too overwhelming for me. She has bought the crib, bassenet, swing, bouncy seat, tons of clothes (my baby dresser is full and I haven't even had the babyshower yet). I have not gotten to pick out anything really. She wants to be around all the time and tell me what "were" gonna do when he's here and so on...I am not ungrateful but this is my first child ya know? I am blessed to have someone helping me, but when I try to tell her to stop buying so much or if I try to tell her not to buy something because its too much or I want to pick it out, she brushes it off as if I'm joking. I can imagine when the baby is here she is going to want to hold the baby before my boyfriend and I don't know how to tell her that that isn't acceptable to me, without her getting offended. Anyone have a mother like this? How should I deal with this?

MrsHudson10

I think you should express to her that you appreciate the help and you definitely want her involved with your pregnancy but explain that you want to be able to decide what is bought for your child. I don't think its acceptable for her to expect to hold the baby before your bf either. On that subject you need to be gentle but firm. She needs to know before you even go into labor what

MrsHudson10

U think about that so that when the time comes there wont be any issues. I know its hard because its ur mom but better to nip it now than to wait for it to get worse. Good luck!

heatherlynn

Ahh I know...I have talked to my dad about it and he understands..I just don't want to offend her. I need to address it before its too late...I need to find a way to eaaaaase into the conversation lol

BabyMcBride8_27

Oh my God, that sounds like my mom all over again! I just kinda told her in the nicest way possible that she was starting to drive me nuts. She understood, and has calmed down since.

MrsHudson10

I guess I didn't really care about hurting my moms feelings because I knew she'd get over it. She started trying to dictate what I was and want going to do (i.e. Finding out the gender, the names we chose she says I HAD to change them because she didn't like them) I rld her flat out "mom I love you, but this isn't your kid and I WILL do what I want, and you'll just have to get over it." She's chilled out a lot since.