how do i make him...Seriously?!?

jazzi89

More sympathetic?? My bf hs no sympathy for me. He says I complain too much and that being preg isn't that rough. Well I'm on bedrest and taking meds to stop conractions so he thinks I'm able to do housework again. I don't min cleaning but our house is a mess right now because he moved some stuff from upstairs to downstairs. And he's like so ru gonna clean tonight so I ca come home to a spotless house?...ugh its hot as fuck here and I have a houseful of dogs and I didn't get to sleep til almost six this morning and was up by 10 cuz his dog was barking. I've tried talking but he's just not getting it...

KrazymomofAdrian

Kick him in the balls 10 times then say now clean. Lol

BeautifulOne

I'm sorry to say that he probably won't be. He will never be able to understand how you feel and what your going through so he probably will never get it. I hope things get better though.

blueberrysmom

You can't make someone care, unfortunately.

jazzi89

I like my house lol id be on the streets if I did that lol

jazzi89

Great so its hopeless ugh

rckprincess2

Tell him to clean the house his damn self. I did that to my dh. I refused to clean and didn't clean or cook for a wk straight. He's more considerate these days. He still has his bleh days were he comes home after I guess a bad day and wants to be all bitchy. We get things straight right quick. I clean every single day and cook supper every single day. If I don't get to a specific task that day doesn't mean I'm just going to leave it -_-

KrazymomofAdrian

Well thats what they say giving birth is most compared to. I don't think you can make him understand. Don't put your body under any stress. It can be really bad if your supposed to be on bedrest stay on bedrest.

jazzi89

Ya he works 80+hrs a week so all he does is work and sleep. I'm supposed to keep the house clean. He went on a bitch fit last night in frontof his mom about how he can't sleep because he has to clea the house and blah blah I almost walked out. His mom n little sister r coming over tonight to helpa little. I'm trying to stay on bedrest but getting pu down every day for being a slob is getting to me

VictoriaB

Have your doctor set him straight. Bedrest means just that. REST!!!! Or maybe have his mom set him straight. Either way, he doesn't need to be a whiner.

jazzi89

my dr just said to take it easy and said i can do minimal things and if i take my meds i have to stay in bed. his mom isnt going to say anything to him, shes afraid of him i think. no one really tells him hes wrong ever, they just agree with him or change topics

JesseDenver

He sounds like a spoiled little brat..lol..sorry that you get treated this way under your condition. If it was me, I would just tell him I am in too much pain to do that much housework and it's the doctor's order to take it easy. I understand he works a lot and is probably tired when he gets home but being pregnant is no picnic! Assure him that things will get better once the baby gets here and you are back to normal. Hope this helps!

txmoorekat

It's one thing for him to expect you to clean the house, but it's another thing for him to expect it at the cost of your or your baby's health. Would he rather you be on bedrest in the hospital? He'd have to do the cleaning then anyway.

valentinasmommy

I would have a fit. If you're on bed rest that's what the hell it means. That's ga. Tell him to clean the house. If I was on a bed rest I wouldn't do nothing. He would be asses out. I'm complaining too much? O well. You do it.

KrazymomofAdrian

From what you just said he sounds like a major dick. He works a lot but his mom fears him :O thats a little nuts. I'm sorry but he won't get set straight.

dra765

Try doin a lil a day n eventually it will b done n you'll just have the little bit a day

jazzi89

his mom and sister just came over and helped me clean the whole downstairs. they dont want me to say they did it so hell get off my back for a while. and hes not spoiled really, just has an extreme temper, or had an extreme temper. hes never went off on me but ive heard stories. and yes i am trying to do a little each day and trying to pick up after myself right away.

jazzi89

ugh im done! i just got off the phone with my bf and told him he better be happy because i cleaned the entire house. and hes like "uh thanks i guess, but that shit should be done everyday, idk why your making a big deal out of it..." really?!? ugh im on bedrest and i just cleaned his whole house. with help of course, but he doesnt know that. ugh! im at a loss for words, im pissed, but hurt at the same time. he didnt even care, all he said was that i should be doing that kindof stuff everyday. omg im about to flip out on him!

mrs_shu

The only thing that may help him "see" is hearing it from your doctor. And even that may not work cuz he'll probably say you told him to say it..people just don't get that every woman and pregnancy is different. If you(not specifically you) can't work, someone will turn around and say well so and so worked till birth!
I can't deal with tying the garbage up, I gag violently and sometimes throw up..my husband doesn't understand but ties it up anyway and my 13 yr old says I'm being dramatic.

blueberrysmom

Hire a housekeeper to come clean once a week. Maybe a teenager from your neighborhood would do it for cheap. If you're on bedrest you should not be cleaning, ya know.

jazzi89

@mrs_shu ya i told him that i shouldnt b the only one cleaning especially when im picking up after him too and hes like well i work and im tired, and i replied well i feel like shit everyday and my pills make me drowsy. and hes like ya well most preg girls have jobs, you dont. i was pissed. i lost my job because of med problems (i almost lost my baby girl) and he just wont let it go that im unemployed. just because i dont work doesnt mean im not tired at the end of the day. ugh. @blueberrysmom ya his little sister and mom are going to b coming over once a week while hes gone to help me out a little

lae3

yeah im with blueberrysmom on this one.. hire someone who would be willing to do the basics for real cheap.. a teen.. i used to clean for cheap.. does he ever go to your ob apts.. if not he needs to go to one.. so he knows how important it is to keep your baby safe inside your womb as long as possible.. hes a jerk.. sorry.. but im getting irritated at the treatment.. i tell my man .. if its bothering you so bad .. than you need to clean it .. cause im not going to risk our childs life and well being to please you.. your not worth it.. sorry.. but hes not..

jazzi89

@lae3 ya he goes to all the appts. he really just thinks im being a baby though and complaining to the dr so he keeps me on bedrest and what not. well im not, im on meds to stop contractions, my dr wouldnt prescribe those to me for no reason. i cant handle fights so i just give in and b like ok whatever you say, ugh this just sucks. i wish i had a normal preg so this wouldnt b goin on

lae3

you are almost done girl.. just think of it that way.. you could go into labor in about 3-4 weeks and baby should be safe .. and hopefully unassisted.. after all youve been through.. whats a few more wks.. i hope that make you feel better.. :X

jazzi89

@lae3
its been a long hard pregnancy but it is almost done. ya im anxious for her to come. im so glad im almost done. maybe having his daughter will change him.

lily_glz

Ugh my hubby is the complete opposite! I'm nesting and he wont let me do anything! He'll let me clean for like 5 min then he says I need to sit down and rest lol.. wanna trade? Lol.. my hubby is sweet but sometimes I wanna choke him idk how he'd act if if I was on bedrest! But like all the other ladies said you really can't male him care

lae3

god i hope so.. for your sake.. he will probably always be demanding.. but at least you wont be on bedrest.. lol.. but he will most likely appreciat you after seeing the process i know my man did.. lol..

Excitedtobe

Uh I'm mean really mean a great actress ... I would tell him I lost the baby. See his reaction and then be like if I clean asshat that's what will happen so if you love me and the baby then you will hire someone

jazzi89

@lily_glz I would glady trade for atleast a day lol. My bf used to b that way in the beginning and when I would get out of the hospital but now he's not. @lae3 ya I hope so too. I hope it'll change him for the better. Although his mom is worried because he has a short fuse and idk how well he's gonna handle having a nb in the house. Blah

jazzi89

@Excitedtobe he would leave me if I pulled something like that...

eaparker

Tell him he can either have a clean house or a healthy baby. U will do what u can but don't expect miracles.