DH having some moments of difficulty.....

Cantwait2BAMommy

So I think my man is feeling the pressure of ttc. I'm trying not to talk about it much but he needs to know when I'm fertile. Sometimes when the need for a "fill up" is due, he has some difficulty finishing the deed. Im supposed to ovulate saturday but hes leaving today and will be gone til sunday. We had sex yesterday morning and night but I sure hope his little guys hang around long enough til sunday. And hopefully we can get one more in on sunday. Any advice in the DH department?

sas_edwards

Uh! I need help too! We normally have sex ALL the time but this is our fist month to really ttc and we haven't had sex in a week! Its so weird and like there's an elephant in the room. I think we're both nervous about how serious it is. Its so frustrating! I am in the saaaame boat. I think they do have to feel a lot of pressure.

vette_devil

Mine was the same way, so I just stopped 'talking' about it & just kept initiating sex regularly, not just when 'the time was right'... he quit stressing out about it & just enjoyed the "extra attention" ... lol... and sperm can live for up to 5 days, so don't stress out & don't freak him out by pushing for 2-a-days until then... I've never done it more than once a day while ttc & got preggers the first month both times. Good luck!

sands3

My husband is kind of doing the same. He can still finish but he says I'm not making it fun by talking about it. I've been trying not to as much. Maybe if you don't tell him its fertile times and just do it...it will happen. Hope that helps a little.

kayleigh27

My husband was the same way. I would ask him if there was anything stressing him but he would always deny it. Wasn't until I finally got pregnant that he admitted that he alway thought of sex as a job to get me pregnant and not pleasure. We would just try to do a lot of foreplay and I would try to make it spontanous for him. It kinda helped him but there was still a lot of.mental stress

VictoriaB

Ugh. I hate it when guys act like its a chore. Luckily, my hubby really wanted to have a baby too. I read that if he keeps thrusting after he cums, then it can actually scoop out up to 90% of the sperm. Its some weird evolutionary thing. Anyway, I told my hubby to push as deep as he could when he came and then pull right back out. I also layed with a pillow under my butt. I guess you're supposed to do it for 20-30 minutes, but I only did it for like 5. I'm impatient and I felt like a dork doing it The most important thing to do is relax and don't stress it! Good luck!

Cantwait2BAMommy

My husband would know my fertile days even if I didn't tell him. He is not the type of guy that is super horny either so most of the time I have to initiate sex. We probably do it like 2 or 3 times a month so if I was to not think about fertile days and ovulation, we probably would never get pregnant. I usually initiate sex without even saying I'm fertile and I am also not that much of a horny girl..lol....so I think it's kinda obvious when we have sex that "its time to try." My husband is the one who was pushing to start earlier to ttc so I dont understand why it's so hard for him to perform. I think we need to not feel that us ladies are all the blame though. Sometimes they just need to relax.

Cantwait2BAMommy

@victoriab.....its not the act that I dont get. Its getting him arroused on my fertile days without having him stress about it.

vette_devil

I didn't say YOU can't know when the right time is, lol!... my husband IS a super horndog- *snort*- but he even said it felt 'different' & 'stressful'... just having sex for 'fun' at other times seemed to take the edge off of it for him- good luck!

Cantwait2BAMommy

Haha, my DH is not the horny type and I'm not really either, so I hope he just gets his mind to a place that is comforting for him. He wants this baby just as much as I do.