Rights

lmd18taw

I was 5 months pregnant when me and the baby daddy got married. We have been married 2 months and he has been so hateful the whole pregnancy. I was to the point of going into depression because of the way he was treating me and also being on bedrest. I have made up my mind to get a divorce after talking to a therapist and her telling me he is being emotionally abusive. He thinks he deserves all rights to our daughter that isn't even born yet. I plan on breastfeeding and he won't respect my wishes of her not spending much time away from me for the first year so she can be breastfeed. Since I got pregnant before we got married and I'm not putting him on the birth certificate is he entitled to all rights with her? He doesn't have the money to fight for custody and I plan on denying a paternity test.

Junebuggbabie85

you would both have to sign an affidavit of paternity if you are already divorced before the baby comes if you don't sign it he doesn't get any rights but if you are still married when baby is born he may be able to claim rights but you can always fight it in court

lmd18taw

Im 30 weeks pregnant and hoping baby doesn't come before the divorce is final. I just want it where I have all rights so i get to make all the decisions.

Junebuggbabie85

And instead of a divorce try for an annulment on the grounds of abuse. That way its like the marriage never existed and he has absolutely no rights

lmd18taw

I think we have to get divorced because of the baby according to the lawyer, but I don't understand why when the baby was not during the marriage.

Junebuggbabie85

I don't think you should have to you got pregnant before getting married. Usually if you get pg after getting married you have consummated the marriage and therefore cannot get it annulled.and if the lawyer tries to tell you that because of the baby being his you have to get divorced maybe tell them it might not be his.

lae3

U dont have to have him on the bc.. But if he pettitions u , and court orders a dna test.. By law u have to provide it

lmd18taw

So I guess I need to talk to my lawyer again about annullment. We have until September 11 to get the annullment. I wish stuff like this was easier.

Junebuggbabie85

Yeah but if it was easier people would rush into and oout if marriages with reckless abandon. I hope everything works out for you, and if nothing else once you are no longer married you could always just tell him its not his child any way then he might not want any rights. (not saying its not his or whatever ) just sometimes you have to fight slime with slime

lmd18taw

Yeah. Im hoping if I do have to fight then I'll be granted full rights anyways because of him being abusive. I just want whats best for my little girl and making a mistake with him was bad enough. I just wish he would leave me alone.

AKmommy

Technically it is his baby too and even if it wasn't because you're married it is automatically his child. I completely understand why you would want her to be close for breast feeding but you should still allow the father in her life. Its not the babys fault that it didn't work between you too. He could turn out to be this amazing father so its something you should think about. As much as it sucks since things didn't work between you guys is no reason to have a daughter not have her father. Now if he turns out to be a bad father then that is different, but he still has rights just like you. I wouldn't have wanted my mother to not put my fathers name on the bc just bc their relationship didn't work. Being the mother shouldn't mean someone should get complete rights as the child has a father. I hope everything works out for you and the baby I hope this didn't offend you, I don't/ didn't mean too just speaking my mind a little

lmd18taw

I understand. I want him to be a part of her life I just want control because of how he is. He thinks he should have all control and he threatens me everyday with her. He wouldn't even take care of me so I don't see how he would take care of a baby. He has a personality flaw where he doesn't care about anything but himself and he doesn't care about her well being at all he just wants to control her. I just want to be able to decide whether she sees him or not due to when he is nice or having the time period where he gets mad at everything.

Junebuggbabie85

I think with safety being a concern the courts should work with you and if you want him in her life then maybe supervised visitation is the answer due to his abusive and controlling nature.