12 weeks since Caleb.
So ladies I really didn't know where else to go, my fb dosnt seem right since so many people are wither tires of me talking about loosing by son or they don't say anything because they don't know what to say to me. Its been 12 weeks since I had Caleb who passed away on the day of his birth, I was 20w5d. It was confirmed by my new ob dr that we lost our first born due to in incompetent cervix. I'm writing this morning because my love and I have been trying again and while we are hoping it won't take 10 months like it did before. Its getting to the point where all the girlfirends I have who were pregnant while I was and we were due all round the same time are starting to have their babies. I'm happy, hurt, upset frustrated everything right now. I tired for 7 years with my ex husband and ended up having 2 mc. One at 5w & the other at 6w, now with loosing Caleb I feel like, " whens it finally goings to be my turn?" My arms are empty all I've ever wanted was to have kids, I'm a responsible adult I work a good full time job I have a good home >my extra room is still set up as a nursery < closed off to the outside world now. I don't know what to do or feel any more, I'm actually tired of having hope that I will be called " mom" by a child of my own. I catch myself at world replaying the night I had Caleb over and over again things I should of said to him, I should of held him longer I should of taken mote pictures etc. Please ladies I guess what I'm really asking is please send me some baby dust I could really use the in extra boost. Thank you all and I hope the best for all of you. Xoxoxo baby dust and rainbow love to all of you.
Comments
and *lots of hugs* for you xox
and *lots of hugs* for you xox