am i overreacting?

mommyo3soon2b4

I had my baby shower last weekend and only half the people who rsvp'd showed up and only 2 small things ere purchased off my registries. My sister came and brought us a pack n play that she had purchased for her step-granddaughter...it Was supposedly never used, but she put it together before coming and noticed that it was dirty. It was obviously used, but honestly I didn't care. I can clean it and this is baby #4...we love hand me Downs. Anyway she also gave us a card that had written in it that she was giving us a $100 shopping card. She then pipes up after I opened and read the card, that she gets to go with me for sisterly shopping time...so she is keeping the card till we get to go....ummmm OK.
Here's the thing....I have a home daycare and recently lost 3 kids from one family, so my income sucks right now and since I'm scheduled for my c-section in 45 days I can't fill my spots. So...we are obviously stressed out and not sure how to pay all our bills with just my hubby's income. She offered to help us out because we have helped her many times. Well then instead of helping she said we should just move so our rent is cheaper...we said that's not really an option as we are in a lease, we already squeeze a soon to be family of 6 into a 1700 sq ft house, and it takes a ton of $ to move. Well now she is treating us like we are irresponsible. We made plans to go shopping this Saturday and she is like "make a list of the items Maddox truly needs". Uhhhh...okay...but you said you were giving us $100 to shop for him. Not that we are going to blow it on frivolous things, but she is making what was given to us as a gift into her controlling us like we are teenagers. Oh and did I mention that the "new" pack n play is broken??? I asked for the paperwork that came with it, so we could see about ordering a replacement part and she treated me like I was ungrateful. I am so upset over the way she is treating us that I almost don't want to go "shopping" with her. Am I overreacting or does it sound a little off?
***sorry this was so long***

sunshinelove

I dont think you are over reacting... I honestly would be extremely upset myself, and probably let her know some how while trying to be polite. Cuz thats really really lame of her.

mommyo3soon2b4

@sunshineinlove thanks! My hubby and best friends agree with me, but I'm fat and preggo and they don't like to rock the boat! Lol:)

Rissalee7

I think u have every right to be upset just like i have every right to be mad my dad didnt give me a gift at my shower, and this maybe his like 6th grand kid but the only one that livees in the same state

mrs_shu

I don't think you're overreacting. Gifts are not meant to have strings attached.Plus its ridiculous for her to think you can just pack up and move..even if your landlord would be willing to let you break the lease without it costing you..that's still first/last/security you have to come up with it in a short amount of time, not to mention renting a truck and making sure the bills are still paid etc and in doing all that you can't exactly have the day care kids in the mix of packing..YOU certainly are limited to what you can do so that leaves most likely just your husband which will take longer even if he has friends to help..
And believe me I understand hand me downs lol this is baby #5 for us(hubby has 2 with ex) and they're ALL girls so there's plenty of hand me downs in our family lol BUT a broken pack n play? And trying to pawn it off like its new or barely used? Ugh! You'd be better off hitting up Craigslist and yard sales.

mommyo3soon2b4

@rissalee holy cow that sucks!!! This is your first baby right?

Pinkigirl

That doesn't sound like over reaction. I would be mad too! It was a gift not a lesson! Shes treating you like a child, not someone having a child. I don't know if id be as calm as you. I might be angry about it

Mama_luvs_her_girls

I would be upset just like you and honestly I wouldn't go. A gift is a gift and it doesn't matter what you spend your card on it is yours to spend. She should have given it to you and just left it at that. I'm sorry that happen and your feelings are justified

Rissalee7

@mommyo3soon2b4 Yeppers first but definitely not last

mommyo3soon2b4

@Mrs_shu the majority of our sons wardrobe is from Craigslist, as is his swing. We also hit up a ton of yard sales and resale shops and were blessed with hand me Downs from daycare families. I am the easiest person yo please...but this is just How she has always been. I can't even count the number of times we have helped her but I would never throw that in her face. It just hurts me that she still treats me like a baby rather than an adult woman who has been married for over 10 years with an amazing family...compared to her getting ready to get a 2nd divorce and already living with her new boyfriend with plans to get married. Ugh...its so frustrating!

mommyo3soon2b4

@pinkigirl I hate conflict but I'm not sure how I will handle it tomorrow if she starts criticizing me. I might need bail money!
@mama_luvs_her_girls thank you! Hopefully she will prove me wrong tomorrow and it will be fun. I so don't need anymore stress!