my limits have been reached!

In November my Aunt(not biological but has been in and out of my life since day one) became homeless. It was a very bad situation. My husband and I talked about it and allowed my Aunt to stay for a month. What is family for if not to help eachother right. Here it is January... she is still sleeping in the baby's room. She has a dog that is peeing on the floors and even on our couch! She smokes and puts her smoke covered clothing on baby's swing, blankets, crib! She allows my kids and the boy I babysit to do anything they want! She will allow them to eat a box of Twinkie that last my family a week in one day (just did this yesterday). I have lost control of my own home! She barrows our car and doesn't even give us the respect of a phone call when she isn't going to be back. I have 3 boys in school I NEED our car to do drop offs, pick ups, and unexpected errands. She pays no bills, no gas, no groceries, and I don't work so my husband carries the full load. I filled out her apartment application, turned it in, I have looked for her a vehicle, clean constantly behind her, spend twice as much time discipling the kids n animals, I am wore out! My new son is due the 27th and I have to have my home back to normal! How can I have a new baby with the stress of an adult child hanging around!? Sorry it's long and pointless but if I didn't get it out I would blow up!

Comments

  • I say she needs to go, tell her nicely that she has a week to figure something out. You have a new baby coming and that is a big enough change for a family and kids with out adding extra stress.
  • @My2Boys oh Lordy we have tried to. She knows how we feel and the tension is undeniable. I honestly think this is going to be a mess. My daddy tells me "no good deed goes unpunished" and now I understand.
  • @mommyof4boys ... Well you definitely need your house back. House guess tend to destroy the chemistry of the house. I think 6 months of a free ride is looooong enough for a grown ass person.

    Telling her she has to go will be hard but it needs to be done.
  • She needs to straighten up or start packing. i would make her leave. shes lucky that you let her into your home but shes over stepping her boundries
  • @kayleigh27 whelp she needs to pack... our c-section was moved up to 24th so I have a week n 6 days to remove her smell of smoke n dog from the baby's room! My husband found dog mess in his car from her taking the car with the dog. He now has to have it detailed before the baby's seat is installed! My daddy came and steamed the couch to remove odors while I was at the doctors. It is just crazy... I have 3 boys and 3 dogs plus babysit a 2 year old boy and we have a cat but our livingroom carpet n furniture never had hair, stains, or bad smells! Our pets aren't allowed on the couches and have pillows to lay on. Our kids are only allowed food and drink at the table. A 50 year old woman and her mut are ruining it! Coffee, smoke, and dog piss are what I smell. I miss smelling the apple cinnamon! Humiliated to have company in my own home :(
  • Omg I so understand Wat ur goin thru my bro an sister n law lived wit us for a year wit their big dog an it was horrible there was def tension an they did not pick up after thereselves did not pay bills an did not buy Grocerys an had to use my car an stayed in my sons room !!! I'm praying for u cuz I so no how u feel good luck to u :)
  • Oh wow. well now because of all that smoke and dog waste its becoming a health issue for the baby. you've helped her for awhile and she should have been looking for a job or a new place to live if she was doing all that driving around in YOUR car. its sad that some people cant be a little apprecitive
  • My sister is living in a homless shelter with her 2boys because she has burned all her bridges with family because she ruins everyones homes.

    me and my mom were renting a house that had just been completely gutted and remoldeled. After a yr my mom let my sister move in. Well it got completely fucked up. By time we moved the whole house needed to be gutted. The walls had holes from her kids the carpet had koolaid, pop, milk, juice, coffee, you name it. Not to mention food, so the bugs were outrageous. She never cleaned up after her kids or herself. It was disgusting.

    well we all ended up moving. I got my place place and my sister got her own again. My mom went to live with my uncle. Well they had to fix my sisters br one day so i let her and her kids stay for one night. Not even 24hrs and my apartment was trashed. There was food in my carpet. My sink was filled with dishes. It was horrible. Keep in mind that she came at 9pm and left by 10am.

    Well my mom took my nephew cause he kept running away. Then i took my niece because my sister was living month to month not knowing where she was gonna live. And her youngest stayed with his dad at the time. Well my sister started her drama with her youngests dad and ended up with her son back. She lost her home and started staying with a friend.

    After 2wks there, police escort. So she went to another friend. After 2wks, police escort. Then my mom sent my oldest nephew back because he was acting horrible, and i mean he needs to be back in the psych ward. Well anyways, this guy that's in her class at the jr college let her and the boys stay there. They got into a fight, she got police escorted and now she lives in a homeless shelter with her 7yr old and 3yr old.

    During the day she was spending time at my brothers until she got into a fist fight with my sil about her leaving the house trashed and not cleaning up after the boys.

    I did end up losing my place in july when bd became a douche and left and wouldn't pay rent. But i went to my uncles. No problem. He had an extra room that i share with my baby. And my son and niece share a room with my cousin. He never complains about me here but refuses my sister because how she acts.

    Here's the great part about the shelter: she's been there 3months atleast. She's getting kicked out of there next month because she has made no affort to help herself. She wont look for a job because McD and Walmart and places like that are beneath her. Sorry bitch but your homeless and got kids, it is not beneath you. She's trying to get my niece to come live at the shelter with her. I think not. My niece has a bed here and i buy her everything she needs. She goes to school. I will not allow her in that situation.

    The point of the story is sometimes you just have to push them out and hopefully they'll learn. In the case of you "aunt", i think its time for a notice that she needs to leave. She's overstayed her welcome.
  • Yeah my hubby let her know time was up. He let her know she has a week so he has the 6 days to clean the baby's room... which now entails steaming carpets, washing all his bedding, clothes, and swing seat! Redoing things we did less than 2 months ago! I'm taking some comfort in knowing I'm not the only person that had a rude house guest over stay their welcome! Sorry you all dealt with it and glad you now have your space back!
  • Kick her out. I wouldn't even feel bad if thats how she is treating your house!
  • I've totally been here, but with my own mother! She left my extremely abusive stepfather. my husband and I later figured out that she left simply because none of us (her children) lived either at home or close enough to suffer his abuse to keep it off her. My electric bill went up from 200 dollars to almost 500, and my grocery bill went up to almost 300 a week! She would feed my dog off the table as in let him jump in her lap and eat off a plate! And put my cat on the table and counter tops. She was a utter and total slob because it wasn't her house and she literally told me "i've been your father's maid for 15 years, I can leave a mess for a while."
    I put up with it for two years until I was so stressed that I wasn't sleeping because I couldn't finish my work until 4 am. I never saw my hubby because he worked two jobs to make ends meet while she blew her rent money on random crap. My son ate her pills twice because she just left them where she pleased. The last time and last straw was blood pressure medicine. If I hadn't seen the bottle I may have lost him. She said the same apologies and whining that my son was too undisciplined about her medication (he was just turned 2!!) I told her to get out. Exactly like that too.I told her to get out in a week or I'd throw her crap out into the yard and she could sleep in the barn. She lasted 2 months on her own before she went back to my stepfather. I haven't spoken to her since she moved out and definitely won't speak to her as long as she remains with that abusive child molesting POS.
    all I can say for you is to stop being nice. You don't owe her anything, especially since you have sacrificed so much to try to help!
    Secondly..buy krud kutter. It is sold at Lowes or home depot in the cleaning materials aisle. It comes in a gallon jug concentrated and will literally clean up anything and everything! I used it in my carpet cleaner to remove dog crap, dog and cat urine, ink, hair dye, ground in dirt etc. Good luck!
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