HELP ALL MOMS who had babys over 20-24 weeks that didnt make it

ripKaydenceripKaydence
edited January 2012 in Loss
i was just informed that my baby was never registered for a SSN which makes me extremely upset! so i called the SS office and they said they couldnt accpewt my application bc my baby was dead!! so i gave ol dude my 2 cents and told him im coming up there any way and showing him what a little girl like me can do when my emotions arent in tact and that somebody better do something before i flip. My baby was born alive and lived so why isnt she intitled to a number stating that, just bc she didnt live as long as me and you doesnt mean she didnt exist.
i feel like the doctors are telling me, "hey we know your baby isnt going to survive so we said fuck it were not doing the paper work!!!"

so i called the hospital she was born at had a mental breakdown and she is calling me back when she gets to her office. im so livid.

My question is, do yall have SSN for your babys? i know @babynewyear2012 does.
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Comments

  • starrxoxo9starrxoxo9
    That's bs!! It's like saying she never existed! And what's it to them anyway, just give her a damn number like everyone else!!!! I'd be raising he'll too.
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    I know! im so hurt!!!
  • AngelMaxwellsMamaAngelMaxwellsMama
    edited January 2012
    @ripKaydence As long as your baby lived---whether it was 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 days she should have been issued a SSN!! I am upset for you. I am so sorry, she took her first breath alive and in the world so you are entitled. Also if you have a valid birth certificate that is proof that they owe you a SSN for your little girl. My son was stillborn so I didn't get anything and I understand why, BUT babies that die shortly after birth are still entitled to all of that paperwork. I have met two women on other parenting forums, one had a little girl to pass 20 minutes after birth, the other had a little girl that passed one week after birth. They BOTH have birth certificates, death certificates, and SSN's for their angels. Please dispute this Momma and do not let it go. They need to recognize your daughter did live. Best of luck to you and again I am so sorry they are giving you such a hard time!
  • FullTimeMommyFullTimeMommy
    I'm so sorry to hear that!
    I live in Canada...
    I'm going to assume (So I could TOTALLY be wrong... Shoot I said I wouldn't CAPS a word to emphasize it any more lol... Okay, last time!)
    So anyway, I'm going to assume you mean a -Social Security Number-
    Here we call them a -Social Insurance Number-
    In BC, when babies are born... Up until just recently they weren't given a number at birth. It's an option they just started giving Mother's too tick off when applying for a birth certificate. That, and you tick off a Care Card (Health Card)
    You actually just applied for it, generally when you were 15 or 16 and wanted to get your first job because in Canada that's all we use them for... Employment purpose's.
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    im calling the nicu now and asking for the case manager
  • starrxoxo9starrxoxo9
    Good luck!!
  • LilSugarsMommaLilSugarsMomma
    :O baloney!! I've dealt with the folks that work for the SSA when you call the general number and they're a bunch of fuck bags, they are rude as hell! I'm sorry they're making it hard for you. You will get her card, I'm sure of it! Good luck girl.
  • dra765dra765
    I don't mean to be rude and you most definately don't have to answer me, but I lost track of your story and was curious what ever happened with your baby Amber?
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    @dra765 its not rude. lol i had her via c section on oct 10th bc she has excess fluid around her heart so they took her at 33+1 weeks she went straight to the nicu was there for about 45 hours. on oct 12th around 1am i got a call to my room sayin she had crashed. so they put her on a different breathing machine and i went back upstairs to pump more and they called me down at 330am and said it happened again. they immediately called the chaplin to baptise her and that happened at 5am and i stayed down there with my husband and son in her private room and at 730am they told us there was nothing more to do but spend time with her so they took her tubes out and gave her to me and me and my husband held her in our arms together till they pronounced her dead at 825am.
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  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    @ashleyfew i called the case manager and she directed me to the birth regitistry and they told me as long as i have a birth certificate iim entitled to a ssn for her and to go there in person and ill get it so monday thats the plan!!!
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    oh also i been waiting on her pictures for 4 months...turns out, they never ordered any. they took them but didnt order them so i will have them in 7 days!!
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  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    @ashleyfew uh i agree, total idiot
  • Alwayzbeenurz2008Alwayzbeenurz2008
    My mom had two babys who passed at 7 months they lived for 30 mins then passed away I dont think they gave her ssn's either
  • dra765dra765
    Oh wow I'm so sorry. I followed your story for ever. Our babies were born on the same day! Mine was 10/10/11 at 4:51 a.m. glad you can get that ssn I would be pissed
  • Jaime77Jaime77
    @ripKaydence
    Your 100% entitled to have an ssi# because she has a certificate of live birth.
    Your also able to claim her on this years taxes. One time only. If its going to be a pain in the ass waiting until you have her card. Go ahead and file but have your taxes amended when it comes in.
    My son lived for 2 days we claimed him that following year.
  • FateFate
    Do we get to see the pictures of beautiful Kaydence?
  • FateFate
    I still look at the ones from when she was born and all of the prayer comments. Everyone loved her instantly.
  • jodi102011jodi102011
    @ripKaydence, sorry I have not been on in awhile. Definitely bs. She was alive when born. She qualifies for a ss#. Mason was alive for a couple of min and he has one. I am so sorry amber.
  • jodi102011jodi102011
    Ok just read the rest of your post. I am glad you are getting one.
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    they said NC that she has to either been applied for at birth which she wasnt bc they dont register babys under 3lbs. bc of ss benefits but i was never informed of that. and since she didnt live for 8 weeks after that that she is not entitled to one. @jodi02011
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    @jtmoon98 what state do you live in thats horrible. whats there stillbirth policy. was he born alive? you dont have to answer i know how sensitive the subject is. kay only lived for 45 hours.
  • jodi102011jodi102011
    @ripKaydence, my notifications are not working. That is complete bs. I am in mn. It must be different rules in every state.
  • levensmommylevensmommy
    You don't need a SSN issued to claim her on your taxes. The IRS will accept a copy of birth and death certificates, or hospital records instead for babies that were born and passed in the same year. I don't know if that is the only reason you wanted one, but I hope this info helps ;;)
    And you certainly don't need any silly government issued number to acknowledge that she existed, you only need to look into your own heart for that.
  • levensmommylevensmommy
    @ripKaydence
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    @levensmommy i know and ive already filed. i want it for my own personal benefit. im making a memorial for her. with her birth and death certificate and was hoping for her ssn its for me. no one else. i could give a *uck what haters say this is my daqughter and until you have one and they died or have one that did make it (not specifically towards you, just in general) i dont think you under stand how much that "little stuff" means.
  • levensmommylevensmommy
    @ripKaydence I don't think it's little stuff if it is important to you. I can't even begin to imagine how hard it all has been for you. That's why I was just trying to help with something small(like taxes). But you should by all means do whatever you need to to get the number, especially since it means so much to you. Good luck :*
  • ripKaydenceripKaydence
    @jtmoon did he take a breath?
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