Feeling Down

Steph_Due_101611

"It's too much pain to have to bear, to love a man you have to share" -Sugarland

That's my current mood. His voice makes me smile but his words bring me tears. God I love him soo much and this hurts so bad.

1stWoodsBaby

I'm not sure of your situation, but sounds like we are in the same boat, sorta.
I'm sorry you are hurting.. I know how awful it can feel to hurt. I hope you get some relief to your pain soon.

Janet_2011

I am so sorry for what ever you are going through

RTMommy

Steph_Due_101611

Omg its soo complicated. I love him. He loves me. He loves her. She just had his baby. She's married to someone else. She loves him. She loves her husband. @1stwoodsbaby

1stWoodsBaby

I think you just described my life.. except the he's and she's are kind of different as to which she you are and which she I am.
I definitely can feel your pain and know how bad you are hurting then. I'm going through the same thing and this week seems to be a lot harder than the past few months.

Steph_Due_101611

We talk on the phone and his voice makes me feel like im on top of the world. then he mentions her, his girlfriend, and my heart sinks and the tears roll.

RTMommy

Wtf. That's VERY complicated. I wouldn't even know where to begin.

1stWoodsBaby

Atleast he talks to you, although I know that probably makes it a lot harder. I can't ever decide which is the easiest, not talking to that person or talking to that person. Both bring its own set of emotions and pain.

Steph_Due_101611

I've loved him for 5.5yrs. That's longer than anyone. I was his first. My love for him has never died.

Steph_Due_101611

I stopped talking to him and going out to this party bar with him because it was hurting too bad. But I caved back in.

1stWoodsBaby

I caved last week too. It is difficult staying strong and doing something that you really don't want to be doing. Its hard to not talk to that person when thats all you really want.

Steph_Due_101611

We were supposed to see each other today but he worked late and I babysat late. We settled on a phone call talking about how much we missed each other. He always says he wishes he could go back and not have screwed things up that first time. And that he wishes it would have been me with his baby.

1stWoodsBaby

Is there any way you two could work it out and be together? There are lots of couples with step-children (if it worked out to marriage).

Steph_Due_101611

He's still with her. And their baby.

Steph_Due_101611

Oh and her husband. They all live together.

Steph_Due_101611

815-351-5305 @1stwoodsbaby if you wanna text

1stWoodsBaby

But she's married, so how can they actually "BE" together?

1stWoodsBaby

He lives with her and her husband.. oh man. That is a sticky situation! I see the issue now.

Steph_Due_101611

She has her husband and her boyfriend.

Steph_Due_101611

He doesn't want another man raising his child.

Steph_Due_101611

@wyattsmommy the husband knows its his child. The husband is fixed. She was on mirena but it broke from rough sex.

angel26

Wow. That is really crazy. I'm sorry that he did that to you.

Steph_Due_101611

@angel26 the only thing he's doing is breaking my heart.

angel26

@steph_due_101611 it sounds like it. I'm so very sorry. Maybe you should tell him you can't do it anymore. He probably doesn't care that he is hurtting you so much. As long as he gets what he wants.

Steph_Due_101611

So I kinda just poured my feelings into a text and hit send. Waiting for a reply now.