need help asap griving

squrit299squrit299
edited June 2012 in Depression
Okay my boyfriends grandma passed away 2 days ago.... He was really close to her but he won't talk to me about it N all he wants to do is sleep I understand hes depressed but he cant just stop his life and sleep all day then go to work. Idk what to do anymore his mom isn't even this depressed she even told him that maybe he needs counseling he don't believe in that tho..... Idk he just woke up took a shower and is on the couch sleepinv again. What can I do??
oh and he won't talk to me all be says is hes fine

Comments

  • squrit299squrit299
    Anyone?
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
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  • smcoxsmcox
    Well, it has only been two days.... And every one grieves in their own way. Just back off and let him do his thing. Don't push him or try Rio force anything. All you cab do is try to make sure he eats and showers. Just be there for him! My grandfather died almost two years ago and I can tell you I was no where near okay after only two days! I did have to suck it up and try not to think about it cuz my wedding was only two weeks later but that doesn't mean everyone is okay to do that. Its better that he's mourning now vs bottling it up and exploding later! So just let him mourn and give him time. Last thing he needs is his GF or mom trying to force him to talk or yelling him he needs help. If he's still sleeping all day and not talking in a month then approach the issue again. But trust me, just let him go right now and try to help him remember to eat and shower! If he wants to talk, he will!
  • squrit299squrit299
    @mama_kat I just feel like helpless I want so badly to help him
  • smcoxsmcox
    Oh, and for at least a few days, yes he should be able to stop his life (aside from you needing help with baby) and you need to try to be supportive of him, someone close to him just died.
  • squrit299squrit299
    edited June 2012
    @smcox okay ill let him sleep and do what he needs to do I understand he wont be happy or done grieving in 2 days but I just don't.o how to help him right now I've never been throw a death but the thing is.hes.not doing anything no help with baby not takinf the trash out nothingat all just sleep
  • smcoxsmcox
    Seriously, helping him right now is you letting him grieve and just taking care of him. Just let him know you are there without making him talk. I know it's hard, but you can do it! <3
  • squrit299squrit299
    @smcox so just let him sleep when he wakes up tell him im here and he can talk when ever he feels like it
  • smcoxsmcox
    Maybe ask a friend out family member to come over and help you out some. Sometimes men (even when they aren't grieving) can't see past their own needs and desires. Unfortunately, he's probably so wrapped up in his grief he probably doesn't even realize the pressures he's putting on you. Sorry, I know it's tough!
  • smcoxsmcox
    Yes at least for now, maybe a couple more days. Then when/ if you catch him just kind of chilling but awake, maybe sit down, calmly, and explain to him that you completely understand his grieving but you are struggling doing everything yourself and need his help with the small things around the house? That you don't expect him to just all there sudden be okay but you need him to start helping a bit. Try not to sound demanding but like he's needed.
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  • RedShadoe0RedShadoe0
    2 days isn't enough time... Let him be... Just be there for him.
  • Summergirl22Summergirl22
    I agree with everyone else...let him be
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