I'm so sorry! That sounds so frustrating! He is being a butt for sure. That's sad that you can't even talk to him and that he is not caring about how you're feeling. Do you think it would help if you two could go out to dinner or something just the two of you and have an intimate conversation? He needs to listen to you and validate your feelings. That is so annoying how you've basically done everything for her and now he's babying her and acting like he's the only one who can take care of her! I would be so frustrated too! Gosh, you just need to get him to listen to you somehow. Not to be mean or anything, but is he an ass otherwise? Or just like this recently when dealing with the kids? Good luck!
Thank you, he has always kinda been an ass but he is like an ass on crack now mixed with a little disrespect... Like seriously what 30yr old man says blah blah blah when you are talking about something he doesn't want to? And says I'm not talking because your yelling... I just want to be like mf'er ill show you yelling.
My husband is somewhat the same way. He's changed MAYBE 5 diapers, fed her maybe 5 times, and has gotten up in the morning (never at night) 5 times. She's 10 months old. But when we are in public its a whole different story! He acts like he does EVERYTHING for her. He wants to carry her and act like I dont do anything. Makes me want to punxh him.
@second_time_mommy7, I say find an opportune time to blah blah blah him and see how he likes it. Sounds childish, but it may open his eyes to how rude it is.
Hmm, I wonder why the change in him? Do you think he all of a sudden realized that he really did miss out on the first year of her life so now he has changed his behavior in an attempt to fix it? He needs to have an adult conversation with you instead of that "blah blah blah" mess. Have you said, "Listen, I don't undermine you in front of the kids so don't undermine me. I don't say 'blah blah blah' to you so don't do it to me. Tit for tat." It's time to treat you as an equal!
I don't think u should let him so whatever when his home because when his not your going to have a routine then is not fair to her because it's confusing ya know. Which will only get her to act up even more. I would get a routine together write it down and tell him that this is best for all the kids makes them happier there is a lot of research out there about that. Honestly if he has anything to say about that rather then just doing it I would tell him you guys need to go see someone who can talk to you about how to find common ground in raising the children. And u need to come to a agreement. I know if it was me and there was no middle ground I wouldn't care about the relationship because what is good for my daughter comes first. I'm sure your the same way. I would just flat out tell him this is the way it is.
On his next day off, go out with your son for a long time!! Leave him with her as long as you are while he's at work. My bf is good with taking care of her, but he's told me he hates that he doesn't see her as much as I do, so he plays extra with her when he's home (the idiot actually STARTED a food fight with her the other day lol) but whenever he gets too into the 'good cop' role, I snap him out of it by going out. He's fine being playful with her, but once he realizes she's got bad sides as well as good...his attitude changes..for a while at least lol
Your response to me seriously made me laugh my ass off...."ass on crack mixed with a little disrespect" You are too funny. What a jerk though, my my! I can't believe the blah, blah, blah part. You are right, what 30 year old does that? I think you should give it right back to him! He needs as SERIOUS talk....in and environment where he HAS to listen. I'd love to give him a serious talk and start with a punch in the face, lol! b-(
OMG @1stwoodsbaby my kids father does the exact same thing with our daughter! Drives me bat-sh*t. Its getting better now that she's a toddler and she isn't content to be a pretty little ornament anymore (she wants to walk and explore). Now when he tries to carry her around showing off his "paternal skills" and she throws a full-blown toddler tantrum (which, of course he has no idea how to interpret), I laugh a little on the inside...
He wasn't like this with our son...well, he did show off a bit in front of company. But, he had earned the right to (he used to take late night bottle feeds so I could sleep, changed lots of diapers etc.)
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@second_time_mommy7, I say find an opportune time to blah blah blah him and see how he likes it. Sounds childish, but it may open his eyes to how rude it is.
I'd love to give him a serious talk and start with a punch in the face, lol! b-(
He wasn't like this with our son...well, he did show off a bit in front of company. But, he had earned the right to (he used to take late night bottle feeds so I could sleep, changed lots of diapers etc.)