Advice/opinions please

2ndtimearound2ndtimearound
edited December 2012 in Trying to conceive
I am 38 and I have a 15 yr old and a 1 year old. I got married 2 yrs ago and we got pregnant right away due to my "advanced maternal age". We thought we just wanted one but we would like Zoe to have a sibling to grow up with (let's face it my 15 yr old son isn't going to want to hang out with us much longer).

So we have been going back & forth about this subject. My husband was hired through a temp agency and keeps being told that they really like him & want to hire him but things are too slow right now for the company and they can't do any new hires. He was hired in Feb, and we have been waiting for him to get hired before trying to get preggers.

I'm gonna be 39 in Feb and feel like I'm just getting too old. We are trying to make sure we can financially afford another child but in the meantime my fertility is declining rapidly.

What should we do? Is it irresponsible to have a baby when my husband has no job security? I feel like it's now or never.

Comments

  • ashley_smashleyashley_smashley
    Is it that you absolutely CAN'T afford another right now? Or you just don't want to bc he doesn't have a job? If you can afford it, while jobless (by cutting back) I say go for it! You don't want to wait to long. Plus it takes 9 months to have a baby...he could have a job by then!
  • ashley_smashleyashley_smashley
    If your age wasn't a factor I would say wait..but since it is, I would lock down the bills and take a leap!
  • Mallory27Mallory27
    Personally i think if you wait untill you are finacially set to have a baby you never will lol I say go for it! and like Ashely_smashley said 9 months is a long time anything could happen during that time!
  • 3rdbabybump3rdbabybump
    someone once told me your never financially ready for a baby! now preggo with number four, and God has always provided for us! best of luck ttc!!!
  • StarlillyStarlilly
    Do you work? Really I think you should do whatever you want! I know some people won't agree! But only you know your situation better than anyone else.. I wouldn't worry about what anyone thinks is right or wrong, but what's going to make you guys happy! if that's being stable than that's what you move towards!
  • 2ndtimearound2ndtimearound
    @ashley_smashley We can afford it if my husband still has his job. Right now we could do it but it will be tight, and once they officially hire my husband he'll get a $3/hr raise.

    @starlilly I work full-time & I make good money, good benefits, and it's a very secure job. My husband was working for a company for 8 yrs when I met him making good money too. But when the economy tanked he lost that job and has been struggling to earn the same kind of money.

    @mallory27 @3rdbabybump. I have heard the same thing about never being financially ready...lol I think I have even told people that but I guess I'm just trying to be fiscally responsible. Maybe I also feel guilty cuz we are always broke, we make ends meet but no extra money to save.
  • ashley_smashleyashley_smashley
    I say...go for it! Honestly, you don't want to look back and wish you had tried!
  • JessibearJessibear
    I agree, I would go for it instead of waiting especially if you guys really want another one! :)
  • natashalynnnatashalynn
    Theres no perfect timing for a kid. I was 20 when I got knocked up, still living with my parents, and my bf was a temp. By no means were we ready, lol, but we made it work. When its something you really want, you make it happen.
  • MollyMolly
    I remember when blueberrysmom was on here and she was 40 and pregnant and got laid off while still pregnant. People make things work no matter what the circumstance! :)
  • My2BoysMy2Boys
    I was told once that if you wait to be financially stable to have kids, you will never have them.
  • soon2b3soon2b3
    @Molly what happened to blueberrysmom? When I was preggers with my 15 month old I lived on here. I loooooved her!!
  • MollyMolly
    @soon2b3 She quit coming on during one of Pregly's meltdowns last year. If I remember correctly she took a break and then just stopped coming on all together, although she didnt ask to be deleted so she could come back! Last I heard, her and blueberry are doing well. :)
  • YNVTishYNVTish
    @2ndtimearound ... I'm 39 and when I was 38 and trying to get pregnant I had way more harder to get pregnant then 10 years ago. So waiting may not be a good idea.

    I agree with @3rdbabybump ... You will never be totally financially ready for a baby, yet... Regardless if you have the money or not... You'll find a way.
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