My irresponsible fiancé.

Chels

I had my fiancé watch our son Jacob while I was cutting up potatoes for dinner. He wasn't doing anything but laying in bed watching tv so I figured he could handle it.. I finish up with the potatoes and I go In our room to check on them and he's asleep! My son is sitting on the floor by our bed demolishing my deoderent. It was EVERYWHERE. And to top it all off he had my cellphone charger wrapped around his fucking neck!!!! WTF?!? Seriously how fucking irresponsible can you possibly be?! He NEVER takes care if Jacob(changing, feeding, baths....NOTHING) The only time he ever bothers with him is to play or yell at him. I ask him to do one fucking simple thing and he fails big time. I'm so fucking furious I could just kick him In The nuts. He works out of state Monday thru Thursday. So you'd figure he'd want to spend as much time as possible with him...HA ugh I wish I would have settled down with a real man. I HATE always feeling like a single mom. But life is fucking life I guess. Vent over.

2lilblessings

That's how I feel sometimes with mine with my daughter he was very helpful now that we have our second one I would expect him to be more helpful and hes not and makes more meses than our toddler I get very frustrated all day he spends outside smoking or working out

Chels

Omg yes!!!! Between my son and him it's definitely like having 2 toddlers! This is our first he will be 2 in September. I feel like he's also going to be our last lately. Every time I ask for help he tells me I'm the mother it's my job! @2lilblessings

2lilblessings

They r dumb they should enjoy them now they r growir fast then they get mad cuz babies pick us over them smh

Chels

I know! He gets so pissed when he comes home from work and Jacob doesn't want ANYTHING to do with him. I try to encourage Jacob to give him hugs and kisses or tickle his feet(Jacob LOVES to tickle feet lol) but he just doesn't want to. I feel bad then I don't because if josh(fiancé) actually took the time to be a "dad" maybe Jacob would want to spend time with him. I try not to let it all get to me but its so hard. Jacob deserves to get attention from both of his parents. I'm just lucky that at least he has me. I guess I give him enough attention for the Both of us + more @2lilblessings

jules

I'm sorry ... well u haven't settled down yet. And if u have those thoughts already I would make sure this is the person u want to be with forever. Don't think about the fact that u have kid together. Think about how u feel. Because at end of the day your kid won't be happy until u are. He is either young and hasn't reached the understanding of how fast they grow up and the effects those little things make. Or I'm sorry to say his just one lazy jerk. My hubby works a lot and when his home hisnot only wanting to play with our daughter but he helps with whatever. If she's needs to eat, or bath, or wants to play. Or his helping me with food or like be cleaned bathrooms yesterday on top of picking up an extra shift and having to be at work at 3am today. And his gonna be tired when his off at 3pm today but he will do stuff with us even though tom be has work at 4am. Honestly I understand your very upset I would be but that's not gonna help the future so I would set the anger aside and have good sit down yet somewhat calm talk with him about what you're thinking and feeling. If u don't not only is it not going to changeit will get worst over time bc his gonna get used up being this way and start thinking it's normal and u don't mind.

2lilblessings

I agree

Wilsomom

Did you make him clean up the deoderant mess? Tell him he failed to watch him so he gets to clean up the mess he made. Does he expect you to clean up after him, feed him, do his laundry, etc? I would simply say "since you don't want to help out around here & I have to take care of our son by myself, I won't have time to pick up after you or do your laundry, fix your dinner & such anymore." Then simply walk away & get busy doing something else. Don't talk about it, don't argue, don't say anything. Then literally don't do anymore of his stuff...just fix meals for you & your son. At first he won't believe you or he'll think you're just talking crap, but in a day or so he'll see you're serious & start asking what's up? That's your perfect moment to have a serious talk with him about how you feel & explain that you love him, but a relationship is give & take.

Chels

@wilsomom No I cleaned it up. I didn't want Jacob to get ahold of it again. When he woke up...I yelled at him. He said I told you I didn't feel good. I thought he was just trying to get out of watching Jacob. And I told him he should've brought Jacob in the kitchen if he was going to go to sleep. That's that. I'm going to try to really talk to him tonight before bed. @jules you are a very lucky woman to have such a great husband. I know he has good in him we just have to dig it out because it went into hiding when I got pregnant...

jules

well from my experience u can't change a guy they have to want to change. Before we were married my hubby went though stage I didn't like I was very calm yet clear about it took one serious talk one evening never had the problem again. And it was habit he had way before me, I just never had to experience it. Because I didn't force he decided on his own to change it, and realized what I was saying made sense. And as far as him not feeling well should never be an excuse to not pay attention to what his child is doing especially since he was fine with keeping an eye on him. Think of it this way would u ever just fall asleep and not be aware of what your child is doing? I know no matter how sick or tired my child and those responsibilities always come first I'm sure you are the same way. I would tell him he should have been watching his child if he aactually cares about his safety. And things happen but if it was on his watch he should have fixed it, in this case clean up. But to you the babies safety comes first so it needed to be cleaned up. Honestly im shocked that he doesn't feel bad at all. What if he would have gotten into something much worst how would he feel if his child was terribly hurt in the process? Just sounds kinda irresponsible on his part.

Wilsomom

If this was just a one time event I would understand, I mean we all make mistakes, but it sounds like this is a habit for him. I hope you both can have a serious talk & work things out.

candy101

^^^agree with everything stop doing anything for him until he learns his lesson. Yes u can each an old dog new tricks it is just harder. All of this crap that u can't change him is just that if he loves his family he will do what is needed. Your man sounds like a case of laziness, that can be fixed, not caring can't.

YNVTish

OMG . Not the cord around the neck. Do you know hoe much legal problems he would have if something happened to your baby.

I'm sure you some him up screaming.. what did he have to say?

MommyLovesSparkle

I'm going through the same thing. Its like I'm.a single mom. Yesterday i had to carry the baby upstairs with two grocery packages, then go back downstairs with the baby to get two pizzas wings and breadsticks, then go back downstairs with the baby to get the gallon of milk and on top of it I'M PREGNANT! I'm so frustrated with him he's not dependable or reliable and he's irresponsible. I swear your not in this alone. Its a horrible feeling. I hate it.