I been meaning to ask you if u have guilt over other young kids and dividing urself. I feel with all the time a newborn takes. I make my self sick worrying about it and he just cries sometimes when I get her
@candy101 Not really, I always make sure the older ones are really involved in helping with the baby. I'll ask them to "watch" the baby for me while I use the bathroom or something. Also if the baby starts crying while I'm doing something with an older one I don't just drop everything & leave them hanging, I'll let the baby cry for a few if need be. I also use a fairly strict schedule with the baby & it makes the baby very happy & content so I have more time with the olders. Hopefully that makes sense. Lol I guess I just kind of add the baby to the family routine rather than revolving the family routine around the baby. BUT... I've had lots of practice so don't feel bad. Maybe just try spending special time with him at the very beginning of the day that way he gets his love tank full early on. Try not to worry, you'll get the hang of it! Each family is different.
@candy101 I feel the same way, guilt towards my 22mo old for not being able to give him the same attention AND guilt towards my 2mo old for not holding him enough, as soon as he's done eating I have to put him down to attend to my other one or just get housework done, I feel like I don't give both of them the attention they deserve and it kills me, I also wondered how @wilsomom does it too!
@excitedforoctober it is hard on him bc I don't have anyone to pick up the slack. My family is hours away and it was just us 70% of the time. Everyone warned me to stop treating him like such a baby but I just didn't listen. Honestly I didn't think I was and now he has tantrums. I have started to give him orders now, I guess bc he is so delayed with speech I treated him as if he couldn't understand me. he is like a one year old in a two year olds body. All these doctors keep asking if he follows commands and I had to say no but I really feel that I just was giving them right.
@wilsomom That makes sense the only problem is rhe first 4-5 weeks she would not come off the breast now we are getting into a sleep at night routine better than my 21.5 month old. She has started letting me sit her down and for the first few weeks I get so depressed that crying doesn't bother me as long as I know they are not hurt. I don't let them cry for hours but if I am washing my sons cups or something I finish. The really bad thing was I was depressed and not getting hungryso I forgot to feed my lil man a ccouple times and he doesn't communicate so I didn't realize it until he was at melt down point. That just made me feel like the a pile of dodo.
Sorry to take over your post with this but I do think a lot us can benefit from your advice. And congratulations on another lil one. You are one strong mommy.
@candy101 I've been through depression at different times too & it is very hard, I completely understand that. I think going from having an only child to two is the biggest transition of all because you're so used to pouring your life into just the one child...and they're used to it too! Lol Everyone I've ever talked to always says the third child is way easier an adjustment than the second. And for me with even a larger family it's even more different I think because each child is so used to having many siblings from the beginning. All the kids here get so excited to have another little brother or sister because it's just out way of life so to speak lol. I remember feeling exactly the way both of you do when I had my second. @excitedforoctober When I was pg with my second I just couldn't imagine how I could love him as much as my first, but I did! And don't worry about taking over the post lol I like talking about this stuff.
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@wilsomom That makes sense the only problem is rhe first 4-5 weeks she would not come off the breast now we are getting into a sleep at night routine better than my 21.5 month old. She has started letting me sit her down and for the first few weeks I get so depressed that crying doesn't bother me as long as I know they are not hurt. I don't let them cry for hours but if I am washing my sons cups or something I finish. The really bad thing was I was depressed and not getting hungryso I forgot to feed my lil man a ccouple times and he doesn't communicate so I didn't realize it until he was at melt down point. That just made me feel like the a pile of dodo.
Sorry to take over your post with this but I do think a lot us can benefit from your advice. And congratulations on another lil one. You are one strong mommy.