Surrogacy...

perly

Would anyone of you ever consider being a surrogate? If yes, please explain why. If no, please explain why.

There's no real reason for my question, i just want to see what are your thoughts about this.

THERE ARE NO RIGHT OR WRONG ANSWERS, SO PLEASE, DON'T START A DEBATE....

I personally think that surrogacy is a beautiful thing and i applaud the women that do that. I, however, could not do it. Im a very emotional person and i get attached easily. I wouldn't be able to carry a life within me and accept the fact that the baby is not mine.
I do wish it was something i could handle emotionally because i know that surrogacy is basically the only chance some couples have, and i love giving but i just know i wouldn't be able to do it.

debs

Im all for it. I have thought about but I couldn't carry a child knowing I couldn't keep it that its not mine. I thought about doing it for my brother and his wife she is unable to get pregnant. But to see a baby that I carried and is just a aunt to would be extremely hard. I would love to do that for them or someone else its an amazing gift to do for a couple

perly

@debs im with you. I wish i could do it because i know it would mean the world to some but i wouldn't be able to handle it emotionally.

coltensmamma

I would do it in a heartbeat. Its not legal in many states, mine being one of them. (At least thats my understanding of the law that ive read)

perly

@coltensmamma i admire women like you

PumpkinCupcake0307

I couldn't do it either. I also become very attached. Its way too hard. I mean they are part of you for 9 whole months. There still hasn't been a day that I haven't been without my son. At most 3 hours. I am very attached to him. I wish I could but I can't

Kimberly4411

I could easily do it, I want everyone to know what it feels like to hold their newborn baby and watch them grow up.
With Madison I wasn't really attached to her until she was a couple weeks old, this pregnancy is so far about the same. I know that sounds really bad but it's true. I've been excited through my pregnancies but would be even more excited getting to share it with another family.

I would be way excited to see their faces, hubby has said absolutely not. If one of my sisters couldn't have more and wanted another, I'd give hubby the option of leaving or dealing with it.

coltensmamma

Ive actually considered getting on a surrogate list in other states. I believe you can deliever anywhere, but the initial conception isnt legal in many states. The miracle of life to me is just that, a miracle. I cannot imagine not being able to conceive or carry my three blessings. I just feel like if i could sacrifice nine months of my life to give someone who cant concieve the miracle that i see in my kids, i would do it without question. Now on the flip side, i would love to find someone willing to send updates and such. No matter what, a small piece would be attached. I would love to see that child grow up. thats just the way i see it. I totally see both sides and understand why some women never would.

perly

@PumkinCake0307 i think for me, is the bonding during pregnancy that gets me attached. The little movements and kicks.

@kimberly4411 @coltensmamma i wish i had the strength of doing such a thing. I would really love to give someone the gift of having a child and watching them grow. Its such a beautiful experience, its a shame that people who actually deserve such a blessing, sometimes don't get it.

Kimberly4411

@perly I'd only be ok with it if the other couple only wanted one of their own, I know basically as long as you can pay you can have however many you want, but there are soooo many children in the u.s. without a family, I know I can't say much since I'm on my second child, but I didn't pay $50,000+ for it, just my thoughts behind it

jules

I agree it's very amazing gift to be able to give to someone. Not something I could ever do I'm way too emotional could never give baby away after 9 months of connecting bc like you said the movements and heart beat and all those doc appointments and just the daily things I do to make sure the baby is healthy. That's all part of the love I already have for the baby can't imagine to have to let it go. It really is so unselfish and most amazing gift that others are able to give.

captivated

Surrogacy is legal in the US It is only illegal to PAY a woman to be a surrogate in some states.

But no, I couldn't do it. One, I absolutely do not ever want to be pregnant again and two, I couldn't ggive up a child that I carried.

2girls_2boys

I thought about it because we where in a pretty baf situation and I needed the money nut needlesd to say I cant do it and I will not do it because I feel I will get attached to the pregnancy plus I have kids and my pregnancies take a toll on
My older kids I'm always tired and Moody ect

Minx1018

For friends I would in a heartbeat. I've already offered it to a couple we know that has not been able to conceive after two years of trying.

Fate

CNN did a story on a woman who was carrying another couples child. The woman went to her 20 week ultrasound and found out the baby had a cleft lip and palette, along with several heart defects and more than one spleen. The couple offered the surrogate $10,000 to abort the baby. She said no, she wasn't going to abort. The couple sued her because in the contract it said she would have to abort in the case serious defects should occur. In Conneticut, the biological donors are the legal parents when the child is born. The surrogate fled to Michigan where the law is that the woman who carried the child is the legal parent. The surrogate then found a family that wanted to adopt the baby. She has to have a lot of surgeries but is beautiful and very lucky that she was carried by a such a wonderful surrogate.

I would do it, I've been asked by a friend to have her baby but have been having too many of my own babies. Lol.

monkey_girl

I would do it if I were one of those women who loves being pregnant. But I don't, I absolutely hate being pregnant.

Emotionally I would be able to do it because I know it's not mine but physically I could not.

Wilsomom

I wouldn't be able to do it because I'd be too emotionally attached too.
That's an amazing story @fate .

PumpkinCupcake0307

Most definitely. A mom and a baby are physically and some emotionally attached during pregnancy.

sands3

I'd love to be able to give that gift to someone, but I would be too emotionally attached as well

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perly

@homebirthadvocate that is amazing! I wish I had that strength

jules

@homebirthadvocate that is amazing! I wish you the best hope all goes well and you should keep us updated on your process it's so amazing and interesting to me

natashalynn

I offered to be one for my cousin and his wife since they were struggling to carry a child. But almost right after I offered, they got pregnant. I don't know if I could or would for anyone else. Although, I was one of those women who wasn't super attached until after I gave birth.