to be married or not to be married??

ericazekendan

Okay soooo.. im 17 and my boyfriends 18. We.re both still in high school and im almost 18 weeks pregnant. My mom and older sister want me and my boyfriend to get married so things will be easier. Me and my boyfriend do want to get married, we.ve been together for 2 years. But I just don't know if its a good decision? Please help.

jmichelle

I'm 19 and my bf is 21. Marriage does not make things easier sweetie. You don't know how a baby will affect your relationship. Its gonna be stressful. Not saying it's not gonna be fine. But you don't wanna add even more stress by addin marriage.
My family sorta pushed marriage on us as well but I decided to wait. Whatever you do good luck. And congrats on the lil one.

natashalynn

I don't know if being married will make things easier though. Marriage takes effort and work. Maybe its enough to take a kid on right now, and think about marriage later?
My bf proposed but I wanted our marriage to be about us being in love, not what we were supposed to do.
Either way. I'm sure you'll make the eight choice, just be completely confident with tour choice!

LoveMyBoys

Marriage doesn't make you a better parent. It definitely doesn't make things easier. I got married at 18 and well, lets just say I was an idiot! We did it because of our 4 month old son...
Here to tell ya.. Getting married is cheap- its divorce that is expensive.
My suggestion, stay together and raise that baby to the best of y'alls ability and later down the road, when you have been together a long time and have seen the best and worst side of your partner... then if you both want- talk about marriage.

mommy2audrey

Wait untill you can have the wedding you want with a dress of your dreams., if that means waiting a year or two that's fine., if your Bf is a good Guy he will still be they for u n baby.

michelya

how does marriage make things easier?

ArmyWifeMadiD

Do not get married because of a child.... my first child and her father got pregnant accidentally after 4years of dating.... we were young but you never know a persons true character until the time calls for it.... I am married now to a man that takes care of my daughter more than her father....

ohiomommy

I would not get married! Not just because your having a baby! My husband and I were married for a year before our first came along! And unfortunatly I couldn't work after he was born! We tried to get help (WIC & MEDICAL CARD) but because we were married and only had one child we didn't qualify! The lady actually told me if I were to come back in a month pregnant or if we got divorced, I would qualify! So my answer to you is NO, if in the future you are still in love and want to, by all means do it! Just not now!! You could end up in the same boat I was 4 years ago! A

ericazekendan

But I already have wic? And we.re not getting married just because we.re having a baby. We really love each other and I know you will all say oh but ur so young, you guys don't know what love is. But we do. And we.re not getting married just cause we.re having a baby. I hate that that's the first thing people think with young people. But thanks for the advice. I asked for it.

LoveMyBoys

But why rush it? Y'all love each other, that's great! But is that a reason to marry right now? Is getting married going to change y'alls love?
This is my opinion and only an opinion... Wait a while. Let the baby come and y'all work on that first. Later, if y'all are still very happy together then talk about marriage. -Take it from someone that has been there.
Just my opinion.

KRITTEN

Just because yall have a child together.doesnt always mean u need to get married. Take ur time ur still young and if things are still great go for it

VictoriaB

I got married before I got pregnant, but we had been trying before we got married. I did it because I wanted a serious, committed relationship. Everyone didn't want us to do it (my two best friends even told me they didn't want to be friends after I told them) but I did it because I knew it was right for me. After we got married, the craziness subsided immediately and my family loves my husband. When I told my grandparents that I was expecting, my grandpa said, "well at least you did things in the right order." That cracked me up Good luck to you!

hupe23

A baby is no reason for ppl to get married. Marry him because you want to and you love him and ur life wouldn't be right without him. And dnt let others make u do something ur not ready for. Ppl keep asking if I'm going to marry my babys Dad. Yeah i plan on it but i will when im ready not because of a baby. We are both happy with our lives why rush things.....?

Msk880687

I am 22 expecting my second child with my boyfriend of almost 8 years we had our daughter when I was 18 he was 19 and living together for the first couple months was stressful. We broke up but it was mostly because of my mom. She stressed him out a lot, but after we got back together we have been happy without marriage. I would say live together for a while ALONE with mo family just you if you cant do it for a year then there is no point in being married!! Because there is no reason for you to be married and just end up in divorce. dont just get married because you are having a child. Your baby will love you both even if you are not Married or together. Just my two cents.

kylieonnum4

I got marriedat 19 marriage is just a piece of paper that cause hell at the end I'm going thru a divorce at 24 if ur not sure to get married then wait till after the baby for awhile to see how ur relationship should be

jcmommy

I got pregnant and my parents wanted me to get married to save face. So we did, it was the hardest years of my life! We were so young. We couldn't stand each other, just listening to him breathe bothered me. But we both grew up from families that once you're married, then you stayed married and it rubbed off onto us. We've been together for 5 yrs now and couldn't be happier. You have to work through the tough times to recognize the good. It has to be if you both are in it for the forever part. There's no point in getting married if you're so unsure. Wait til you're ready.

annamazing

Getting married is not cheap lol . At least my wedding wasn't . And it does add a lot of stress and more bills . It's great but takes lots of work . I say just focus on baby for now

ericazekendan

But the thing is im not unsure about getting married!! We wanted it before we found out I was pregnant.

jcmommy

If you're not unsure then you wouldn't ask. Go with how you feel. We don't know your relationship like you do. If you're ready and can afford it. Why not?

ashleywiini16

My advice would be to really ask yourself why you want to get married. If it is truly because you love each other and know 100% that you will work together, thick and thin, good times and bad and you are completely ready to make that commitment to this one person for the rest of your life... then by all means get married! Marriage is a blessing, a gift. It doesn't mean its going to be easy, and neither will having a baby. Its all going to be tough. But knowing you two are committed to each other and to this child, will help. As long as youre READY. No one can tell you whether YOU are ready or not. That's youre call. I got married at a young age and honestly ... it was the biggest mistake id ever made. Because I did it because of pressure from family, religion, and I just thought it sounded glamerous. I was anxious to plan a big wedding. BUT looking back, I knew something wasn't right, I was scared deep down. But I got too deep to turn back. Anyhow ... luckily when we divorced there were no kids involved. Now I am remarried and having our first child. All you should know is marriage doesn't make things easier, in fact it can make things harder. Its a big decision! But only your decision to make... and like I said... my opinion, if youre truly ready and you will not regret getting married while youre pregnant then go for it! It IS a blessing and so is your baby! Good luck to you!!!