I need help

angel26angel26
edited November 2012 in Parenting
Im not sure if this is right catagory for this, but I have 2 things I need help/advice on.
1) I have a 3 yr old who speaks but a lot of time its not very clear. I thought by now we would understand 90% of what he says. But we cant. Theres some letters he cant say properly, we have tried saying alphabet with him and have discovered some letters he struggles with. Im not sure if this should be a concern or what I should do about it. Does anyone have any input on this?
2) same child (the 3yo) every single time we give him a shower or bath he screams like a banchie. We are afraid someone will call cps on us because hes screaming so bad. And its mainly when we washing his hair. He loves playing in the tub. But come time to wash his hair he starts freaking out. And I am totally lost on how to make him stop. Has anyone ever delt with anything like this? Can anyone give any advice or input?
Please help. I am at a loss with how to deal with these issues. My older child didnt have these issues.

Comments

  • MorgDeeBeeMorgDeeBee
    My nephew was the same way with washing his hair he hated the water being on his head/face. They put him in swim classes and now he loves pour the water on his head himself. Once he realized that the water wouldn't hurt him he was fine.
  • angel26angel26
    @morgdeebee we have tried showing him it wont hurt. But he still flips. W# cant afford swim lessons. Im jus2 afraid someone will call child pertective services. Im actually suprised no one hasnt yet. I mean, he screams bad.
  • MorgDeeBeeMorgDeeBee
    They kept showing him too bit it didn't help right away. Oh no I wasn't saying to put him him in lessons just that it may take something other then a bath to help him.
  • Bahamamama4828 Bahamamama4828
    Is there anything else he freaks on? Like noise or textures or fabric like clothes he wears? My 10 yr old started speech therapy about 3 yrs old.
  • MollyMolly
    My coworker's kid is exactly like this. She screams when you wash her hair in the bath, like blood-curdling screams. She screams when they put clothes over her head because she hates her head and face to be touched. She is 3 and you can't understand a word she says, it's all just jibberish.

    Her mom told me it has something to do with her head. She has an enormous head, I forget what percentile she is in for the size of her cranium but her head is way too big for her body. Her mom doesn't seem to worried and attributes it to the size of her head.
  • allyssasmommyallyssasmommy
    It's a fase and as far as talking just keep working on it you'll be fine
  • BigBellyBigBelly
    Have him tested. And try and turn hair washing time into some sort of game. Like see how many bubbles he can make on his head by rubbing it fast. Idk just an idea :)
  • sehra4177sehra4177
    My son is 2.5 and we only have a shower no bathtub...so since he could stand I put him in there. He still fights me and its been one and a half years. I found tho that I put hum in with a cup he likes it. He can pour the water on himself. Npw at first he would shower with his sister who is a little older...I felt she needed to shower alone lately bc she is getting to that age but him seeing her doing it helped too. If he doesn't have a sibling maybe go in with him a few times throw water on your head and laugh. I make it a game too bc I still get a hard time...he loves spiderman so I say we are gonna go as quick as spiderman...I say one two three go...and he undresses and gets in...I wash him really quick and say ok pour the water to rinse your hair. He does it then. There isn't a need to keep them in too long. Just wash and out...he is clean. I also tell him it is rain sometimes and tell him he needs to hurry so he can get out of the rain...he laughs and is fine. He used to scream bloody murder but npw its only every once in awhile like if I try to shower him when he is playing or tired. Good luck.
    As for words my son is the same...some things are so clear and others forget it. He says "L" like "W" but my daughter was like that and now speaks better than most adults lol. Once she got to school she dropped those habits and it stopped...I wouldn't stress bc I tried so hard with her and she kept doing it...then it just faded away once in school. Even with my son when he says stuff wrong I correct him but he still says it wrong...its funny bc sometimes my daughter has to translate for me
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    The water on hair thing is totally normal. Both my kids (1.5 yo girl/3 yo boy) scream when they get water on the top of their heads. Try having him tilt his head back while gently pouring with one hand and guiding the water away from his face and ears with the other. Have a towel in reach to quickly wipe any water that drips on his face. This may not eliminate screaming. But, it should reduce it.

    In regard to his speech, at 3 strangers should be able to understand him 75% of the time (words or letters). My son wasn't able to be understood 90% of the time by strangers at 3. He was already in speech through early intervention. Two months ago (1 month after he turned 3), he started a special education preschool...he can now be understood 80-90% of the time. So, I definitely recommend contacting the school district to have him evaluated. The earlier speech therapy is introduced, the more long-term success (compared to when a kid is 9-10...speech isn't as changable).
  • MijitaMijita
    There are federally funded programs that assist in helping kids who have developmental delays. Seek assistance in this area, as @Math_Mommy has suggested. It's not Head Start, but a program similar to it. The earlier the intervention, the better.
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    We also did private speech therapy while (and for a few months after) we battled it out to get him services through early intervention (our caseworker kept insisting he was okay, and i don't think she knew how to score the test correctly because he kept testing above the cutoff for services). It wasn't until he was in a school setting that his speech and language comprehension really improved.
  • crystaldawn0830crystaldawn0830
    I would talk to the doctor about it and maybe they can make a referral. It's better to be proactive and take care of it when they are younger. My son is a year old and has an EXTERMELY hard time eating. My dr did mention it was a little odd so we are now going to an occupational therapist soon. Trust ur gut instinct! I know sometimes as moms we freak out a little bit but sometimes I think it's good to be so in tuned to our children!

    The worse thing the dr can say is your just over reacting and this is normal. Which would make you feel relieved. If you don't bring it up then years could go by before he gets accessed at school or what not.
  • angel26angel26
    @bahamamama4828 I think there is but I cant think of what at the moment. I havent seen you in a while, thank you for comenting. He doesnt like us wahing his face with washcloth?
    @molly he just hates his face getting wet mostly. His head size has always been normal. But I am worried that his last seizer did something. He used to have seiziers when he got high fevers. And they only lasted a couple seconds each time. But his last one lasted a long time.
    @bigbelly I will try that. We try to make it fun for them (him and 5yo brother) I have even tried bath crayons. Come hair washing he flips.
    @mathmommy my older son used to cry when washing hair but not scream. Now hes ok. My daughter doesnt cry. She is almost 11mo, she doesnt like it but she doesnt cry. I try making it fun. And who do I call to get him tested? Do I talk to his pedi?
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    All his pedi can do is give you a prescription or referral for speech therapy (which would either have to be paid by insurance or out-of-pocket). If you call your local elementary school, they can direct you to the early childhood specialists for an evaluation.
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    edited November 2012
    When he is evaluated, mention his behavior to the specialists (they should have a team with a speech therapist, ot and pt). While his behavior sounds normal to me, they might notice other things that are indicative of a sensory processing issue.
  • angel26angel26
    And thank you to all others that shared their input im on my phone and its hard to tag everyone.
  • angel26angel26
    @mathmommy thank you. Is there a way to see if his last seizier did anything? Or if its just something that has always been wrong?
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    Not sure if there is a way to tell if the seizure did anything without a before & after cat scan or MRI... that is definitely a question for his pedi
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    Plenty of kids (especially boys) that have never had a seizure have speech delays.
  • angel26angel26
    @mathmommy ok. Thank you. I am just concerned. Lol. Do you think if something is wrong if it could affect potty training? Cuz now that we have a place we have tried training him. But he has no desire to. He actually gets upset when we try.
  • angel26angel26
    @mathmommy so this could be totally unrelated to them?
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    edited November 2012
    For sure
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    As far as potty training, as long as you understand him i would think it would be unaffected by his speech/communication abilities.
  • MijitaMijita
    Wait a couple weeks to try potty training, as forcing him will cause regression. He's not cognitively ready. Most physicians will tell you not to force potty training. It should be a done in a conducive manner and forcing it will only make it very difficult and an unpleasant experience for all parties involved.
  • Math_MommyMath_Mommy
    I was going to write what @mijita said above (my over-tired kids and I were leaving the zoo).

    Wait a few weeks to resume potty training. Get a new potty seat and change the treat he gets (or introduce a treat if you didn't before) when you do resume.
  • angel26angel26
    edited November 2012
    @math_mommy & @mijita ok. Thank you. I will try that. Plus hes sick right now, he has bad cough. I will wait til he gets better.
    Thank you ladies for all your help and input.
    Math_mommy I didnt realize I was tagging you wrong. Im sorry.
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