advice for a first time mom to be.

natandfer1993natandfer1993
edited July 2011 in Relationships
Okay, so i am 17 and expecting my first baby girl.
I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and we are moving in together in the middle of august.
however, i am nervous to move in with him because i am scared that we are only going to grow apart when we move in together. Like a lot of times when people move in together they fight more often and end up breaking up. I am scared the stress of the situation. He seems optimistic but i just want to know what you moms think. or some advice to deal with these fears. im just scared i want to make the best decision for all of my family.
I know my boyfriend is a great guy and will try.
my mom does not like the idea of me moving out, but is allowing me to do so.
and im just nervous.

Comments

  • momof22bemomof22be
    Well u will need allot of help when it baby is born how old is hey no judgment I promise
  • natandfer1993natandfer1993
    He is 20. ill be 18 when the baby is born. money isnt a problem at all. just stressed i went from thinking i couldnt get pregnant to finding out i was.
  • natandfer1993natandfer1993
    @momof22be
  • mommy2be92mommy2be92
    Yeah moving in does cause more fights but it also makes you stronger and the relationship becomes soooo much stronger at first it'll be great then a few months down the road you will start to fight more then after you get past that it'll be happy and the fights will die down and just become stupid fights about house cleaning and stuff along that line
  • mschopmschop
    For most people, don't spend 24/7 together, you both need you time. Talk, laugh and go out of your way to be helpful to each other
  • natandfer1993natandfer1993
    @mommy2be92 thanks that makes me feel a little better. im just sort of apprehensive because i have never lived with a boyfriend before and it seems scary to me. I just dont wanna make anything worse.
    @mschop thanks for the advice i will be sure to do that.
  • mommy2be92mommy2be92
    I'm 19 & have been living with my other half for a year now and its def a lot of work but well worth it espically getting too cuddle everyday
  • honeybunnyhoneybunny
    Just remember to communicate holding things in only leads to disaster and try to be open minded and remember he has feelings too. I hope this helps a little.
  • momof22bemomof22be
    I wasn't meaning help with money just help with ur baby and I think u seem mature enough to handle the situation and just remember to never let ur foot up keep it down if u need help with bottles or diapers or just holding her for a while he needs to do it I had my first @17 and he was 22 so I know how its scarry but I think u will be just fine and as the ladies say u will fight more but it will bring u closer together and u can always go visit ur moms house for a few nights or even just one night if it gets too hard
  • natandfer1993natandfer1993
    @honeybunny thanks, i will def keep it in mind!!! and anything helps=]
    and @momof22be yah, i am sure i will need tons of help with the baby, but i know he will be good for that. it is important to him to be there. and yah, my mom told me the door is always open if i get sick of him or if he gets sick of me. She is a great mom. im lucky to have her. and yah thanks for the advice, it is nice to hear from someone who was in the situation.
  • momof22bemomof22be
    I'm glad u have all the support u need go for it good luck. :)
  • mommy3mommy3
    Moving in together does get stressful at times, but like someone else said.. just communicate and things won't be near as bad. And don't think you're fighting just because its you & your bf.. you'd be fighting with any new roommate.. it takes patience & communication.. once you two adjust and get on your own little schedule, you'll be fine!! (:
  • mrs_shumrs_shu
    Most people fight because its a big chance living with another individual. And you wont know how different they really are until it happens. Most of it is lots of small things, so communication is KEY other wise those small things snowball into about 50 things and you explode.
  • mrs_shumrs_shu
    *change not chance lol

    And @mommy3 is correct. Even if you moved in with a friend it'd be the same thing-minus the sharing a bed part ;)
  • Mamato2boysMamato2boys
    i was in the same situation at your age and well i wasnt lucky to have geat mom like yours to even let you leave and allow u back if you need to but needless to say its a 50/50 i mean if you guys r serious about each other then its something you guys will have to eventually do its like the saying goes
    "if you cant handle me at my worst then you dont deserve me at my best" and it will be a learning experience for you bith you dont truly know a person until u live with them and OMG when i first moved in with my hubby (bf at the time) he was a SLOB!!! im a neat freak so that immediatley teared some arguments but youre gonna have to learn to compromise and learn things about each other all your habits and what not and it will be great having your bf there to help after the baby arrives especially those late night feedings and diaper changing when youve been sore all day it helps to make him get up and take over ;) Just remember to give each other space dont spend 24/7 w him youll get overwhelmed eventually and so will he......dont nag and complain instead just figure out a way to let him know something is bothering u and u need him to help u fix it COMPROMISE----especially if its his doing---->dont point it out right away just kinda hint it to him lol 8 yrs later and married weve made it and were as much in love as we were back then!! :) <3
  • smcoxsmcox
    Just like all these other women have said, you will argue more... Go into it expecting that. But you must learn to communicate and compromise! and if it gets to a point where you guys can't figure it out or feel like it's not going to work, don't be afraid to seek professional help. My hubby and I hardly saw each other ( only on weekends if that) before we got married so moving in with each other was a big blow. We did end up going to s marriage counselor, it was the best thing we could have done for us. Oh and a big thing we learned was don't run to your parents and tell them every problem or fight you guys have cuz your parents will always or most of the time will take your side or possibly hurt their opinion of your significant other so make sure not to vent to your parents for everything.
  • natandfer1993natandfer1993
    Aw u guys make me feel better :) thanks so much ill let u guys know how it goes
  • bbylucasMommabbylucasMomma
    I agree fights and opening up to eachother brings you closer together my bf/bd is my bestest friend I love his soooo much and I know he loves me the same we moved in together at the begining of the year a little after we got pregnant :) and I know for sure were gonna grow old together and wear matching joggers :)

    I hope you'll be as blessed as I am <3
  • bbylucasMommabbylucasMomma
    Ps we both just turned 21 and its our first time living with someone who's not family
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