This is deep :-(..Uqhh this makes me sad! I want you two to work it out but I KNOW YOU & ONLY YOU know whats best! So keep being a wonderful mother to your children & stay strong :-)
Awww girl I love that last line. It's just so bitterly true. I'm sorry you have to feel all of this, I can only imagine how you're feeling. I wish I could hug ya >:D< stay strong and know what you are worth. So many people say "I'm sorry" a little too late, and by then it seems to longer matter. They are cowards for that.
One of my closest friends out here has been married for a yr with her high-school sweetheart and found out he has been "connecting" with a friends sister, and they had a hit ans heavy makeout session feeling each other up and falling asleep next to each other... doesn't admit and sex... and watching her hurt has made me so sad. I feel for her, and u, and any other ladies betrayed during these "happy" times. What advise would u give if you could talk to her? Where have you found your strength?
@pinkigirl love that end too... beautiful and I fully believe in that! I've found it. She will, I just know it! "God blessed the broken road, that lead me straight to you"
You made me ball my eyes out. I know how you feel oh so well!!!! It is very hard I know first hand!!! I am haply you stood your ground hun. It is hard very hard. I feel like at times they do it on purpose and want us to suffer as much as we think they are. I hope your girls have fun with there dad. Bond with your daughter. Hope all ends up working out and it will it will just take time. Follow your heart stand your ground and keep your girls safe!!!! Wish you the best of luck hun! Proud of you! >:D<
You know how I feel, and that I love you to bits! You also know I will be here to support you through out everything..especially on Wednesday! I love you mama!
@mrsrocketfield1221 that is a song I played for my husband b4 I told him I loved him. I couldn't say the words, but I felt them. He played I'm a believer. It happened to me too! He's great! The opposite of my ex. He never mises an ob appt(my ex ignored my pregnancy & wanted me to get rid of our son!) He tells me I'm smart, beautiful & wonderful. He knows I sometimes get a bit crazy about chicks flirting & i sometimes think I'm not good enough. He loves me for all of it. He also adores my son. He's not afraid to say no or punish him but he also tells him hes a great kid. He's my soul mate & I'm happy to share my story to give others hope.
@pinkigirl I love it love it love it! Everything happens for a reason... even the tough stuff huh?! love your happy ending, can't wait till fate shares that too!
@mrsrocketfield1221 I would tell her to look into her heart, as I did. That's where I got my strength. And believe it or not, you ladies are my ROCK! She needs to find a good support system, and I KNOW you are apart of it. Her being married for a year and already going through this, I wonder what is going through his mind? Chasing tail days should be over after that bachelor party and I do's. I would love to chat with her, or maybe you could just show her a couple of my threads? I hope it helps her get in touch with her own feelings. I wonder when my happy ending will be here...
@Mythica Hun, I had the best of strength in the worst of times. If I lend you my strength, I hope it helps you in whatever issues you have. I pray you can get through it and be happy with yourself afterwards. Tell me what's going on? I'm not a counselor, but I want to help, since you have helped me.
@Everyone Today is the day. He said he can't wait until Wednesday to talk. I'm so terrified. I'm already messed up, I wonder how much more I can take. Seems I'm running on empty... I'm not a Yo-Yo. He needs to see that...
Stand your ground girl. You are an amazing person with a strong backbone. I played that game a couple of times myself. My ex and I were together for 12 years. He was my everything. Even after all the lies abuse cheating alcohol drugs and stealing from me it was like I was losing my whole life the day I walked out that door. My 3 boys that we had together were so confused and heartbroken. But I wasn't going to do it anymore. I kept telling myself that I wasn't going to give in again. I gave in 3 times before and this was it. After the last fight and him losing his temper and choking me in front of my little boy I was done. I moved out and moved on but it was so hard to see him when we exchanged kids and he seemed like he had changed just like he did everyother time that I had left. I cried for a couple of months about it all and everytime I seen him but then I learned to stay busy and meet new ppl and start hanging out with ppl. Our divorce has been final for 3 years now and I have moved on and am happily married again to a man that takes my breath away just walking in the room.
Yes they do. And I'm sure he needs them also. My kids go to their dads every weekend to stay and its the hardest thing to do is to watch them get out of my car and to get into his and drive away. He lives 3 hours from me so we have a half way point. And on weekends that he doesn't get them they act out. Its horrible. I wish you lots of luck in this journey. Its a hard road to take.
Whatever u decide honey, stay the strong and wonderful person u are! Don't let a man or anyone else change u or bring u down! I have way to much experience there! I know its hard but u will learn how to cope! *hugs*
You know, maybe tomorrow at work I can show her? Or this weekend so she doesn't get upset at work. I've just been trying to be a good friend, help where I can, support her decisions, distract here when needed, and give her strength if I can. I think she should connect with ppl that have been through it in a similar way. I've had a lot of crap.happen but not while married and pregnant so I was able to get out far easier.
I promise you, you will find your happy ever after. I can feel it... just be patient and take thus time to learn. Find yourself without anyone else. And keep being a great mommy! It will come... likebthey say pregnancy does... when ur not even looking (((Hugs))) >:D<
A love that is lost, is never wasted.----this you said at the end of your update THIS should be the title of your book!! I it lol
on another note i truly admire how strong you are...i dont know what i would do in your shoes...i was in that situation (kind of) before kinda like u but with a twist....sometimes things just need time so that the true answer can be revealed....well virtual hugs to you bc i know sometimes all you need to comfort urself is a friendly hug %%- please update
Stay strong mama. It will get easier. You've got a lot of love from us. And even though were just a screen name, were real, and so is our love and prayers.
I got to the house around 4pm Tuesday afternoon. He was sleeping on the floor in the livingroom. I left him there and played with the girls! I missed them soooo much, even though they were only gone for a day. I sat there thinking, what am I doing? This man was unfaithful, untrustworthy, and useless! He woke up around 6:30pm and came to me. He sat down beside me on the bed and began his speech. The things he said, might have made sense to him, but I couldn't grip his excuses for the infidelity. I sat there quietly and he asked if I thought divorce was the best thing. I said no, but he works too far away and I have no trust. He asked how I was 'feeling'. Did he really want to know, or is this his way of hoping that I would ask his feelings? Resentment, sadness, hurt, anger. That's what I felt. Why now? Why not make this effort when I was there? Before I left with the word divorce on my tongue.
I thought, I will show him how I feel. I opened Pregly, and went to my divorce documentary, and scrolled to day one. I handed him my phone and told him to read it. His face, as he read, became filled with regret and sorrow. Tears glazed his eyes he finished reading. He handed the phone back to me and pulled the bill of his hat over his eyes, crossed his arms and sat miserably. If you haven't read that thread, it was written on the day I left him. He finally spoke, "You made me relive that day, I'm so sorry that I've put you thru such horrible emotions". He leaned over, and hugged me for a long time. I cried a million tears, and caught every single one of them. He just kept saying he loves me, and needs me. He said he wants to make me happy. I hate that he was so late with this. My heart had horrible pressure inside of it. As the hug continued, I let go. He didn't. He held me tightly and kissed along my jaw, my nose, eyes, then finally his lips met mine. A wave of emotions rushed over me! For a moment, I was 15 again. I remembered how I would walk by him, and he'd playfully grab me and pull me into his lap. He would make soup for me when I was sick, and lay with me for days until I felt better. There was something I needed to tell him. I don't know if I've even told you ladies. I told him that I'm not well. Three weeks ago, I was diagnosed with kidney disease. My urologist wants me on dialysis, and eventually I will need my right kidney removed. He hugged me tighter and began crying. I'm sure he was dying a little inside. We talked about what the plan was, I would need him home on January 5th for the surgery. For a moment, I am loved again. This isn't the full update, as I only had a few moments to write.
His flight leaves Sunday, back to California, single. I'm going home on Tuesday, single. He wants so bad for us to work, and has been amazing with his effort, but I still haven't forgiven him. Just because he wants me back now, doesn't mean I am willing. I'm still crushed, and I will be for a while.
Your words make me cry. I've read your posts but never commented. I am so sorry you are going through this and you are strong to stand your ground. I wish you the best of luck on this horrible journey and I hope that everything works out as it should. Whether you two get together or stay apart. A part of me says stand your ground and be strong another wants to say go back to him you two obviously love one another. Stay strong and no matter the put come one day it will get easier.
@mama0811 Thank you. He told me just a few minutes ago that I won't find a man that loves me like he does. He said he hopes I do, but at the same time, he hopes I don't so I will miss the love he has for me. He knows it was a selfish comment. What he doesn't know, is how amazing those words made me feel.
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One of my closest friends out here has been married for a yr with her high-school sweetheart and found out he has been "connecting" with a friends sister, and they had a hit ans heavy makeout session feeling each other up and falling asleep next to each other... doesn't admit and sex... and watching her hurt has made me so sad. I feel for her, and u, and any other ladies betrayed during these "happy" times. What advise would u give if you could talk to her? Where have you found your strength?
@Mythica Hun, I had the best of strength in the worst of times. If I lend you my strength, I hope it helps you in whatever issues you have. I pray you can get through it and be happy with yourself afterwards. Tell me what's going on? I'm not a counselor, but I want to help, since you have helped me.
@Everyone Today is the day. He said he can't wait until Wednesday to talk. I'm so terrified. I'm already messed up, I wonder how much more I can take. Seems I'm running on empty... I'm not a Yo-Yo. He needs to see that...
You can do this.
@momof5 I want a good future for my girls. They really need to have him in their lives.
I promise you, you will find your happy ever after. I can feel it... just be patient and take thus time to learn. Find yourself without anyone else. And keep being a great mommy! It will come... likebthey say pregnancy does... when ur not even looking
on another note i truly admire how strong you are...i dont know what i would do in your shoes...i was in that situation (kind of) before kinda like u but with a twist....sometimes things just need time so that the true answer can be revealed....well virtual hugs to you bc i know sometimes all you need to comfort urself is a friendly hug
I got to the house around 4pm Tuesday afternoon. He was sleeping on the floor in the livingroom. I left him there and played with the girls! I missed them soooo much, even though they were only gone for a day. I sat there thinking, what am I doing? This man was unfaithful, untrustworthy, and useless! He woke up around 6:30pm and came to me. He sat down beside me on the bed and began his speech. The things he said, might have made sense to him, but I couldn't grip his excuses for the infidelity. I sat there quietly and he asked if I thought divorce was the best thing. I said no, but he works too far away and I have no trust. He asked how I was 'feeling'. Did he really want to know, or is this his way of hoping that I would ask his feelings? Resentment, sadness, hurt, anger. That's what I felt. Why now? Why not make this effort when I was there? Before I left with the word divorce on my tongue.
I thought, I will show him how I feel. I opened Pregly, and went to my divorce documentary, and scrolled to day one. I handed him my phone and told him to read it. His face, as he read, became filled with regret and sorrow. Tears glazed his eyes he finished reading. He handed the phone back to me and pulled the bill of his hat over his eyes, crossed his arms and sat miserably. If you haven't read that thread, it was written on the day I left him. He finally spoke, "You made me relive that day, I'm so sorry that I've put you thru such horrible emotions". He leaned over, and hugged me for a long time. I cried a million tears, and caught every single one of them. He just kept saying he loves me, and needs me. He said he wants to make me happy. I hate that he was so late with this. My heart had horrible pressure inside of it. As the hug continued, I let go. He didn't. He held me tightly and kissed along my jaw, my nose, eyes, then finally his lips met mine. A wave of emotions rushed over me! For a moment, I was 15 again. I remembered how I would walk by him, and he'd playfully grab me and pull me into his lap. He would make soup for me when I was sick, and lay with me for days until I felt better. There was something I needed to tell him. I don't know if I've even told you ladies. I told him that I'm not well. Three weeks ago, I was diagnosed with kidney disease. My urologist wants me on dialysis, and eventually I will need my right kidney removed. He hugged me tighter and began crying. I'm sure he was dying a little inside. We talked about what the plan was, I would need him home on January 5th for the surgery. For a moment, I am loved again. This isn't the full update, as I only had a few moments to write.
His flight leaves Sunday, back to California, single. I'm going home on Tuesday, single. He wants so bad for us to work, and has been amazing with his effort, but I still haven't forgiven him. Just because he wants me back now, doesn't mean I am willing. I'm still crushed, and I will be for a while.