Does anybody have a problems with their mother in law?

islandgirlislandgirl
edited January 2011 in Pregnant
Me and my bf move out from his parents house cuz im tired of her mother tellin me what to do and what's not to do. She even get freaked out when my bf mention us havin kids even if he was juz kiddin she still u knw get freaked out and said no don't do it. And its juz makes me sad bcuz she's not being supportive. I don't wana tell her that im pregnant I really don't wanna hear anything that will makes me upset. I juz think she doesn't like me. What should I do?
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Comments

  • redchriscoredchrisco
    Tell her your pregnant and don't stress about it. Its not up to her to decide. As long as your happy that's all that matters...when you have your baby she will come around. Congrats to you and good luck.
  • islandgirlislandgirl
    Thank u!
  • katmc1010katmc1010
    Dnt worry.. I had so many probs with my mom in law in the past that my husband didnt talk to her for months. The thing is that she sees it as you're taking her baby away. After I had the baby she changed a little but changed a lot after we got married. If she's mad about you being pregnant she'll change when the baby comes. Dont worry it happens to us all. Just stand by your man so she knows that she cant run you away..
  • katlillykatlilly
    I recently became unemployed, so when I found out I was pregnant I assumed everyone would be disappointed, mostly my mother in law. She was actually excited for us and cried a little. :) maybe instead of her telling you what to do, ask her for advice. That might make you feel less judged and her feel important and needed. Sometimes its just easier playing their game. I know every one says 'eff everybody else' but it will be less stressful for you and your bf. We had lots of drama with the in law, but now we get along great. Sometimes you just gotta let go. Hope this helps. Xo
  • debsdebs
    My mother in-law was horrible to this day I can't stand her she told what to do what not to do so we moved out 2 months before I was due with my first child she told me my baby was staying in her room and she didn't like my daughters name she tried getting my husband out the delivery room she said this was her baby she showed up at all times I tell her baby is sleeping she didn't Carr she tried doing pictures with my daughter before we could she went and got a tat before I could for my daughter she acted like this was her daughter she only has two boys. She stepped on my toes all the time its been more then a year since we seen or talked to her she didn't get the point even when we tried talking to her point black she is crazy. We never told her about my second pregnancy and doesn't know I'm pregnant again happy to have her out my life she made motherhood and being a new wife harder and stressful
  • kara_lamekkara_lamek
    My mother in law doesn't speak english. Even though she has lived in america for 33 years. She always thinks she knows everything. She said she knew I was pregnant before I told her.... I just hit 5 weeks today. I told them a week ago.. I haven't put any weight on yet. She's crazy. But she is saying I need to do all these things and im like no. His parents arent excited.. I think it has to do with me being white and them being a different race... it makes me so angry.. she said he should be with an asian woman who cooks and cleans everyday... sorry but I work from 2 to 10:30 at night so I don't have time... I hate his whole family honestly. Ughh.
  • vette_devilvette_devil
    @debs... I really get what you went through with your MIL & I totally agree... my MIL told me 3 TIMES while I was pregnant with my first that she kept dreaming that I died & she had to raise my baby- then after my daughter was born, she went even crazier & talked about my mothering behind my back to his whole family among other things... she also had 2 boys & always wanted a girl & I felt like she was really hoping I'd die! It was horrible...
  • mom2be0529mom2be0529
    I'm scares Cuz I'm only gona be 19 when my baby is born and I feel like because I'm young, my bf's mom is going to try to take over everything.... she already does and I barely see her! And @Kara_lamek ... I know how you feel... my bf's mom is old generation Dominican and she just speaks Spanish and he told me in the beginning she was upset that we went out Cuz I'm white.... technically I'm half Spanish but I grew up with my Italian family so I never had any reason to speak Spanish....and I think she also feels I should play the housewife role but I work almost the same hrs you do.... I understand how you feel but if your Guy sticks by your side then don't even dwell on her too much
  • kara_lamekkara_lamek
    My guy told her to f off lol he got so mad cuz she made me cry. I hate the language barrier but you live in america... speak english.. that's just my opinion. But my parents tried to introduce themselves one day and all they did was say hey then start talking in cambodian. Its rude. Ughh. But my man sticks by my side all the way. I got very lucky on that one.. cuz usually he's easily influenced.
  • islandgirlislandgirl
    My mother in law prolly mad cuz she likes the x but not me. She freakn talk shit behind my back with my bf x and I juz hate it so much. Im juz glad im out of her damn place cuz I don't need any negative things. I wanna feel comfortable and not b worried about her gettin mad that im pregnant.
  • islandgirlislandgirl
    Im an islander and my bf is white.
  • mom2be0529mom2be0529
    That's my opinion also... like if you want to speak in your language at home or to your friends then that's perfectly fine but if you're here you should at least know English Cuz love has no face... it doesn't care what language or race you are and it'll suck if you can't communicate with your extended family.... but I hope everything works out for you
  • jcmommyjcmommy
    My husband and I are both Asian. We're both very americanized and they are very traditional. It doesn't matter what race you are, mother in laws are all horrible! Haha.
  • islandgirlislandgirl
    Yes they r. I love my own mother she so supportive and lovin. But don't care bout my mother in law anymore cuz its time for me to stand up on my own fuckn feet. Good luck to u all!
  • VictoriaBVictoriaB
    After reading all these, I'm soooooo glad my mother in law is totally cool! When my husband told her I used to be a pothead, she just said, "oh, good for you honey." Lol! I'd think that once the family meets the baby, they would come around to you also. Good luck!
  • islandgirlislandgirl
    Pls pray for me cuz im cryin after readin a message from my mother in law. It hurts it really does.
  • VictoriaBVictoriaB
    Aww! Extra good luck to you, islandgirl! Just be strong and remember that you don't have to put up with her crap.
  • kara_lamekkara_lamek
    Good luck to all. Its horrible to have negative feedback from in laws. Im just happy my parents aren't like that to him. If they were we wouldn't make it. It would be overwhelming. Im glad we all have a place to vent and get comfort:)
  • ginmae78ginmae78
    edited January 2011
    Does anyone not have problems with their mom in law? ;-) if so, I'm jealous!
  • heather1115heather1115
    The only bad part about my bf's mother is that she speaks absolutely no english..so I can't even communicate with her
  • septemberbubseptemberbub
    Going through the same probs , my bf hasn't even told his mum yet :(
  • LizzC0325LizzC0325
    My mother in law is amazing. Shes loved me since the beginning which is a surprise since she always wanted him to be with a Mexican girl, I'm white very white. Lol. Its his step father that I absolutely hate! Nothing is ever good enough for that man. Usually my hubby wont say anything to him. But he got home yesterday and I was crying about something his dad said a little earlier. So my husband called him and told him if he was going to act like that he wouldn't be aloud over.
  • debsdebs
    Not only have I had problems with my mother in-law but I have problems with my step mother in-law also after we lost our son in July she told me that I need to get over it and move on and my husband worked weekends until a month ago and she would put on fb that the family that matters are spending the holiday with them my husband had to work holidays don't you think I want him home. So glad my family isn't like this they love my husband
  • vette_devilvette_devil
    Geez, @ debs, you poor thing! I can't even IMAGINE 2 horrible MIL's!!! My MIL told his family I control my husband (not even close to true, I have to watch myself b/c I'm a total pushover!) And that I'm a 'stingy' mom with my baby & wouldn't let anyone hold her... um, no... I just don't shove my baby on people if they don't want to hold her & that's exactly what she was like. I found that out at a family potluck when one of his aunts asked to hold her & said she was surprised because she wasn't sure I'd let her! I was like "why on earth would you think that?!?"
  • debsdebs
    It sucks but my husband and his brother have problems with their mother and mother in law I almost went crazy but bite my tongue when my daughter was .born and his step mom gave my new born butter to suck off crab meat who does that but they all say they love ne so much more then his ex I wonder how I would get treated if they didn't like me. I wish I had MIL's that I liked his dad is great but he gets treated like crap and can't stand up to his wife or ex
  • vette_devilvette_devil
    My father in law is great, too, and thinks I am the best cook in the world & I can do no wrong in his eyes- I love the man! Its weird, too, because my husband said he was a jerk when they were growing up... anyway, yeah, my MIL is the same way - tells me how wonderful she thinks I am & how much she loves me- sometimes I think I would rather she just treated me the way she really feels because I can't take the two-faced-ness!!!
  • islandgirlislandgirl
    Man mine is freakn aweful! When im around shell talk to me nicely and hug me but when im not there she talk shit behind my back. She likes to talk to my bf's ex about me and say all those aweful stuff. I juz wish she will b more lovin rather than pretendin like she love me. But im glad im far away from here cuz I don't wanna b stress cuz its not good for my baby. Im juz prayin that God will help me and keep me away from temptation.
  • secondlilcrittersecondlilcritter
    My mother in law hasb hated me since the moment she laid eyes on me! I wish I had a video camera they day she opened that door and saw a dominican girl who looks white cause I have very pale skin and really blonde hair. My husband is black and we have a beautiful little girl and another on the way. My family has taken my family like if he was born one of us. His family wants nothing to do with me for no reason. I tired so many times but a year ago decided screw them they lose. We do everything with my family and are happy. If they ever decide to join us I will accept them but until then she looses her son and graqndchildren. I look at like this she has nothing of mine!
  • randaandryanrandaandryan
    Can't stand mine either..constantly in our business when she comes over she will go through our mail. If she can't get ahold of us on our phones she will come over. and we were living with her awhile back with our 2 kids and we were bickering and she told me I could take MY son and leave her house if I didn't like what she was saying, and my husband doesn't believe me that she said that. She's always saying that were not gonna make it when we fight even though we've been married for 4 years now. And she always says onest instead of once......its annoying and she has a very annoying voice and its loudddd.
  • mamanicemamanice
    My husband and I have been married almost three years night before our wedding she tried talking him out of it she has spread rumors our child is not his I cheat I'm a whore and so on his sister also is involved in all this well I had enough I confronted them and they had nothing to say when I confronted them I refuse to talk to them and have not for two years some people just don't deserve to be a part of your life even if they are related who needs the drama good luck
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