@Mimii36 Don't get me wrong I see it from her side but on average I work 160hrs in 2wks plus help her parents out all the time. When I am awake the kids are my responsibility and I do all school and kindy drop off and pick ups whether I have slept or not. Last week I had 8 hours sleep in 5 days and she gets that and more in 1 night a bub sleeps 9pm til 7am every night.
I help as much as possible but in a high stress high risk job like mine I also have to try be alert lol
My hubby helps with everything on weekends and when he gets home from work (i'm a sahm) he gets up to an hour to transition (sometimes he needs it from traffic and the day) then it is daddy quality time and I do dinner and chores I can't get done during day. Sunday- Thursday night he sleeps in guest room (my idea) so I know he gets enough sleep and not falling asleep at wheel or work next day and Friday/ Saturday nights he does feedings at night. he changes diapers every chance he gets (bc he found this article: http://www.babyzone.com/baby/nurturing/baby_week_by_week/article/week-12-baby and says he doesn't want her to have daddy issues) and is wonderful I know I am lucky and we split everything as much as possible. He thinks my job is harder!!!
I wish I could be a sahm and finish school but I think he should help there are just some things that I am just not WILLING to do like take out trash I don't care how tiring work was. Also I just do not agree with cooking a full coarse meal then having to wash the dishes especially when I have been on mama duty all day and night
I'm different I believe he should always help with kids but he shouldn't have to come home n clean n cook yes sahm may be hard but that's the job u took n if your man work mornings why should he have to get up through the night when u gone be at home all day!
Here's how my life goes: I only work 3 days a week as a hairstylist. My bf works 40 hrs a week as a commercial electrician. My Mom watches the baby while I work til he gets home then he takes over. Except Saturday when he's with her all day while I work. I really don't expect him to do household chores other than mowing the lawn and shoveling snow. And any other things that are too hard for me to do. Because I work so little the housework is like the other part of my job. I wouldn't want him asking me to go out and work his job so I don't ask him to do mine lol. I'm lucky though he's extremely laid back and doesn't care if the house isn't perfect. I guess I'm a little old fashioned but I think I have it a lot easier than he does. He sits with Tessa while I do stuff though so it does make it easier. Oh and I never make him get up in the middle of the night. He gets up at 5:45 and the earliest I'm ever up is 8 lol.
@xFirstTimeMomx ahh i'm sorry hun...baby isn't here so idk how much of help my bf will be then. but everynight she wakes up when i am going to bed and he said when shes here he will stay up with her if shes up. i am planning on breastfeeding so i don't think he could help much with waking up for her to feed lol
I believe everything should be 50/50 even though my man works and I stay at home and handle the household. But I would love to find a good job so I could help him with bills and stuff.
@Hot2Cold87 its 50/50 because he gets days off & you dont. Being a SAHM is 24/7. Its still a job even if it doesnt bring in money. People do volunteer work all the time & dont bring in money! That doesnt mean its not work. I feel like my job at home is just as demanding as his at his workplace. Ive worked every since I could..im just on maternity leave now. So I know work is tiring but so is staying home doing work. I dont see whats unfair about him helping out every now & then. Ive been on both sides of that fence. THIS IS JUST MY OPINION!
@Mimii36 I NEVER SAID IT WASNT HARD WORK TRUST ME I KNOW BUT IMO IF HE WASNT THERE U WOULD HAVE TO WORK N STILL DO IT ANYWAY!! I NEVER SAID HE SHOULDN'T HELP!! N IMO ITS NOT 50/50 BECAUSE BEING A FATHER IS JUST LIKE A MOTHER 24/7! IF A MAN HAS TO WORK COOK CLEAN N TAKE CARE OF THE KIDS WTH DO HE NEED U FOR!? N THAT WAS NOT DIRECTED TOWARDS YOU SO DONT TAKE IT PERSONAL I JUST HAVE A DIFFERENT VIEW ON THE SITUATION U ASK FOR OPINIONS DID U NOT?!
@Hot2Cold87 wait a minute! I think you took my comment the wrong way. I in NO way meant it in a smart way. Im sorry you took it that way. I didnt have a problem with your opinion at all! I asked for everyones opinion because I wanted them..yours included. I was just answering your question about the 50/50 thing. I didnt know you didnt want me to answer it. I wasnt taking anything personal by NO means. I apologize.
My partner works spilt shifts so is home s few hours in the middle of the day. He does the food shopping and cooking is 50/50... Mainly cos my cooking sucks lol and I ask that if I havent had time for a shower that he watch the baby so I can. If I have had a tough week we will spend an hour on the weekend cleaning up together, but as long as we have clean clothes and dishes to eat from the rest can wait. I would rather spend time with him than have him off cleaning
@Mimii36 lol I did take that wrong then sorry this is text but I respect a sahm Im not trying piss no one off I'm just more in favor of the man I guess n I been on both sides n I rather work b/c of the work but IMO that's just apart of the job .
oh trust me...i rather work also! I hate being on maternity leave! I could never be a SAHM by choice.& its ok..sometimes typing doesnt always deliver a clear message as to what you really mean. @Hot2Cold87
@xFirstTimeMomx u have to do what makes u happy I think a man should always help with the kids regardless they are still fathers n plus I think that they need that time to bond anyway since a lot of men work a lot and they already missing so much I just don't agree with getting up in through the night n have to go to work in the morning as far as helping with the kids but spending time and helping b4 bedtime yes.
My husband works 40hours a week and is a pastor of a church so he preaches on Sundays.. I am a stay at home mom but we split the house work right down the middle. He puts the laundry in the washer/drier I fold, he puts them up. He cooks, I do all the cleaning up after meals. He cleans kitchen floor, I clean the rest of the rooms floors. He brings the groceries in, I put them away. I get the trash together, he takes it to the road. I never have to ask.him to do anything, its just understood that everything is a team effort. It works out great.
@xFirstTimeMomx aww well that suck he definitely should be helping you have u tried talking to him it sounds like he doesn't help because he doesn't want to not because he tired from work
Comments
Don't get me wrong I see it from her side but on average I work 160hrs in 2wks plus help her parents out all the time. When I am awake the kids are my responsibility and I do all school and kindy drop off and pick ups whether I have slept or not.
Last week I had 8 hours sleep in 5 days and she gets that and more in 1 night a bub sleeps 9pm til 7am every night.
I help as much as possible but in a high stress high risk job like mine I also have to try be alert lol
Here's how my life goes: I only work 3 days a week as a hairstylist. My bf works 40 hrs a week as a commercial electrician. My Mom watches the baby while I work til he gets home then he takes over. Except Saturday when he's with her all day while I work. I really don't expect him to do household chores other than mowing the lawn and shoveling snow. And any other things that are too hard for me to do. Because I work so little the housework is like the other part of my job. I wouldn't want him asking me to go out and work his job so I don't ask him to do mine lol. I'm lucky though he's extremely laid back and doesn't care if the house isn't perfect. I guess I'm a little old fashioned but I think I have it a lot easier than he does. He sits with Tessa while I do stuff though so it does make it easier. Oh and I never make him get up in the middle of the night. He gets up at 5:45 and the earliest I'm ever up is 8 lol.
People do volunteer work all the time & dont bring in money! That doesnt mean its not work. I feel like my job at home is just as demanding as his at his workplace. Ive worked every since I could..im just on maternity leave now. So I know work is tiring but so is staying home doing work. I dont see whats unfair about him helping out every now & then. Ive been on both sides of that fence. THIS IS JUST MY OPINION!