im having my bestfriends baby

bambam

I'm 6 months pregnant and me and my bestfriend of 3 years are having a baby! We're both pretty excited but we're not together. However he has a girlfriend. And that alone makes my emotions run wild seeing as how I still love him. Not to mention My living situiation is not exactly the best at the moment either. I'm 18 and just left my grandmothers house because of the stress. And as we all know its important NOT to be stressed during this time. But I'm staying at a friends house and plan on applying for government aid and possibly housing. My only concern is what am I going to do once this baby gets here <:/. My bestfriend/babydaddy works but let's just say he doesn't keep his paychecks long. It either goes to his grandparents to help pay rent (which in my opinion is bullshit) or its gas money. And sometimes it goes to his girlfriend >:P and I can't work at the moment, I'm already in my 6th month and have tried applying. Truth is nobody will hire anyone pregnant! I'm really stuck! Help please <:(

BbysMomma

Is he planing to tell his gf his having a bby wit u? Is he planing to help u out or b wit u?

allylou77

You are in a complicated situation, that's for sure! You need to work out where u will live once baby arrives, that's your priority for your babies safety. So, go to community organisions and see how they can help, with a baby involved, you should get priority assistance. Next, work out where u stand with your best friend / father to be. Will he be supporting his child, will he live with u, will he tell his girlfriend, what will his involvement be with his baby? Theres lots to consider!

bambam

The crazy thing is she knows. Shees known since they first started dating about 3 months ago. And he keeps telling me how she wants to help and be there and spport him and the baby. Which is kin of insulting to m becase that's my job as a mother. She can have a relationship with him, but as for our child that's none of her concern you know. Its just awkward to me. And he says he wants to be there and we spend a lot of time together. We're just not together. But I guess I'll see how dedicated he is to our baby once she gets here. But for my living arangemets does the govrnment really offer housing? Even if I'm not working?

mami2be

Wow...Umm well if ur in this messed up why not let the GF help u out? I mean ur not wrking an ur BD gives all his money away! How are u going too support the baby???

Mommyuv3

Yea they provide you with housing now some of them can be in some bad neighborhood because that's what I had to do cry before I walk. I was grateful due to the circumstance I had to do what was best for my growing family. Just like you I had to leave family member home your family can be more against you then the streets.

amomfirst

I get we all want a wonderful ending that the baby will put it back together . That is what I thought I was wrong I have two girls there dad and I were best friends and were going out but he had a life that let's say was not what I planned he dated other people even though I was prego he was there for the first daughter a little bit we lived together but other things were on top of his list the kid not really only when it worked out for him and his girlfriend I had my second daughter 17 months later when I relized there life came first and cut my emotional ties I got an income based apt look now before the baby is born u might have to be put on a list and help with what I could got a part time job and let him be a father if he wanted. You see u r the only constant thing people come and go you fall in and out of love places change jobs change but u are all the baby has. The girls dad and I are still friends he is married, I am married it made me a lot stronger it was a stressful time I slepted on friends couches and scraped by when I found a place when u get gov help they will just take child support out of his checks so u don't have to ask for money from him. It dose get better I said I would never have any more kids after the ride I was on but my life took a turn I am married with my third it is still a ride but it got better. Good luck and relize that this is the best thing u will find out how strong u are.

bambam

Thank you all for your advice Well things have seemed to have gotten better. I'm staying at my friends house now and my bestfriend/babydaddy is becoming more involved with my life again he still is with his gf....but I'm getting confused on out situiation. Its complicated none the less, but I am on some government assistance now. But my hormones are going CRAZY! <:&

bambam

Wow guys it seems like everyting is turning around for me. I'm in my third trimester and me and my bestfriend/babydaddy are going to work things out. He broke up with his girlfriend after one weekend we spent together. And it all just came out. Feelings and everything. Hopefully we can start a healthy family together, but I will always put my daughter first. Anybody have any advice? I feel I'm ready for a family.....but then again I'm still very young. What would be best for the baby? A mommy and a daddy around right?

mommy3

I'm very proud of you! You didn't give up! You've seemed very positive & confident.. & things seem to be turning around! If having a mommy & daddy is possible and its stable, that's exactly what she needs! & I'm so happy for you! Keep your head up & keep rising to the top!

rootzmama

@bambam yay for you! Thats awesome im glad u were paitent and understanding, and everything worked out for u hope ur lil family will be soo happy together

Nessa_MiasMommy

Awww good luck honey

bambam

Awwe thank you guys now that things are turning around I feel much more confidet and happy about getting ready for baby to get here don't get me wrong, I was always happy and preparing myself....but now I feel a tad more secure you guys feedback makes me happy too thank you<3