Your choice of discipline???

edited April 2011 in Parenting
How do you or how do you plan to discipline your child? Just curious as to how mothers and mothers to be choose to discipline... I myself dnt plan on spanking my child... I'll like to try other methods. I personally dnt think physical discipline gets the point across in the long run... Any other opinions??
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  • edited April 2011
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  • I do timeout or take somethin they love away
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  • edited April 2011
    @karla_with_a_k thats what I'm planning on doing. It works when I babysit so hopefully it'll work with my own. @mama0811 lol
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  • edited April 2011
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  • I dnt disagree with spanking.. I've just seen other family members and friends spank their kids for doing something and then maybe a few min later their child is either doing the same thing our something else they know they shouldn't be doing. So I just thought maybe spanking was not the best solution... This will be my first so the only experience I have is babysitting
  • I got spanked as a child and also praised a lot( @isaiahnjocelynsmommy completely agree!) when I was a kid and I respect my elders and do as I was told, I will spank when necessary but not out of anger just like @mama0811 said. I believe that beating and disciplining your children are two different things but it does depend on the person. Do what you think is best, I just know I will not deal with a child that acts like a wildman lol (not saying you have to spank to achieve this, but so many parents try to be friends or talk to them like they have the capability to fully understand doesn't always work)
  • Ill deff be spanken my kids, my mom did for me n my brother and we turned out good ppl who know right from wrong never got in truble cuz we knew better lol
  • I found taking away privelages and toys or things he was attached to was a HUGE success. For instance, I will ask him to do something once. If he doesn't do it the first time in an appropriate manner, I simply remind him. If after that it still isn't done, I take away the distraction (TV, DS, toy, etc.) and tell him he may have it back once he's done. He gets it done very quickly, and we go about our day.

    If we're in public, all I have to do is give him "the eye" or start counting. We usually only get to 1, every so often we get to 2, and we've never had to get to 3 lol. He knows what 3 is, and 3 has only been reached a handful of times at home, and that's usually when a good swat on his back end comes into play. Also, being consistant with punishments help. If you tell them "No cartoons when we get home", follow through with it every time. That way, they KNOW you're serious when you "threaten" them.

    As @isaiahnjocelynsmommy says, different things work for different people. Just remember that kids don't generally understand the reason you raise your voice. They don't communicate the yelling with being angry. I read that until they're about 4, raising your voice doesn't really do a whole lot. I also think that getting down to their level (physically bending down or sitting them where they have eye contact with you) helps.

    I am no know it all lol, but this all works for me. I've gotten pretty lucky with a well mannered kid, but I think a lot of persistance really does work. Good luck to you! :D
  • @akmommy I agree with them not fully understanding. My mom didn't spank me. All she had to do was like look at me a certain way and I knew I was in trouble.. Lol idk if it was because I wasnt super bad or if I was just a scary kid... The only spanking I've seen is like severe... Some parents take it over board.
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  • Thats true some do take it overboard and thats truly sad. My mom def spanked me but when I hit like 7 or 8 I knew what I could get away with and I knew my mom didn't play games lol. She didn't do it a lot but she let me know what was up lol
  • I witnessed a lady smack her daughter in the mouth for walking too slow... She had to be only like three... The other daughter started crying and backing away because she was scared she would get hit next....
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  • Ahhh it's so sad to read about kids who fear their parents in that manner. Children should feel safe and secure with their parents, not like they've got to watch what they do and say or else they're going to get physically harmed. SMH :-S
  • edited April 2011
    @isaiahdjocelynsmommy I'm sorry to hear that... @bke913 that is so true!
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  • That brings tears to my eyes... No child should ever have to go through that!
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  • I was also abused as a child and it ultimately led to me and my brothers being taken away from our mother and placed in foster homes. I learned what not to do from my mother. I believe that a combination of positive reinforcement and spanking when needed is key. I don't plan to pop my child in the mouth when he smarts off but I'm not above painting his back porch red when he needs it. There is a difference between abuse and discipline. The reason there are so many punks and thugs running around now is because alot of their parents were to afraid to spank. My child will never have to walk on egg shells in fear of being hurt by me but he will fear me in a sense. If my child gets sent home from school one day for acting a fool and isn't afraid of the consequencea awaiting him when he gets home, then I'm not doing my job.
  • I wouldn't say that being afraid to spank your child will result in the reason why they turn out to be a thug... Me being black, a lot of black parents spank their kids and it had no effect on their wrong doing as an adult... I only said blacks because thats all I can really speak about... Idk about other races....
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  • edited April 2011
    I don't see how a persons race has anything to do with how they effectively discipline a child but okay :/ I'm sorry to say but the MAJORITY of thugs, punks, and juvenile delinquents are a result in lack of discipline and home training from the parents (along with other variables), black parents, white parents, purple parents. Its all the same. I never said if you don't spank your kid he'll turn into a thug, I was simply trying to make a point that DISCIPLINE could prevent it and apparently forgot this is pregly and you have to include a disclaimer every time you give your opinion.

    Every kid is different, but I'l be damned if I have a kid who calls me a "bitch" in the grocery store cuz I wouldn't buy his ass a candy bar. Bust his butt the first time that happens and something tells me it'll be the last.

    DISCLAIMER: I'm not saying beat your kids folks. I'm also not saying if you spank a kid he'll turn out perfect. I realize every kid, parent and situation is different. I also realize that some punks/thugs had good parents.
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