feel like a bad parent either way!!

tbaby2011

I feel like my heart was crushed I am on bedrest and I am only allowed up to go to bathroom. So I have been having to let my mom and grandma and family members watch and take care of my 2 yo daughter. Well I have had her since Saturday and I can't exactly take very good are of her in a bed or on couch the whole time and my finance helps bit he works second shift so I had to try on my own to do it. And I was told by my doctor I was not listening to his directiomy ns well enough and if I continue to not listen I could put my baby at risk and go into full blown labor ( im almost 24.wks). So I broke down and sent my daughter to my moms. She just left and she was crying and screaming for me and held on to my neck so tight I felt like I couldn't breathe. I feel like I am choosing this new baby over my daughter but if I don't send her with someone I can't follow my bedrest instructions and am putting her over the baby. I feel its a lose, lose situation and I feel like a bad mom either way! Idk just thought I would share my heart break!

[Deleted User]

No you're not really putting the new baby before her bc of you don't follow what u were directed to do you'll probably have your baby too early and you don't want that, I'm sure. It's just a temporary situation so take it easy and relax!! :-)

lovemylife11

well the one ur carring needs you more than you lil girl it sounds bad but you got to do whatever is best for the baby ur doing it right i would have done the same thing

mommyto1soontob2

Aww no ur doctor has orders to save this baby from commin It's different. She's at tht age to be needy and u can't help that. Just relax gettin upset don't help either. That's what family is for. Why can't ur mom stay with u. Or u stay with her so you can be with ur daughter? That way ur around her

blessedbe_x3

Oh hunny! Just think of it this way. Not only are you putting the unborn baby at risky but your putting your daughter at risk. I don't know about your 2yr old but my 2yr old can't be trusted. If I take my eyes off him for 1sec he's causing trouble. So by all means your not a bad mom! ! Your taking care of both babies! And thankfully you have your mom there for support!

tbaby2011

@mommyto1soontob2 I wish she could stay with me go help out but there isn't the room for her to have privacy at our house and she lives about 25 mins from town and the hospital I live about 5-10 mins away from hospital at most and my doctor advised me if I went to stay with someone for help since my man does work in evening that I should not leave city limits so I can reach hospital quickly in case of emergency. But she is planning on visiting with her every other day for a while and I will call her at least twice a day she just was so sad to leave.

laura536

If she's anything like my daughter, the crying probably stopped as soon as she was in the car with grandma. My daughter acts like I'm abandoning her everytime I try to leave her with her grandparents, but as soon as I'm gone, she's fine and then she never wants to leave when I go pick her up. Kids just love to make you feel guilty.

mrs_shu

Did you sit her down and explain what was going on before it happened? She will be fine. I bet once they were inbthe car she stopped crying. When you talk to her keep your voice up and positive and focus on all the fun things she may be doing with grandma

mommyto1soontob2

Aww man thts a pickle lol. Well ur taking care of both children. It's in her best in terest to be with someone. So ur a great mom for actually bein tied between the two children. Some ppl only care for one at a time. U love them both so ur an awsome mom!

tbaby2011

Thanks everyone for your support and making me feel a little less guilty.