mother-in-law advice

pnsw524

Ok so me & my MIL have never gotten along. Now that its been 5 years we are doing much better but after all the things her & her husband have said & done I just can't seem to forgive them & tou can just tell when we are all together that its a bit awkward... Anyway she out of the blue tells me the other day that she wants to throw my baby shower...

1 it confuses me because i didnt think she liked me enough to want to spend time or money on me.

2 I'm scared it will be so not my kind of party. I am a very laid back go with the flow person & she is way more up tight.

& 3 I am scared she is going to want to invite people that i do NOT want there

My husband really wants us to get along better & would like me to let her do it but i just dont know non of my family likes her & I don't want them or her for that matter feeling awkward at the party.

Advice on what to do? I want to do it for my husband but at the same time I just don't want her feeling like I owe her something for doing this or anything like that!

headersue

Look at it this way, you have someone that wants to GIVE you a baby shower, let her do it, also you are gonna get more stuff for your baby. I would just stand back and let her do whatever it is she wants to do, and you just show up and eat cake and open presents. If there are people there you don't want there, just don't talk to them.

jcmommy

Do it. If you don't let her, it gives her another reason to make your life a living Hell. But also do an opposite shower for your family and friends the way you like it.

lilbabythree

I agree with @jcmommy. My mil is the sameway. Very up tight and likes things to go her way. So I let het do her thing and just enjoy the people that I do like. Thank the ones I don't and move one. It is a few hours. It will make her feel important that she is doing something for her grandchild and helping u at the same time. And then have a shower for ur side of the family the way u would want.

gemini_babies

I agree with jcmommy. That's what I'm doing. I don't have problems with my MIL thank God, but she is throwing for my hubbys side of the fam and I'm having another for my side of the fam the way I like it. Of course my bff and cousins are planning that one. I too am laid back and like to sitback and enjoy the ride:)

survivormommie3

sadly, i have to agree with the ladies and say you should probably let loose and allow her to throw it. i know it's probably not what you want. just tell her you would be honored if she threw the shower, but you would also like to be part of it. this way it seems like its just that you want to be a part of it but you also know what to expect. she can always surprise you too. so you never know. but i hear you. while i have a great mother in law, and i think she could throw a good one, she just doesnt know certain things and i would rather keep it that way. granted i lived with the woman for 3 yrs and this is baby number 3. but good luck. keep us posted. i would love to know how it turns out.

pnsw524

Thanks ladies(@headersue @jcmommy @lilbabythree @gemini_babies @survivorMommie3 ) I knew what I needed to do but just needed reassurance! I'm gonna let her do it & even through its a little ways off i will defiantly let yall know how it goes!