Need advice about hubby please!!
For the last week my husband has been extremely edgy and downright mean. Everything annoys him. We went to a.birthing class where they said "let him do things his way and u do things ur way" as far as.feeding baby or whatnot. And he said he feels like I am snapping at him and criticizing him about everything. I am not. I know I am not. Even so I have been apologizing profusely and paying attention to what I'm saying and how I'm saying it for the last couple of days so I wouldn't annoy him. Still, he is just as mean and snappy as ever. He says its because he's.tired and I'm criticising him, but swear I'm not!! I'm trying extra hard to hardly even speak! I've stopped asking him for any help with anything at all because I just feel like I'm a burden to him now and that if I do ask it'll just be one more thing he'll say I'm doing that's annoying him. I'm due in less than a month and we still have stuff around here to get done that I just can't do because of my belly... I'm on the verge of tears and I feel like everything I'm doing is wrong. What else can I do?!? Is anyone else going through this??
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He also goes out golfing all the time with my oldest brother... In the last month he has gone out once a week... Then they come home drunk from the course and sit around watching tv or playing tiger woods golf on the xbox and drink until early morning...
I think he has plenty of freedom... I tell him he can go out anyway after he gets off work if he wants and he says no he'd rather come home. Or sometimes he stays after for a few beers. (He works in a bar) so Idk what more I can really do to try to accommodate him. Any ideas??
Oh yeah, and for the last 11 years he has delt with stress by smoking. So Idk of it truly is the prednisone making him irritable or if @Tammy is right and he's stressing out cuz.baby is almost here... But his parents are both TERRIBLE at handling stress and Always either smoke and/or take it out on whoever is closest to them at the time.... So I worry how he is going to handle the stress plus lack of sleep... :-( I don't think I can handle being screamed at all the time.
@podgemarine wow! Really?? that is insane. No wonder people relapse so often. Good job on a year and a half not smoking tho!! Idk if he is just saying it or not... They say the chantex is supposed to take away all urges to smoke, but Idk??
@Tammy haha if he isn't back to my hubby in a week its a deal!!
My husband is currently trying to quit smokin b.s. and after I read all that & 2 drs in my family plus the one my husband was going to said they would never proscribe it to people we changed our plan of attack!
Good luck & keep us posted!
i have taken prednisone many many times and the hot flashes and irritability i have goes through the freakin roof. it's terrible.
i would mention to hubby that you love him, regardless of whether you are getting on his nerves or "picking" at him isn't the point. you have done your best to darn well stop talking to him because you are upset and hurt you upset him. then tell him you are stressed with the baby coming and you need help with things so you are ready for when baby arrives. reveal the side effects of the meds he is on and discuss it. or just tell him and let him sit with the info for a while. either way you are stressing and it's not fair.
my husband got the same way with our first baby. so in addition to him being the only money maker and all the other stresses we had going on i could tell he was stressed. he usually is passive, but he was a tyrant before we had our first. some of it is probably his being a nervous wreck to. whenever i get to 36 wks is when my hubby darn near loses it and goes from "oh it's ok, it's just the baby" to "OMG is it time to go! is the bag ready? do we need to call you parents to come get the kids?!" every guy is different.
@survivormommie3 Thank u for ur advice. I did mention it to him today (in a very non accusing way) and he was very receptive. We had a lazy day today, just ate and cuddled together so nothing too crazy could make him agitated. I told him tho how I was worried it was the prednisone, possibly the chantix from what @pnsw524 was saying about chantix too.
I asked if he was nervous or stressed about anything, he said everything. >_< I asked if we could find a new way for him to deal with stress besides him smoking... Maybe running? The endorphines and such that working out releases... Hopefully we can find a way.
@jtmoon98 Good idea!! Mellow him out so he's slow grumpy!! Haha ill have to remember that if there is a next time.
@podgemarine Idk, it could be... I hope not!
@jtmoon98 haha REALLY good point! And makes for a.relaxing day