Is it normal to have these feelings?
Okay, so I'm 19 and got pregnant when I was 18. I'm due january 1st and I'm 26 weeks pregnant. For a while now, I've had this feeling of being a failure. We moved to NC a year ago because my husband joined the AF. I had a job at home, but wasnt able to get one when I was here. I applied to some places but nothing worked out. I put of school for a semester so I would be able to move with my husband, and then went earlier this year for spring semseter. I didnt go to school for summer or fall because they didnt have the classes that I needed.
I just feel like I'm letting my husband and my son down... I mean, I dont even know what I want my career to be, and I dont know how I'm going to be able to go to college with a new baby... My husband will be deploying next year and I just dont know what to do... I feel like I should be working so that way we have more money and will be able to comfortable afford everything that my son will need. I mean even right now we live paycheck to paycheck... I'm just super depressed. Dont get me wrong, I love my son and I love that I'm pregnant. Honestly, right now, hes probably the only reason that I want to wake up in the morning.. Just to feel his kicks and twists and turns... Other than my son, nothing makes me happy and I'm just utterly miserable. Anyone have similar feelings or going through the same thing?
On top of that, I feel like an awful wife because between pregnancy symptons and depression I just dont give a crap about the way our house looks or if laundry gets done.. I find it all kinda pointless because I dont know how it will make me feel better... I also feel bad about my body... Im 223 pounds and I have millions of strechmarks all over my body... I've never felt so lowly in my entire life... My husband works 12 hours a day to being home a paycheck... He doesnt like his job because its an extremely stressful environment... and instead of helping him I feel like I'm just drowning both of us in my self pity
I just feel like I'm letting my husband and my son down... I mean, I dont even know what I want my career to be, and I dont know how I'm going to be able to go to college with a new baby... My husband will be deploying next year and I just dont know what to do... I feel like I should be working so that way we have more money and will be able to comfortable afford everything that my son will need. I mean even right now we live paycheck to paycheck... I'm just super depressed. Dont get me wrong, I love my son and I love that I'm pregnant. Honestly, right now, hes probably the only reason that I want to wake up in the morning.. Just to feel his kicks and twists and turns... Other than my son, nothing makes me happy and I'm just utterly miserable. Anyone have similar feelings or going through the same thing?
On top of that, I feel like an awful wife because between pregnancy symptons and depression I just dont give a crap about the way our house looks or if laundry gets done.. I find it all kinda pointless because I dont know how it will make me feel better... I also feel bad about my body... Im 223 pounds and I have millions of strechmarks all over my body... I've never felt so lowly in my entire life... My husband works 12 hours a day to being home a paycheck... He doesnt like his job because its an extremely stressful environment... and instead of helping him I feel like I'm just drowning both of us in my self pity
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@314babymama1120 I've been trying to clean the house for 3 days... I start in the kitchen.. then I just feel overwhelmed and feel like its all pointless... I just start crying and give up... I do atleast make dinner and pack his lunches though... So he doesnt starve atleast lol
I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. I dont' work or go to school either. I'm 21. Got married at 20, moved 2 hours away from my family, put off school, and ended up getting pregnant 30 days after getting married. My husband is wonderful but sometimes I feel like you do when I look around and think.. wow all I do with my life is sit on the couch. I know its hard, but when these little babies get here, we will have a purpose. Keep your head up dear.
@1stwoodsbaby I like in Goldsboro, about an hour east of raleigh! Thank you! I try and think about my son and how in 3 months Ill be the most important person to him! Thanks for the support and advice
@lilbit01_209 @314babymama1120 I have a trip home in a few weeks. Ill see if it helps push me out of this rut. If not, then Ill talk to my doctor as soon as I get back! Thanks for listening and for offering advice!