Need some advice..

jay_brad

My son will be 4months old the 8th of January as most moms already know it is a hassle to bring babies this age group out and about by yourself. Meanwhile my fiance is OBSESSED with deer hunting and it bothers me soo much that he leaves me twice a day to go... I try not to take it personal,but I'm stuck at home w my little man n just wish my s/o was there with us..I know its only a few months out of the year but it still bothers me I need advice or words of encouragment..cause its to the point that I'm beginning to b depressed..I wake up in the morning for my fiance n baby brax..n in the morning my fiance is deer hunting! That's all o ever hear is deer deer deer!! Help! X_X

LilSugarsMomma

Have you told him, in a pleasant way, hoe it bothers you? I would politely address the issue, but be stern about it. He needs to fulfill his parent time with the baby, and help you. You're not a single mother, so you shouldn't have to do the work of one! Tell him you need his help, both for your sake and your child's. Also, ask him if he gets his fun time, then you most certainly are entitled to fun time as well!

LilSugarsMomma

*tell - not ask. Haha

natashalynn

You gotta explain it to him, he probably doesn't understand how it bothers you. Communication is key in any relationship especially one with a child involved. And this is a significant time in Babys life, rolling and cooing are happening, & he shouldn't want to miss that. If he complains about missing the deer, ask which he'd rather miss, deer, which will be there next season, or his kids milestones that won't happen again.

drgonzo523

Sweetheart I wish I had some advice for you but unfortunately I don't. I can however tell u you're not alone. I am dealing with the exact same thing. My hubby has gone hunting 4 times in the past week and doesn't see a damn thing wrong with it. It pisses me off beyond belief because our two month old daughter cries all the time and wants to be held constantly and even when he is here he rarely helps with her. I wish he would spend more time with us for our four year old son's sake. It is extremely difficult to take care of a screaming infant and a little boy who wants love and attention at the same time. I wish our hubbies would take their heads out of their butts and start participating in our daily lives. *hugs*

jay_brad

@natashalynn I've tried n he tells me that I knew he hunted before we got together n he's not going to stop...
@drgonzo523 I'm sorry hun it stinks! I've talked n talked to him about it until I'm blue n the face but he says he loves doing it n not going to stop ..he goes 2times a day n stays gone like 4hrs each time..it really bothers me..he says he'll slow down but its still a lot..

jay_brad

@lilsugarsmomma I've tried .. & i never do fun time cause when my s/o is actually home I want to spend time w our son

My2Boys

@jay_brad has it gotten any better? I have to deal with the same problems, our son is 3 years old and our new baby boy is going to be 4 months on January 13th, it drives me NUTS! I HATE hunting season, and he goes archery and rifle seasons. I dread the season and it is even worse that it is always around the boys birthdays (sept 3 and sept 13). He cut back since we have had the boys but he still goes a lot. I think the worse part is he ALWAYS is talking about it and showing me this and that and talking about some shots, its annoying. I almost secretly hope our boys dont like to go hunting... haha that is mean, but I would rather them want to go out with me then hunting with daddy when they are older. Especially because all hubby talks about is "I cant wait until I can take them and they see there first deer..."

newmomma13

Girl o hanger the danger problem except mine doesn't go hunting lol he likes to go to his ”boys” house and be home all day till like freaking 2 on the morning and when he comes home o give him attitude then he tries and flip the whole situation and get mad because I'm mad at him lol

Mimii36

When he is home does he help out? If he does then I think you should cut him some slack. (Just my opinion) If hunting is something he has always done and he enjoys it so much then I would let him have that time for himself. If you take that from him he will just be home unhappy because he rather be hunting.

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My2Boys

@Mimii36 I agree to a point, but if he wants to go hunting all the time that leaves her alone with kids all the time. How is that fair? If she loved to go shopping and went twice a day for four hours at a time, you know the guy would flip. I think you guys should come to an agreement. My hubby and I agreed that we would try and split up our time evenly between doing what each of us likes to do, housework, working, getting to spend time with each kid, and getting time together. My hubby tried to pull the whole "you know I have always liked hunting since I was a kid" excuse and I told him yea well I also liked to do what I want since I was a kid. Once you have kids you should still get to do what you enjoy, but at the same time getting to go do what you want all the time and just rely on your spouse to take care of the kids is not fair.

Mimii36

@my2boys I completely agree. They should be fair and she should be able to have free time too. But her original post says she upset because she just wants him home with her. She didn't really complain about wanting her own free time. So that's where my opinion came from. Everybody has things they like to go do without their SO. Maybe this is his. And its only for a couple months. Idk..that's just my opinion.

My2Boys

@Mimii36 yea that makes sense too

jay_brad

@mimii36 @my2boys it got better..but only cause deer season has ended n he's already talking about...guess what ...TURKEY SEASON!! Fml! But yes he helps...BUT to a certain extent.. not a lot AT ALL ...u see I'm not complaining "about" deer season I'm complaining that its all about him!! He's soo spoiled! I used to tan everyday...n go out w my girls but do I now?? No cause when he IS home I'd like to spend it w my fiance n our son..instead of leave..but no not him..its all about hunting n basketball ...in between hunting its basketball ..so uh. Where is my free time?? Let me answer for you.. NEVER! I'm not a bitch I'm just annoyed... n YES! !! @mom2boys that's all he talks about!! Deer deer...Buck Buck...gun..gun...bass pro ...bow n arrow...doe...deer chili..need a new gutting knife..lets mount another deer...

-.-

jay_brad

I'd like to give him credit for what he DOES do....he helps....WHEN I ASK.. but that doesn't mean that he is happy about it... complain complain...I had a Dr apt this morning so therefore at 9 I handed my son which was ASLEEP to sleep w his daddy..after I did all the work of feeding him getting ready myself blah... he still whines about having to ...what?? Roll over?? Geez!

jay_brad

@mom2boys my s/o ALSO plays the "u knew I deer hunted" card n it drives me nuts ..yeah I knew u deer hunted ..BUT hello!! We have baby now!! Its not all about you now buddy! N we are engaged ..he needs to REALIZE in marriage u COMPROMISE!

brodysmamma

Girl I get it. When I told Brandon I wanted him.to stay home and hang out with me and Brody he wanted to take Brody with said I could have me time. Um no Brody was 2 months old. For once I'm glad hunting season is over. Doesn't change the weekends and him wanting to get drunk and build shit lol. Although we do have brand new shelves in our garage. We'll see what this weekend brings. When our babies get bigger it will get better right now they don't think its very exciting to.be a parent. When the walking and talking starts we'll never get our babies back our men will have em. Teaching them to Hunt and stuff. I say as frustrating as it is soak it up before our sons are more into their daddies and less into us.