@wilsomom You know, with your incredibly passive aggressive attitude, it's not such a mystery to me anymore why your teenagers are lashing out at you. The tighter the leash, the harder they pull.
Holy uncalled for...remember we are here to support eachother. You dont have to agree, but you shouldnt be outright rude either. Everyone has their own way, to each their own....
@starrxoxo9 What was passive aggressive about my comment? I was talking about my little kids, I certainly don't do that with the teenagers. If you're talking about the last sentence of my comment, it was a joke, I was trying to be funny & lighten things up a bit. I thought we were past that so I was just kidding. And I wasn't personally attacking you, I was just talking to everyone in general.
@starrxoxo9 do you allow your child to wander around where you can't see or hear her? Probably not...so how is that a short lease?? That's protecting them and ensuring they are safe
I'm not even gonna get into it, because it will be a never ending debate. I'm not talking about keeping kids safe. Obviously I keep my child safe. Give me a break...
My kids aren't dumb. Lol. They know what cleaning means. I'm asking of ways to help them understand why chores are important, and ways to motivate them to do it. I simply do not have time to force them to do it while I'm watching. Whether if it's for an hour or days. It isn't feasible in my home. I completely agree with @starrxoxo9 (our parenting styles are pretty much the same, rewards for good behavior work better for us than punishment). I don't know why it keeps getting mentioned for me to basically force them to do it, because I already said that it won't work for my family. I don't want the kids to feel like I'm all of a sudden being mean to them when they've done nothing wrong. I am glad that works for you, we all find something that works for our children. Thank you though. @wilsomom
They did their first chores today and they loved it! The smiles and self satisfaction they had was awesome!! My girls are actually happy to help mommy out! :x
I'm not forcing them them either, we do it together & have fun. It's just a way we spend positive time together. Me & my 5 youngest (besides the baby) just got done cleaning up the kitchen after dinner while singing Aiken Drum, running outside to look at the full moon, noticing Venus while out there, & discussing the planets while finishing the dishes & sweeping. Lol
I'm glad you found something that works! I'm always trying new things. Lol
Just because someone does things differently does not make it wrong...do what works for you and your family and home. No need for insults or low jabs. It's the holiday season, let us play nice :-)
@fate thank you, I knew you'd understand what I meant.
@everyone else It wasn't an insult or a low blow. It's the truth. Everyone parents differently yes, but wrong is wrong and unlike every other day on here where I keep my mouth shut today I decided to say something. Every child is a product of their environment. Period. Babies are born innocent and without harmful thoughts or feelings. Yes, some people CAN be born predisposed to mental illness, but that's rarely the case. Every situation, every action, every word, even every tone of voice has a TREMENDOUS effect on a child. And forcing a child to be one way or the other will INEVITABLY end in disaster. In my experience, 9 out of 10 parents won't admit to any wrong doing because they're simply ignorant to it. And that's just the way life is and why I hardly go into stuff like this.
And when I say wrong doing, it can be the smallest thing to most people, like scolding them in an embarrassing way, that can have a major impact on their life. For example, at a family gathering my aunt (who would NEVER be allowed around my daughter alone) scolded my 6 year old niece for chewing with her mouth open. She said "HEY! Close your mouth when you eat!" In front of everyone. And the look in my nieces eyes said it all. Right in that moment my aunt stole a piece of her innocence. My niece had a stuffy nose at the time and didn't even notice how she was eating. I felt so bad for her and wanted to punch my aunt in the face. And I guarantee from now on, she's going to be overly aware of herself when she eats,which is not natural.
Getting your child to clean isn't forcing them to be anything bit responsible for their own mess. (Although different strokes for different folks) Saying that they way others parent is wrong and going to inevitably end up in disaster sounds pretty ignorant to me. Not everything works or doesn't work for everyone.
Let's all turn a blind eye and do what "society" tells us is right. Haha no thanks. There are about a thousand things more important in my child's life than "getting her to clean". Lmfao.
And if your point wasn't in short that you're right and I'm wrong. And I'm gonna screw up my kid by getting her to pick up her toys, then yes, I definitely missed your point.
You basically said we were wrong for wanting to teach our children to be responsible by helping do household chores...if that wasn't your point, maybe you need to reword it
There's a huge difference between teaching a child and helping them grow as a person, and just teaching them something simply because you want them to do it because it makes your life easier.
No one ever said it makes life easier. My son is almost 5 and I believe he is now old enough to start cleaning up his room after he's done playing. I don't want him to grow up and get married thinking his wife will so it all because mom always did. He needs to be responsible for his things and the mess he makes.
Comments
They did their first chores today and they loved it! The smiles and self satisfaction they had was awesome!! My girls are actually happy to help mommy out! :x
I'm glad you found something that works! I'm always trying new things. Lol
@everyone else It wasn't an insult or a low blow. It's the truth. Everyone parents differently yes, but wrong is wrong and unlike every other day on here where I keep my mouth shut today I decided to say something. Every child is a product of their environment. Period. Babies are born innocent and without harmful thoughts or feelings. Yes, some people CAN be born predisposed to mental illness, but that's rarely the case. Every situation, every action, every word, even every tone of voice has a TREMENDOUS effect on a child. And forcing a child to be one way or the other will INEVITABLY end in disaster. In my experience, 9 out of 10 parents won't admit to any wrong doing because they're simply ignorant to it. And that's just the way life is and why I hardly go into stuff like this.