Men choose all the time not to be in a childs life i think they should still be responsible in some kinda way for the life they helped create
As for the abortion part idk about that at 18 i chose to have one even tho my bf at the time wanted to keep it. I knew it would have been a bad idea to keep and even tho it was hard and i had no support in doing it, it was the best thing i could have done and i don't regret it one bit he knows it now to and doesn't hate me for it
@ARand39. You are SO very right hon. They are taken to court, their kids are given to the mother, and then they have to pay her for taking his kids. If he doesn't he goes to jail. This happens a lot especially in military families and there have been a lot of cases in which the man commits suicide. He can barely be with his kids, and then he can't even provide himself with a decent home because he can't make enough. We Have men living on the streets due to this system but the courts do nothing about it because it benefits them and their local government financially.
I'm so torn on this. As much as I WANTto say that a man should have the right to keep his unborn child (assuming the mother wants to terminate), that man isn't going to have to go through pregnancy and childbirth. I'm not willing to offer up my body to someone else's decisions, no matter the reason. So I guess I just can't agree with that, even though I KNOW how incredibly unfair that is. If the woman is willing to carry to term and then declines to be a part of the kid's life, I don't think she should have to pay child support, though. On the other hand, if a woman chooses to have a baby and the father doesn't want to be a part of the child's life, I definitely think it's unfair to force him to take responsibility. If she's choosing to keep the kid knowing that he doesn't want to be a part of it, then it should be her responsibility. I don't think a man should be allowed to force an abortion any more than I think he should be able to stop one, so I don't think that a woman should be able to make him pay for a child that he doesn't want. If the father is a part of the baby's life but has the child less often, I think he should pay support and vise versa, and if he starts out as part of that child's life and then leaves I think he should be required to pay as should she if the situation is reversed.
I totally agree that's y I dnt understand y women get upset wen they become single mothers or their bd dnt be around I no every woman wants to have a family but if he said no from the get go y would u be all mad n try to ruin his life cuz he dnt wana b with u
We choose when we decide to unzipped our pants, we choose when we decide to no use a condom, we choose when it feels doo good that we don't pull out or pill out late.everything past that point is up to thus woman to decide and men must live with it.
WE dated 2months before having sex. 3weeks later I was pregnant. He freaked, wanted us to "think" about options. I freaked saying no. 30weeks later he is having a son, excited, yet scared. We are just bestest friends now, committed to coparenting without fighting. Our arrangement is this, no child support but he takes care of diapers, personal things for baby as he grows. I take medical expenses and formula.
It should b a major decision between the both of them. I've seen some people chose differently and the dad wanted baby and HE took the baby from hospital and the mom had the visitation since she didn't want the responsibility. So any decision with a child should be decided with two ppl.
I feel like we as responsible adults kno wat were doing wen we hav unprotected sex...but if a man doesn't wana b thr for my child Im not gona make him...n I will never keep him frm doing his part as a parent if u don't hav nethng to do with ur child I want nuthn to do with tht but I will not make u pay child support...just my opinion I'm not into another man having to tell one how and wen to do for ur child bcuz he didn't tell u how and wen I wntd sex...
Not starting stuff ladies but are all you ladies who are saying he shouldnt have had sex if he didn't want pro life. Cuz if not that's hypocritical. I am pro life so I think they made the choice to put it in you need to step up and take care of what comes out lol whether it be child support actually being there or alternating time between the parents. But I just wanted to share my opinion cuz it should be a two way thing both participated both are responsible. Not that oh a woman can have an abortion if she's not ready but damn that worthless man for not paying child support. I think you both should step up and shut up (ha that just seemed to flow together lol) and if you don't want it to happen again you know how to prevent it but that's just my opinion not trying to offend anybody.
I think the real choice comes in deciding if you want to have sex with someone but don't want to get pregnant. Birth control fails all the time. I know our culture would say you can have sex with anyone you feel chemistry with (within reason) or with someone you love. But ultimately you can get pregnant because of it. There are an infinite number of things you can do with someone you love other than having sex so why chance getting pregnant with someone who doesn't want children. When I dated after giving my first son up for adoption I wouldn't even consider dating someone that didn't want to have children. It didn't matter how much chemistry we had. He could have hung the moon but if he didn't want to have children I wasn't going to waste my time. There were too many other things to do in my life. I wish I had made that decision before I went through the adoption. It would have changed my life.
Ya you both know how to prevent it. WOW. You mean she thinks if the guy says I don't want the baby, then 18 yrs of child raising is all her responsibility...with no help of any kind!?! Are you a woman hater? Women already take care of half the babies in the US by themselves! You want to make it worse! Men are important, and a father is important and necessary. Men are not obsolite! People like you seem to think men are just a decoration you can take or leave. Men also know that what comes out of their pp can make a baby. That's where the mans responsibility lies.
When I was 17 I became pregnant by someone who I was dating, nothing serious. I was young, dumb, and wasn't looking for someone who had good potential to be a daddy, just someone I could be a typical 17 year old with. As with all my pregnancies I was miserable but I knew that the outcome would be a beautiful child who I would always love. I had a supportive family who made sure I was happy and healthy and I ended up leaving the father because he was a f***ing idiot. Now if the situation were different and I were in a bad circumstance, and he wanted the child and I could not object... I cannot imagine what it would be like if I had no support system, and I had an unwanted pregnancy, being forced to go through 9 months to give my baby to as I said a f***ing idiot.. I wouldn't even trust him to watch my plant let alone my child.. I just, I couldn't. I thankfully, have and never will be in that situation. I don't believe anyone should be forced to be a parent. It's sad to say, but I personally feel some fathers are better off not being in their children's lives. Sure you can use them as a paycheck, but in the end, I found it was not worth it, it's too stressful and a too much of a hassle trying to teach an adult, to be an adult. If they can't grow a pair f*** em. It's my responsibility as a mother to give my children the best I possibly can, and sometimes a child's father just doesn't give them what they deserve. So that's why I found someone who does.
Comments
As for the abortion part idk about that at 18 i chose to have one even tho my bf at the time wanted to keep it. I knew it would have been a bad idea to keep and even tho it was hard and i had no support in doing it, it was the best thing i could have done and i don't regret it one bit he knows it now to and doesn't hate me for it
I was young, dumb, and wasn't looking for someone who had good potential to be a daddy, just someone I could be a typical 17 year old with.
As with all my pregnancies I was miserable but I knew that the outcome would be a beautiful child who I would always love. I had a supportive family who made sure I was happy and healthy and I ended up leaving the father because he was a f***ing idiot.
Now if the situation were different and I were in a bad circumstance, and he wanted the child and I could not object...
I cannot imagine what it would be like if I had no support system, and I had an unwanted pregnancy, being forced to go through 9 months to give my baby to as I said a f***ing idiot.. I wouldn't even trust him to watch my plant let alone my child.. I just, I couldn't. I thankfully, have and never will be in that situation.
I don't believe anyone should be forced to be a parent.
It's sad to say, but I personally feel some fathers are better off not being in their children's lives.
Sure you can use them as a paycheck, but in the end, I found it was not worth it, it's too stressful and a too much of a hassle trying to teach an adult, to be an adult.
If they can't grow a pair f*** em. It's my responsibility as a mother to give my children the best I possibly can, and sometimes a child's father just doesn't give them what they deserve. So that's why I found someone who does.
There are lots of sex shops that have un-impregnable items.