Does your childs father ever make your regret getting...

1stTiM3MommY1stTiM3MommY
edited June 2011 in Second Trimester
pregnant.. I don't regret my baby but damn where is the help:-? Some guys just don't know how to get it together, i mean here is my fiance love him to death but he lives unemployment to unemployment check a week which is only $230/week I live in GA and he's still in NY with all of the responsibilities we have on the way and only 4 months to go why won't he get a job and get his life together. Here i am getting all excited about my birthday coming up him coming to visit in 7 days and finally finding out the sex of our baby all in the same day but he's still giving his GREEDY ASS MOTHER rent money and she's not even paying rent. I am beyond through. When will guys get hit with the "DAMN I HAVE A BABY I NEED TO BE SAVING FOR" As woman it's always like natural instincts to make things happen. I'm so hurt and annoyed at the same time. Mind you ladies i haven't seen him in over a month. we had this plan to move out here together within a matter of 2 months and he only has 25 in his account. ughhh *Crying* So disappointed. Now I'm back to job hunting at 19 weeks pregnant, smh
MY LIFE! Wooosaaaaaaa

Comments

  • mommyto1soontob2mommyto1soontob2
    I feel u.. see we can do bad all by our self wtf we need a man for. I say ee do it together or I do it alone!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    was he the same way before you got pregnant?
  • 1stTiM3MommY1stTiM3MommY
    Well yea but i kind of expected him to tighten up or at least stand up to his mom a little more then he does. like she's a money hungry BITCH hate to say that but she is. How can you know someone has a family they need to prepare for especially if your not paying rent anymore for whatever reason she's not she's just taking his little checks every week. I'm sick of it'
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    Men aren't like us, pregnancy isnt gonna make a lazy man change. I truly hope he gets some back bone and get it together for the sake of yalls child. You shouldn't have to stress over stuff like this.

    There is nothing more ridiculous than a man that's not handling his business.
  • magcawmagcaw
    My husband is great, he helps me out and lets me be lazy and is really wonderful...BUT!! He can be a giant jackass and there have been times (more with my first than with my second or this one) when I seriously regretted getting pregnant because I felt so unbearably trapped. Part of it was my own horrible depression during pregnancy, and part of it was really just that he can be a total jerk when he's mad. :/
  • bambi_bumpbambi_bump
    My bf makes me regret it sometimes. I love my lil man but im going a little crazy. He works nights and Sunday to Thursday I might aswell be a single mother. I spend all day looking after both of them while he sleeps or messes about with the computer. Only time he even seems to notice he has a son is when hes complaining that his crying is keeping him awake, cos you know I get SO much sleep. But on the weekends hes a brilliant dad and theres nothing i like more than sitting listening to him sing or talk to the baby.
  • pregnantlettemamapregnantlettemama
    Everyday! im sooooo stressed out all the time. Im havin to support our two kids already. Idk what im gonna do when i have to go on maternity leave! Soooo freakin out! :(
  • A_Darling28A_Darling28
    My kids father has done nothing but stress me out my entire pregnancy and now I'm 35 weeks pregnant and he decides to stay out all night and be m.i.a. and he still hasn't bought a single thing for my son
  • VictoriaBVictoriaB
    At first I was worried that my husband regretted getting me pregnant. He just didn't seem interested in my pregnancy. I figured he's already had 3 kids so this isn't new for him like it is for me.

    We recently went to a festival and there were lots of babies and little kids and he kept saying that he wanted the baby out now so he could play with him while me and my friends looked at stuff. I'm also due in 98 days. He told me that he is excited, he just didn't want to focus on it when my due date was still so far away.

    We haven't saved any money, but my dad and my mil have been saving money for the baby. We're pretty much betting on getting most of what we need from the shower which kinda freaks me out, but we seriously hardly have money to pay rent right now :(
  • CarrieLeeCarrieLee
    All the time. My husband wanted another baby (a boy to be more specific) for a long time and I finally let it happen. Well he was excited at first and it seemed like he quickly lost interest in my pregnancy. Now that we know it's a girl he won't let go of his disappointment and doesn't show any happiness about our new baby on the way. He doesn't even want to buy any baby stuff. I wish I could get a job so I could have money to buy things for the baby, but getting a job right now isn't going to be possible. Fortunately my MIL has taken me shopping and helped out with baby needs. I just wish my husband would pamper me too like he should. How hard is it to give your pregnant wife a damn back massage after she does your laundry and cooks you dinner?
  • caroline8_pcaroline8_p
    Tell him to apply at starbucks! They r still hiring at diff locations throughout. Its atleast a try.
  • Mimii36Mimii36
    Ugh! I know what you mean!
  • MyLittleBlessingMyLittleBlessing
    I know how you feel! I gave my fiance til july to find a job. Otherwise I'm getting my old job back.(he doesn't want me to work there cause of some guy) but ummm sucks for him. Cause I'm not going to be living in my moms crowded house with 6 people and a new born! Smdh at some babydaddys!
  • roseisamommynowroseisamommynow
    Girl I kno exactly wat u mean.... to make it simple the best way to describe it is with four little words....I FUCKING HATE HIM!! (excuse my language).
  • moodymommiemoodymommie
    omg your post made me feel so much better...i know im not alone...my bf is excited sometimes but then he looses interest and blows all his money leaving me to save all by myself
  • preggointxpreggointx
    my bd is the worst but I have never regretted it
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • ashesashes
    Yes :( my bf spends all his money on useless crap. He goes to Ross and buys things like paintings, rugs, shirts he doesn't need (he has 3 loads worth of t-shirts) and other things. He's bought an Xbox, Nintendo, and wants to buy a laptop and a phone, so I know he will get them. He bought a bedroom set and mattress, new sheets and comforter... its annoying. And he talks about himself like he deserves it. Anything I've bought for the baby has been with my own money. He hasn't bought anything >=\

    I get so stressed thinking he's never going to grow up. And he wants to move out...I am not moving out :/ he doesn't even do things like read the books or care about labor classes or anything. Labor is going to come and he wont have a clue what's going on... it really depresses me to the point where I haven't talked to him in a few days. But he's called me a bitch to my face one too many times as well.... ughhh *sighhh*
  • 1stTiM3MommY1stTiM3MommY
    It's really good to know that I am not alone. I pretty much told him yesterday that i will continue going really seriously with my job hunt because someone needs to prepare for our childs arrival in 4 months. I have an interview today at 2 and another tomorrow at 10am. I am hoping i get something very soon, once i do i won't care what he does or doesn't do. he can continue to get his little $200/week and be content with that. My mom had to call him and let him know how much of a disappointment he is, although he is a great guy with a good heart he is too comfortable with his situation and more importantly with a seed on the way. WIth or without him I'm with my family now so me and my child will be taken care of. I think this is given me a serious wake up call & I realized I don't have time. I think everyone that commented on this post needs to stick together and be around for support as pregnant woman we don't need the stress we want some beautiful happy babies, Crying and worrying isn't the way to go. Thank you all for your comments it's good to know I'm in a boat with some other great woman! I don't regret my baby whatever it is, but maybe the timing.
  • 2lilblessings2lilblessings
    I feel u I'm going thru stuff with my bd too he's not being responsible enough and I'm the one buying mostly for my baby he only bought her a few really cheap stuff a matress and he doesn't want to buy anything else he frustrates me I didn't do the baby by myself ugh men
  • Mommyof4girlsMommyof4girls
    What kind of parents raise their sons to be soo lazy? Ok lets have sex pretty lady and when you get pregnant because I was either to selfish or to stupid or I made an impulse decision to be a dad you now have to be a single pretty mommy! Seriously! These are by no means men! Im disgusted by how these guys act. Im shocked their parents don't raise them better. I have a great husband! He gets annoyed when I read him this kind of stuff. I do too. It's a shame! Sorry you mommies have to go through this. They are not men. Just little boys who want to pretend to be men. A real man is a daddy, supports you financially and is a good husband. You don't need them. You just have to take care of yourselves and your babies and remember every guy who comes into your life won't be a knight in shining armor. You need to be extra careful because of your kiddo. Im praying for you! Don't ever regret your miracle!
  • 1stTiM3MommY1stTiM3MommY
    Awwww thanks so much @mommyof4girls that was some really great advice. I have removed my engagement ring so I'm def giving him an ultimatum. either he gets it together or were going to have a serious problem. It was ok when it was just us i could have cared less, but now we have a little person on the way and I'm NOT GOING TO SETTLE FOR IT. My stepmother is sending him someplace to get a job where it's guaranteed, we are waiting to see what happens; if he comes back with an excuse about they told him to call or bring a resume we know he's LIEING so i'll know from that point what he wants for us- his family and himself. if he lies that's it. the wedding is off and he will be a distant father to his unborn child i refuse to have that example be set to my child, everyone in my family are go getters no one is a bum, we are all very strong woman who are determined know what we want and we go for it. Oh yea and the idea of the baby if it's a boy being named after his father is OUT THE WINDOW!
  • Mommyof4girlsMommyof4girls
    I am soo proud of you! I had my oldest at 21 w a deadbeat who offered me marriage to 'take care of it'. I refused, laughed and left. I had a good job, a car and great parents. I got everything for my wonderful daughter. When she was 8-9 mos old I met an amazing man... he was 19 (I was 22) and a better support than my 25 yr old ex. We fell madly in love and I could 100% trust him. We had a little girl too. The girls are exactly 2 yrs apart. Well the ex got wind of the new guy and actually started being involved, by his new gf's urging, but non the less he was there for her. I bought a bigger used car and got rid of my little one, and saved and moved out when my youngest was less than 6 mos old. Just me and my 2 girls. My bf was scared too, and thought I couldn't do it. We had ups and downs for the next yr and a half. That was June of 07 I was 24 he was 21. Oct of 08 we got back together, June of 09 he moved back in, Dec of 09 we got engaged and March of 10 we got married. He is 25 now and the most awesome husband you could imagine! My ex still helps w my oldest daughter and my hudband still is the best step dad. Im now 28. I got us the 2 cars and the 3 bedroom cottage and he brought his amazing work ethic so I can stay home and his motorcycle of course, lol. I worked hard to get us what we have and he maintains it amazingly! We fight sometimes but God gave me an awesome man. Sometimes I had to fight for him and fight w him, but we love each other so much that at this point it's sooo rare. Im blessed and as long as you do right and don't expect anyone to take care of you and baby but you then you are on the right track. I didn't date while my hubby and I were apart or whatever it was. I haven't been w anyone other than my husband in over 7 yrs... Since I left my ex back in May of 04, 2 months pregnant. It def pays to be a good girl. God looks out for us. I don't have a need in the world! I have been blessed w exactly what and who I need in my life and along my journey. Ill pray for your needs to be met too and that only the obviously right people cross your path so you can easily skip the wrong. Best wishes to you! Im here if ever you need to talk! Just tag me in a message or inbox me. :)
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