You are doing a beautiful job especially pregnant and the awful things you found on his phone. Just remember everything is meant for a reason. Stay strong he is in my prayers. I wish you guys the best and please keep us updated.
update thursday I didnt go see louie eventhough I wanted to. I just been thinking about everything & he is doing good now, hes alive, hes talking more, not having conversations yet but saying more. yesterday I went to go see him for a couple hours bfor I took my little sisters to d movies. his dad stepmom & mom were there as well as two of his friends. I sat on his bed by his feet & he grabbed my arm pulling me closer, he hugged me and gave me a big long kiss, I moved my head to d side so he can kiss my cheek. & after that he was like 'ima mothafucker, just kidding' & he was smiling real big. as I sat there with him he rubbed my belly & would just stare at me, he had his hand on my leg & he asked me 'what r u ganna do'. bfor, anytime I was dressed up he would ask me that or where r u going. sittin next to him & gettn that kiss & him rubbing my belly made me feel great. but it doesnt mean hes changed. when his dad & stepmom left I let them know I wouldnt b coming to see him as much & he asked y, I just told him that I think he needs to see other people more too & he looked at me funny & said alright I guess il see you later. bfore I left his mom asked me why I said I wouldnt be coming to see him as much & I told her that louie had put me through alot of crap bfore this & how I had just found out he has more kids, & he was a cheater & a lier, & she understood . I told her I didnt want to keep getting taken advantage of by him & being stupid over someone who didnt care much for me or his baby. idk how d future will turn out but for now Im ganna focus on whats important & thats my health for my baby boy. I wont keep louie or his family from our baby but I also wont let him or them take my son alone, louie would take his daughter around many girl & hes not ganna do that with my baby, I dont want him to grow up being a slut like his dad. I just want for louie to fully recover, hes doing so good & making progress fast everyday hes improving more, I have no doubt he will b back as d louie we know in no time. the doctors kept telling us how he would never b himself, never talk, walk, or do anything but lay there & not know who we are.o his personality is coming back, hes being goofy like bfor, he is talking & saying more then jus one word at a time, I know after some therapy he will walk, & obviously he knows who we r. how would he know to rub my belly, if hes a 'vegestable' he wouldnt know im pregnant, or think im his girlfriend & kiss me. life is crazy, jus over a week ago everyone was preparing themselves for losing him forever & now hes fully alive on his own, hes so strong, miracles are possible he is proof! once hes able to walk & carry a conversation we want to take him to d crappy hospital where he was first at and let the doctors see what a 'vegestable' he is. were going to be taking him to doctors to keep up with his health & do more test on his brain because they wont do that at d nursing home where he is at. its so funny because theres nothing but lil old people there & hes this young guy full of tattoos, he shouldnt be there long though d way hes progressing. I feel happy.
Glad that he will get to know his baby. Sometimes its hard to let go of what happened but I believe in forgiving. Maybe not forgetting and always have a gaurd up but maybe the 2 of you need to actually talk about what happened that night and see where things go. A lot of times people that have had something horrible like this happen to them they change. I'm not saying just jump back into a relationship with him. But please please sit down and talk to him about everything and how you feel about everything. Maybe there is a chance that he will change and step up and be the father and a faithful boyfriend. He owes you his life. If it wasn't for you doing CPR he would of died. The body only lives 4 to 6 minutes without oxygen and with drive time for the ambulance and finding the place it takes longer than 4 to 6 minutes. He would have been dead. Just talk to him.
I definitly will talk to him when he is able to have that type of conversation with me because I have a lot to say. I do forgive him, im not holding a grudge against him for all hes done & regardless I still love him, idk if well ever b able to b together again but its ganna take much more then words thats for sure. I do know I saved his life but at d same time I kinda feel I caused that heart attack, I started d fighting & just kept going until he was dead. I just know things happen for a reason what d reason is for all if this mess I dont know yet but all I know is things are ganna get better.
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thursday I didnt go see louie eventhough I wanted to. I just been thinking about everything & he is doing good now, hes alive, hes talking more, not having conversations yet but saying more. yesterday I went to go see him for a couple hours bfor I took my little sisters to d movies. his dad stepmom & mom were there as well as two of his friends. I sat on his bed by his feet & he grabbed my arm pulling me closer, he hugged me and gave me a big long kiss, I moved my head to d side so he can kiss my cheek. & after that he was like 'ima mothafucker, just kidding' & he was smiling real big. as I sat there with him he rubbed my belly & would just stare at me, he had his hand on my leg & he asked me 'what r u ganna do'. bfor, anytime I was dressed up he would ask me that or where r u going. sittin next to him & gettn that kiss & him rubbing my belly made me feel great. but it doesnt mean hes changed. when his dad & stepmom left I let them know I wouldnt b coming to see him as much & he asked y, I just told him that I think he needs to see other people more too & he looked at me funny & said alright I guess il see you later. bfore I left his mom asked me why I said I wouldnt be coming to see him as much & I told her that louie had put me through alot of crap bfore this & how I had just found out he has more kids, & he was a cheater & a lier, & she understood . I told her I didnt want to keep getting taken advantage of by him & being stupid over someone who didnt care much for me or his baby. idk how d future will turn out but for now Im ganna focus on whats important & thats my health for my baby boy. I wont keep louie or his family from our baby but I also wont let him or them take my son alone, louie would take his daughter around many girl & hes not ganna do that with my baby, I dont want him to grow up being a slut like his dad.
I just want for louie to fully recover, hes doing so good & making progress fast everyday hes improving more, I have no doubt he will b back as d louie we know in no time. the doctors kept telling us how he would never b himself, never talk, walk, or do anything but lay there & not know who we are.o his personality is coming back, hes being goofy like bfor, he is talking & saying more then jus one word at a time, I know after some therapy he will walk, & obviously he knows who we r. how would he know to rub my belly, if hes a 'vegestable' he wouldnt know im pregnant, or think im his girlfriend & kiss me. life is crazy, jus over a week ago everyone was preparing themselves for losing him forever & now hes fully alive on his own, hes so strong, miracles are possible he is proof! once hes able to walk & carry a conversation we want to take him to d crappy hospital where he was first at and let the doctors see what a 'vegestable' he is. were going to be taking him to doctors to keep up with his health & do more test on his brain because they wont do that at d nursing home where he is at. its so funny because theres nothing but lil old people there & hes this young guy full of tattoos, he shouldnt be there long though d way hes progressing. I feel happy.