***health update @ bottom***MIL- wants me to postpone birth so she can vacation.
My mil has been asking my husband about being in delivery room for baby's arrival. He knows how I feel (NO way in hello) but tells her that shouldn't be a problem. So yesterday, I had to spend the day in hospital getting tests done bc my bp was way up (140/90) when the whole pregnancy it has been perfect. So he tells me that he thinks it would be a good idea if she were there and I calmly remind him that I asked him before not to ask me that because she has been so cruel (and acts like she never did anything wrong to him, he knows she did, but maintains I am taking it wrong and that I probably don't even know why I am mad anymore- to which I remind him it is all loud and clear because I have never seen her be so mean to anyone and am still hurt she directed all her venom at me- but somehow she feels I should apologize to her...) to me this whole pregnancy (at that time he agreed) but he says this would be a good way to mend the fences with her (again, I have to fix this when she lies behind my back and had gotten him to lie to me too to protect her). I told him no, the only people I want there are him, my BF and my mother but I can't have anyone but him bc I know it will start a war with his mother. So he says that it would be good to have my mom there and that way his mother could be there. I said no again, I am giving up my support so she can't call me the mega biotch when my mom was allowed and she wasn't for the rest of time. That I did not even want her in hospital let alone room and it was my who-ha on display with a human coming out of it so I get to decide who gets to be there, don't make me put her on the security escort out of the building list. So then he just ignores it and acts like I just said I will think about it and seems like he just changed subject to tell me how his parents just got season passes to the opera. That the first one will be October 7th. I said that is nice. So he says he told his mom that we were looking to induce the 8th. He tells me that she is asking us to postpone our inducing until after the opera. WTF???? I told him no, if Dr. P is available the 7th or 8th then that is when we are going and if they want to have their little date night, then they miss out. He looks at me like I'm a biotch. I said "what? If baby comes the 7th, they can come the next morning after the damn opera." He days, no, they will be gone the whole weekend, its in New York." So I got really pissed and told him I wasn't postponing my baby just so they can party in NYC, that is selfish and they need to get their priorities straight but all the better bc then I don't have to stress about her barging in on the delivery. I then reminded him how we tried for 6 yrs before this and 2 years ago she asked to avoid ttc for a couple months so that we would not be due in October of that year bc she was taking a month long vacation to Egypt. That she has a history of asking us to rearrange our lives and dreams to make her personal life better. That is continues to be bullshit. He isn't happy. He thinks I am going to change my mind. Then I get a text from mil asking me about if I still planned to be induced the 8th. I didn't reply. So my bp stayed up after that and had to stay longer. The good thing is there are a series of tests rated 1-8 in scoring and doctor said she got all perfect 8s and right now is very healthy (Thank-you God!) But has me on bedrest through weekend and testing urine all weekend too with follow up Monday morning. I'm trying to remain calm, but the thought of that woman being in the room when my baby is born just kills me. I know I'm just going to be stressed and resentful and she won't contribute anything positive. Where as my mom in situations like this is calm and supporting e, mil loses her mind and will be yelling dibs on first to hold baby (not that she would get that, but I don't need that crap). I KNOW I am not the only person with a psycho mil, and some of you know the crazy this woman has. I'm not being unreasonable, like I said she has been cruel and I don't want that while trying to have a positive pregnancy. I am def putting her on security list and make sure nurses know she is not to be in room when it happens (or before or after for awhile for that matter). My husband is supposed to take me to Dr appt Monday for follow up, but bc of work can't make it so bc I am not allowed to drive I have to rely on her for a ride. I know this is going to come up and she has no problem cornering me either. So while I am supposed to stay calm, I have this stressing me out all weekend. 
I finally saved up enough money to get the carseat and was going to do that this morning but now, nope. I have to wait and I'm scared that if this doesn't go down, I'm going to have to rely on hubby to get the rest of baby gear we need (which wouldn't be issue but he will take his mother who will get the exact opposite of what I researched, planned and saved for and waited for coupons for and they will use the money I set aside for it and I won't be in a situation to return or rectify it either). I really want to calm down, but I really want to lay out some throat punches too.
I finally saved up enough money to get the carseat and was going to do that this morning but now, nope. I have to wait and I'm scared that if this doesn't go down, I'm going to have to rely on hubby to get the rest of baby gear we need (which wouldn't be issue but he will take his mother who will get the exact opposite of what I researched, planned and saved for and waited for coupons for and they will use the money I set aside for it and I won't be in a situation to return or rectify it either). I really want to calm down, but I really want to lay out some throat punches too.
Comments
I hope things get better for you soon!
@laura536 how did you manage that??? My mil is so most, you can't get away with anything!
@mrs_shu I've contemplated.... Even heard breast pumping can induce... So scared I'm going to screw something up though, I'm a chicken with this little baby!
Stand your ground and dont give up having your mom and bf in there with you! This is going to be a hard thing and you need the support! You need to sit down with your husband and explain it to him as simply as you can.
If your mil corners you be stright up with her!! For 4yrs I kept my mouth shut & just let my mil steem roll over my husband & I.. We have both since started standing our ground and are much happier not taking his parents crap!
Good luck momma and dont waver! Im here if you need to talk! I 100% know what your going through!
@feb2012mommy doesn't know where you live??? What a nice dream for me lol. Chain lock on door is about as close to privacy as I'm going to see.
@pnsw524 I'll try to talk to him again, but I think I will wait until after this weekend and hopefully bp goes down. If not, I think Monday anyway. I really don't want to give up on having mom and BD there! You're right, need to stand up to her, but I have to do it when hubby or someone is there with me, bc she will twist my words and make it like I said thongs I did not. I know this about her now (had me fooled for seven years even though I did see her actions revealing in tiny increments over the last seven year of my marraige, if she doesn't get her way, it does not go well for anyone and yes I am tired of always pacifying her). Thank-you, hopefully I can stay calm enough to mot look like the hormonal pregnant witch she makes me out to be!
But do the doctors know what is causing your high bp?? Is everything okay with the baby?? Are they delivering early, or is October 8th around your due date?
Good luck Mama!!! (:
@three_cats_n_a_baby maybe they are related... She was adopted so you never know! Yeah, I shouldn't have, but read hubby's emails and she said that I would go back to work, she gets the baby. So she is plotting the take over. You got it right, yet do Ho psycho!
@three_cats_n_a_baby maybe they are related... She was adopted so you never know! Yeah, I shouldn't have, but read hubby's emails and she said that I would go back to work, she gets the baby. So she is plotting the take over. You got it right, they do go psycho!